Social Fitness Theory and Practice Lynne Henderson Shyness

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Lynne Henderson Shyness Institute & Stanford University November 13, 2009 Connecticut Psychological Association Henderson #1

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Overview Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Definitions The Model Social Fitness Training Background: Self-blame and Shame in Shyness Two Vicious Cycles and Infinite Loops Changing Self-blame Other-blame and Anger Correlated an Interpersonal problem, Impact on Empathy Three Vicious Cycles: Fight - Flight; Shame - Self-blame; Resentment - Blaming Others How do we change negative attributions, & shame & anger? Shy. Q: new shyness questionnaire Henderson #2

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice The Experience of Shyness SAD FIXS Self - Blame and Shame Avoidance Distress Fear of Negative Evaluation I Must, but I Can't! X-posure: Fear of both Failure & Success Self - Sabotage Henderson #3

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Perspectives: Integrated Clinical Research Practice design reflect treatment test analyze question measure theory Henderson #4

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Social Fitness Model Social Fitness addresses both needs for emotional connection and needs for agency or competence. Social Fitness implies satisfying interpersonal relationships, adequate emotion regulation, an adaptive cognitive style, and the proactive pursuit of personal and professional goals. Social Fitness involves frequent social exercise. There are many situations in which to practice and many kinds of behaviors that may be considered adaptive. Just as people play golf, tennis, hike, and jog to stay physically fit, people join groups and communities, maintain close relationships, meet new people, cultivate friendships, and develop intimacy with a partner to stay socially fit. Henderson #5

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Social Fitness: Cognition and Emotion Adaptive thinking patterns and emotion regulation are important components of social fitness. Shy individuals reverse the self-enhancement bias in social situations, blame themselves and others, and experience shame and resentment. When one is ashamed, others appear contemptuous, when fearful, others look dangerous, when vulnerable, others appear powerful and potentially threatening. Negative emotion and negative thoughts affect each other in an escalating reciprocal pattern. Henderson #6

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Infinite Loops Fight/Flight Henderson Shame/self-blame Anger/other-blame fear shame anger negative predictions self-blame other-blame Approach Avoidance Resentment #7

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Social Fitness Training Twenty-six Weekly Two-hour Cognitive-Behavioral Group sessions within an interpersonal theory framework Daily Workouts Self-Monitoring, Self-reinforcement Exposures with Cognitive Restructuring Changing negative attributions, beliefs about the self and others Social Skills Training - the second 13 weeks: Reaching out Communication Training - Where do I go from here? Building intimacy - self-disclosure, handling criticism, conflict Expression of Feelings Empathy - listening Attentional Focus Flexibility Training: self- other, empathic response Video Taping, Mirror Wall Henderson #8

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Client Demographics GENDER AGE EDUCATION MARITAL STATUS N 507 499 462 477 OCCUPATION 468 ETHNICITY 438 Henderson 63% MALE; 37% FEMALE 16 - 71 M = 34 4 - 26 M = 16 70% NEVER MARRIED 11% DIVORCED/SEP 40% PROFESSIONAL 21% BUSINESS 13% STUDENT 2% HOMEMAKER 6. 4% UNEMPLOYED 8% LAB/TECHNICIAN 79% CAUCASION 11% ASIAN 10% OTHER #9

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Clients’ Pre-test Scores MILLON-APD SAD BDI BFNE HEND/ZIM SHYQ SAQ-Self-blame SAQ-Shame EOS-Other Blame IIP-Socially avoidant SELF-ESTEEM TRAIT ANXIETY ENTITY THEORY EMOT SUPPRESS REAPPRAISAL Henderson N 152 277 182 138 67 79 78 100 119 296 267 32 30 30 70% YES; 94% YES 1 -5 1 -9 0 -4 1 -7 0 - 32 0 - 100% 1 -5 1 -7 30% NO 6% N 0 M = 12 M = 4. 0 M = 3. 5 M = 6. 0 M = 2. 7 M = 3. 7 M = 22. 0 M = 43. 8 M = 89% M = 3. 2 M = 4. 3 M = 3. 6 # 10

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Current Post-tests BDI BFNE HEND/ZIM SHYQ SAQ-Self-blame SAQ-Shame EOS-Other Blame IIP-Socially avoidant ENTITY THEORY EMOT SUPPRESS REAPPRAISAL SUDS GOAL ATTAINMENT Henderson N 182 138 67 79 78 100 119 2 12 12 111 144 1 -5 1 -9 0 -4 1 -7 0 - 32 1 -5 1 -7 0 - 100 0 - 10 Post-test M = 7. 8 M = 3. 3 M = 2. 9 M = 3. 2 M = 1. 6 M = 3. 1 M = 16. 5 M = 2. 6 (ns) M = 4. 3 (ns) M = 4. 0 (ns) M = 31% M = 6. 4 # 11

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Significant results: Clinic N t IIP-Avoidant IIP-Hostile IIP-Non-assertive IIP-Submissive dependent Depression Brief Fear of Neg Eval Social Anxiety Social Avoidance and Distress Trait Shame Trait Guilt STAXI Anger In Fearfulness Henderson 30 30 95 54 96 60 90 67 38 17 4. 15 4. 72 3. 37 3. 63 5. 86 5. 57 5. 42 6. 97 4. 96 2. 86 2. 05 2. 18 p . 000. 001. 002. 001. 000. 01. 05 # 12

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Stanford Students Changed Self-blaming Attributions and Reduced Shame in Eight -week Groups Negative interpersonal outcomes: Internal, stable and global attributions Self-blame and state shame Social anxiety social avoidance and distress trait shame depression Henderson # 13

