Relationships Do Now Write down your definition of

Relationships

Do Now: Write down your definition of “love” Do not put your name with your definition, but instead put below your definition “boy” or “girl” in parentheses

Foundations of Healthy Relationships Relationship – A bond or connection you have with other people Relationships effect your physical, mental, and social health You should feel safe, secure, valued, and recognized in your relationships Healthy Relationship – Based on shared values and interests and mutual respect Both people benefit and feel comfortable What are some characteristics of healthy relationships?

Family Relationships Involve your immediate family and extended family; last your entire life Can provide you with support (physical & emotional) Can teach you values/morals Can provide love, care, and encouragement

Friendships Friendship – A significant relationship between 2 people that is based on caring, trust, and consideration Share confidences, interests, hobbies, or other friends Similar values Influence your self-concept and behavior; help you resist negative influences

Gender Issues in Friendships Women’s Friendships: Emotional Intimacy Sharing Expressions of feelings and self-disclosure Men’s Friendships: Activity Based Barrier to intimacy May find emotional intimacy easier with women

Peer Relationships Cliques Small circle of friends usually with similar backgrounds or tastes who exclude people viewed as outsiders Can be positive (sense of belonging) and negative (based on Stereotypes) Friendships Platonic Friendships Friendship with a member of the opposite gender in which there is affection but the 2 people are not considered a couple What are the benefits to having a platonic friendship? Casual Friendships Close Friendships

Dating 1920’s: Finding suitable marriage partners for companionship style marriages Why do people date today? Dating can be a learning experience Learn about others; Learn about yourself Not everyone dates: Shyness Other interests or time constraints Family traditions or values

Dating Avoid risk in dating Common dating problems: Staying in a relationship because you don’t know how to leave it Clinging to a person who wishes to end the relationship Set limits through communication

Marriage Reasons for selecting a partner: Love Mutual Attraction Intelligence Education Pleasing personality

Concepts of Love & Marriage Men have more traditional concepts of love and marriage Men are more likely to not marry without love Married men are physically and mentally healthier then unmarried men Both men & women find marriage more satisfying than co-habilitation

Conflicts in Relationships Communication Division of Household Labor Money Employment Power Sex

Communication Women create emotional intimacy through talk and self disclosure. This is how they connect with one another. Most wives don’t count sex as communication or a method for establishing intimacy Men do so through activity, e. g. ; sex

Division of Labor Second shift: women work outside home & perform the majority of housework and childcare. Women do 2 -3 x’s more housework & childcare. Employed women do less housework Chores tend to be divided along gender stereotypes

Household Labor Gay & Lesbian Couples share more equally Social class important: working class couples are more likely to share 25 -33% of wives believe their husbands are not doing a fair share Greatest satisfaction: division of chores almost equal.

Household work increases for women and decreases for men: When they are married Have lower levels of education Have children

Conflicts Decreases stability & satisfaction Increases the chance of dissolution Married couples less likely to break up from lower levels of conflict except in early years.

Dissolving Relationships Love relationships w/o marriage more likely to dissolve 50% of marriages end in divorce Reasons for women: didn’t get emotional intimacy; husbands didn’t communicate Reasons for men: didn’t get emotional support & physical affection Dissatisfaction with sexual relationship 34% had affairs