Mens Voices Ireland IGNORANCE AGENCY SHAME Or Why

Men’s Voices Ireland IGNORANCE, AGENCY & SHAME Or, ‘Why Don’t Young Men Stand up for Themselves? ’ James Behan – 18/11/

PART I: IGNORANCE

IGNORANCE – TWO VIEWS ON BEING A MAN The Sensationalised Expectation The Quiet Reality • Breezing through life in the Old Boys’ • Falling behind in education at all Club! levels • Dominance in society, as in the • Majority of dirty, life-threatening boardroom and Dáil or dangerous jobs (not just • Superior position in terms of rights & based on physical demands access to services either)

MEN LACKING RIGHTS MEN LACKING SERV IS THIS GUY SERIOUS?

THE RIGHTS GAP • Unmarried fathers have no automatic guardianship or custody rights over their children. …. but they do have a legal obligation to pay maintenance regardless. • An unmarried dad who is appointed a joint guardian can have those rights abrogated later if it is in the child’s best interest (but not mam, unless the child is adopted) • Marriage ‘‘‘solves’’’ this problem, but in relationship breakdowns, fathers’ visitation and custody rights are

THE SERVICES GAP: A SIMPLE ILLUSTRATION Let’s see how Ireland ‘looks after’ its male victims of intimate partner violence: “This survey suggests that in the region of 213, 000 women and 88, 000 men in Ireland have been severely abused by a partner at some point in their lives” - Report on the National Study of Domestic Abuse (2005) • There are no domestic violence shelters for men • There is one organisation, AMEN, based in Meath which deals with male victims • Based on 2012 figures, less than 1% of spending on Domestic Violence services in Ireland was for male victims

IGNORANCE & MASCULINITY • Men – young men in particular – are more likely to engage in competitive, risk-taking behaviour. • This has negative consequences e. g. car accidents, ‘misadventure’ • Also a major driver of innovation & entrepreneurship, important for leadership and the attainment of status 1) Generally high risk-taking behaviour combined with ignorance around men’s issues (and especially rights) is conceptions a deadly combination. 2) Academic and media of men & masculinity are encouraging ignorance around

PART II: AGENCY

WHAT IS ‘AGENCY? ’ • Agency is the ability to act independently for oneself and influence the world around oneself. • Traditional views of men and masculinity place a high value on agency e. g. the ‘protector provider’ role. • Conversely, we typically tend to downplay female agency e. g. common attitudes towards female abusers, even when victims are underage pupils mportant: I’m not just talking about ‘chivalry’ or ‘old-fashioned’ e towards male-female agency is also embedded in ‘progress

• A BRIEF HISTORY OF MALE AGENCY The Dawn of Humanity – c. Late 20 th Century: ‘It’s men’s responsibility to protect women, because men are the ones with agency in society. ’. . . decades of activism later: • Late 20 th Century – Present day: ‘Men and women are equals. However, it’s still men’s responsibility to protect women because they are the ones with agency in society. ’

MALE AGENCY: COLLECTIVE RESP Take Home: Men are collectively responsible for any misdeeds of any individual man, even if they themselves did

MALE VS FEMALE AGENCY: A CASE STUDY • The agency dichotomy between men and women helps to explain the inertia evident in addressing the education crisis. 3 rd Level % by Gender Distribution of Gender by Field of Study Source: Irish Universities Study Gender at a Glance (2009 Draft Report) Health And Welfare

MALE VS FEMALE AGENCY SUMMARISED When women are in an unfavourable environment, we must change the environment. When men are in an unfavourable environment, we must change the man.

A BIT OF HOPE? • Constant refrain in society: ‘men don’t reach out…men are too stubborn to use services’ • Last 5 years the Men’s Sheds movement has exploded in popularity in Ireland • Little bit of deference to men’s needs goes a long way

PART III: SHAME “The least that men can do is that every man of fighting age should prepare himself to redeem his word to women, and to make ready to do his best, to save the mothers, the wives and daughters of Great Britain from outrage too horrible even to think of. ” Emmeline Pankhurst, Suffragette

THE WHITE FEATHER • The Order of the White Feather founded 1914 by Admiral Charles Fitzgerald • A white feather of cowardice presented to men who appeared to have not enlisted in the army by women • The campaign was so successful that “What Fitzgerald had deftly understood waslied thatabout there their even underage boys was something thatage wasin more terrifying youthful order to jointothe war effort Englishmen than a gruesome death on some foreign battlefield. ” Peter J. Hart, The White Feather Campaign: A Struggle with Masculinity During World War I

THE WHITE FEATHER IN 2017?

MALE SHAME & ACTIVISM

MALE SHAME & ACTIVISM These are some comments posted to our ad on Facebook pointing out the absurd degree of misandry (i. e. man hating) in media: “Moaning about 'mens rights' just makes you slaves of that establishment. You're just adding your voices to the muck and filth women have had to put up with for far too long. Time to grow up 'lads'. ” “ 9 out of ten serial killers are men murdering women. The male population of prisons is way larger than the female. 99% of mass shooting in the States and elsewhere carried out by men. 90% of domestic murders carried out by men on their female partners/spouses. “Hell even elderly people are more stigmatised and disregarded Etc, etc. ” than we are as a group. If we're so angry about discrimination why even bother starting with us? You don't barge into A&E

MALE SHAME & ACTIVISM • For all the talk of ‘toxic masculinity’, male shaming is perpetuated by both men and women. • It is a tactic employed whenever men are not behaving in a way that society would like them to behave. • Has its roots in traditionalism but is readily employed by progressives, feminists, egalitarians and others Young highlygender perceptive of what is ‘expected’ of whomen claimare to want equality. them. It should be no surprise that they want nothing to do with any activism around men’s issues when those who engage in it are so regularly shamed

WHAT CAN BE DONE? SOME PRACTICAL SUGGESTIONS • Young men need to be frankly informed of the IGNORANCE reality that many men face – unmarried fathers lacking rights, the lack of DV facilities, education crisis. Too often activism starts after negative • consequences. Expectation of men to ‘pull selves up by their AGENCY bootstraps’ often goes too far, in particular when hyperagency is expected of boys. • Media figures who collectivise guilt and heap shame on men should be called out for their misandry, exactly SHAME all as they would be if they spoke about women, gays, particular racial groups etc. in the same way. • Men need to ask themselves if it is reasonable for them to internalise shame to the extent that they do. Original sin?

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