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Results Self-blame Henderson State-shame # 14

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Results Internal Henderson Global Stable # 15

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Significant results: Students N Fear Depression Fear of Neg Eval Social Anxiety Social Avoidance and Distress Trait Shame Trait Guilt Mattick Social Phobia Henderson 25 27 26 25 26 26 F 4. 52 8. 86 28. 48 19. 82 23. 02 17. 76 6. 96 15. 65 p . 05. 01. 0001. 001 # 16

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Clinic Follow-up Study Sample of Clients treated between 1994 - 1999 N = 43 ADIS Severity 0 -8 Pre-test Mean 5. 8 Interference 0 -8 Mean 5. 7 Post-test Follow-up SD 1. 3 Mean 3. 9 SD 1. 5 Mean 3. 6 SD 1. 7 SD 1. 6 Mean 3. 5 SD 1. 8 Mean 3. 6 SD 1. 9 Satisfaction 1 - 10 7. 9 2. 1 Sample included clinic clients six months to five years post-group. No correlation between length of time post-group and ADIS scores. Henderson # 17

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Shame and Anger in Shyness: Clinic Sample Shame predicts self-defeating behavior, passive aggression (MCMI). Shame is correlated with resentment and antisocial attitudes (MMPI). Clients with Avoidant Personality Disorder are: more shame-prone, more likely to externalize blame Henderson # 18

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice STAXI Shyness Clinic Sample N = 115 Trait Anger-in Mean percentile 63 78 SD 27 Henderson 24 # 19

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Shame And Anger In College Student Sample Shame and anger in Stanford students SHY students NON-SHY students Henderson # 20

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Anger-supporting Thoughts and Beliefs about Others: Students To what extent do you relate to each of these statements? Please make a rating on a 7 point scale from 1 (not at all) to 7 (very much). Shy Non-shy 3. 5 2. 3 3. 3 1. 6 4. 6 2. 1 will 3. 5 1. 5 of me. 3. 2 1. 8 2. 9 1. 7 Henderson People will be rejecting and hurtful if I let them close to me. People do not relate to my problems. I must not let people know too much about me because they misuse the information. People are more powerful than I am and will take advantage If people see my discomfort they will feel contempt for me. People will make fun of me and ridicule me. # 21

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Anger-supporting Thoughts and Beliefs Shy Students vs. Clinic Sample Clinic clients Shy Students Henderson # 22

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Reducing Other-blame and Resentment N 99 t 5. 86 p. 000 STAXI Trait Anger M = 63%; 57% 113 2. 05 . 01 STAXI Anger In M = 78%; 69% 115 3. 53 . 00 EOS-Thoughts/Others M = 3. 7; 3. 1 (1 -7) Henderson # 23

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice The “Henderson/Zimbardo” Shyness Questionnaire I blame myself when things do not go the way I want them to. I sometimes feel ashamed after social situations. I am usually aware of my feelings, even if I do not know what prompted them. If someone rejects me I assume that I have done something wrong. I tend to be more critical of other people than I appear to be. Henderson # 24

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Shy. Q. (at www. shyness. com) (Rating scale from 1, not at all characteristic of me to 5, extremely characteristic of me) Web site respondents: M=3. 6 (SD=. 6) Stanford students: M=2. 5 (SD=. 6) Clinic Sample: M=3. 6 (SD. 56). Chronbach’s Alpha for six samples=. 92 Correlation with the Revised Cheek and Buss Shyness Scale (college samples) =. 6 and. 67 (Melchior and Cheek, 1990). Henderson # 25

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Shy. Q, Convergent Validity: Correlations with Clinic Scales Correlation_ BFNE. 77 STAXI Anger in: . 60 EOS. 73 Fearfulness (EAS). 52 Coopersmith SE -. 67 Trait Shame (PFQ). 75 Inner focus (PRSC). 55 BDI. 56 Highly Sensitive (HSP). 49 RCBS. 74 Henderson N_ 36 40 40 40 39 p . 000. 001. 000 # 26

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Avoidant Personality Disorder Henderson pre-post N (58) APD (44) Non-APD (14) Shy Q. M 3. 7 - 3. 0 3. 1 - 2. 7 N = 89 APD (69) Non-APD (20) EOS M 3. 9 - 3. 0 3. 2 - 3. 0 N = 103 APD (85) Non-APD (18) Anger-in M 83% - 73% 65% - 55% # 27

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Shyness and Communal Values Correlations with CSIV scales Locke’s Circumplex Scale of Interpersonal Values, Student Sample N = 77 Shy. Q. scores are associated with putting others’ needs first (. 53), avoiding social humiliation (. 42), avoiding anger (. 39), and with feeling connected to others (. 22). The Shy. Q. is NOT associated with valuing forcefulness, having the upper hand, seeking revenge, or having an impact. Henderson # 28

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Conclusions Good News: We have come a long way from the Prison Study. Bad News: There is a long way to go. The Shy. Q is a clinically sensitive scale for the chronically shy and those with generalized social anxiety disorder. Hopes and Plans: We need to become more effective at helping shy clients regulate negative emotion. We need to focus more on the strengths of shyness. We are conducting an Interview study of outstanding shy leaders Question: Does shyness become a clinical problem because our society currently disavows and rejects sensitivity, and cooperative and collaborative vs. dominant or aggressive behavior? Henderson # 29

Social Fitness: Theory and Practice Thank you Contact information: Lynne Henderson, Ph. D. Director, Shyness Institute Consultant, Shyness Clinic Adjunct faculty, Continuing Studies: Stanford University lynneh 1@Stanford. edu www. shyness. com Henderson # 30