MIDLIFE CHALLENGES FuLin Y Lee Ph D Licensed

人到中年: 心事誰人知 MIDLIFE CHALLENGES 李楊馥璘諮商心理學博士 Fu-Lin Y. Lee, Ph. D. Licensed Clinical Psychologist Fairfax, Virginia 703 -847 -0459

By Nancy Chodash , October 22, 2013

Common Physical Changes v. Weight gain, wrinkles, sagging skins, hair loss, graying hair, hormone fluctuations, eye sight changes, cognitive decline, change in sex drive, fatigue, menopause related symptoms… v increased health risks, such as hypertension, diabetes, thyroid, cancer, arthritis, lowered immunity. . .

Psychosocial and Spiritual Quest v. Am I good enough? v. Am I worthwhile ? v. Do I belong? v. Do I get the appreciation or respect I deserve? v. What’s the meaning of life? v. Will it get better?

Warning Signs of a Midlife Crisis www. drphil. com/articles/article/694 • • • • • A decrease in weight, a new obsession with exercise and physical appearance. Unhappiness with life and lifestyle that previously made him or her happy. Boredom with people and things that may have previously been of interest. Feeling a need for adventure and change. Questioning the choices and decisions he or she has made in life. Confusion about who he or she is and where his or her life is headed. Anger at his or her spouse and placing blame for feeling tied down. Unable to make decisions about where he or she wants to go in life. Doubt over ever loving his or her spouse and resentment over the marriage. A desire for a new and passionate, intimate relationship. A sense of remorse for goals not accomplished. Frequent daydreaming or feelings of nostalgia. Acting on compulsions with food, drugs or alcohol. Greatly increased or decreased sexual desire. Sexual affairs, especially with someone much younger. A desire to achieve a feeling of youthfulness. Greatly increased or decreased ambition.

Define Midlife v. Not a medical condition itself, most spoken of in popular culture since the 80’s v. Nowadays, roughly age 40 to 60 v. A critical phase in human development v. A normal stage of life, a transition, a passage v. A period that varies vastly among individuals v. A time to reflect and re-assess

Psychosocial Stages Erikson’s (1959) theory of psychosocial stages Mc. Leod, S. A. (2013). Erikson. Retrieved from www. simplypsychology. org/Erik-Erikson. html

Common Stressors v. More likely to experience the deaths of love ones v. Role/Responsibility overload/Exhaustion v. Physical declines/changes and health concerns v. Awareness of mortality or “impending death” v. Unrealized goals v. Life dissatisfaction –career, finances, & relationships, etc. v. Cultural pressure: anti-aging & eternal youth

Our Specific or Chronic Stressors v. Fitting in and thriving as a minority group v. Family obligations and frequent travels if family are not in the U. S. v. Generation gaps – “new and expanded” amid diversity v. Limited resources and support v “落葉歸根”

Clinical Concerns • Depression • Losses and grief • Anxiety • Abuse or trauma • Anger, bitterness, • Exhaustion aggression • Sleep • Appetite • Cognitive decline • Health concerns • Marriage • Family relationships • Work-Life balance • Work-related issues • Addiction • Substance abuse • Early retirement • Etc.

When Midlife Crisis Turns into Depression --Web. MD 2015 v. Change in eating habits v. Change in sleeping habits, fatigue v. Feeling of pessimism or hopelessness v. Restlessness, anxiety or irritability v. Feeling of guilt, helplessness or worthlessness v. Loss of interest in activities once enjoyed, including sex and hobbies. v. Thoughts of suicide or attempts at suicide v. Physical aches or pains such as headaches or gastrointestinal upset that don’t respond to treatment

Normal or Disordered? Aspects to assess: v. External stressors/triggers v. Single/cumulative experiences v. Medical/biological/genetic factors v. Emotion, Cognition, and Behaviors v. Intensity, duration, and severity v. Personality and ego strengths v. Impairment in personal, interpersonal, home or work life vetc.

Treatment v. Physical exams to rule out medically or substance induced conditions v. Psychotherapy Individual, marital, family, group, etc. v. Psychotropic meds Anti-anxiety, anti-depressant and anti- psychotic v. Medical treatment v. Alternative meds & holistic approaches Mindfulness, yoga, meditation, relaxation, etc. v. Self-help

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Prevention q Keep up with healthy habits q Make desirable changes before or during midlife q Nourish important relationships q Maintain social support and involvement q Open to accept changes as a normal part of life and see them as challenges q Positive attitude: likely a period of tremendous growth, enlightening q Resiliency q Spiritual growth

My Country and My People, Epilogue Lin Yu. Tang, 1935 I like spring, but it is too young. I like summer, but it too proud. So I like best of all autumn, because its leaves are a little yellow, its tone mellower, its colors richer, and it is tinged a little with sorrow and a premonition of death. Its golden richness speaks not of the innocence of spring, nor of the power of summer, but of the mellowness and kindly wisdom of approaching age. It knows the limitations of life and is content. From a knowledge of those limitations and its richness of experience emerges a symphony of colors, richer than all, its green speaking of life and strength, its orange speaking of golden content and its purple of resignation and death. And the moon shines over it, and its brow seems white with reflections, but when the setting sun touches it with an evening glow, it can still laugh cheerily. An early mountain breeze brushes by and sends its shivering leaves dancing gaily to the ground, and you do not know whether the song of the failing leaves is the song of laughter or of parting tears. For it is the Song of the Spirit of Early Autumn, the spirit of calm and wisdom and maturity, which smiles at sorrow itself and praises the exhilaration, keen, cool air…