Your Childs Temperament Understanding appreciating and developing your

Your Child’s Temperament Understanding, appreciating and developing your children’s unique personality Goals for our discussion: - To understand the strengths and weaknesses of your children - To understand how you & your child’s temperaments interact

Your Child’s Temperament - To guide your children in establishing realistic goals for themselves Temperament classification: • It observes how surroundings affect one’s feelings, intellect and will - & which one predominately determines one’s actions.

Your Child’s Temperament Sanguine Choleric Emotions predominate Will predominates External focus Melancholic Phlegmatic Emotions predominate Intellect predominates Internal focus

Your Child’s Temperament The Sanguine Strengths Weaknesses Outgoing Friendly Happy Spontaneous Fun Empathetic Talkative Swift mood swings Distracted “I forgot” Easily bored Moody/ hot tempered Exaggerates Little impulse control Disorganized Weak-willed Seeks attention

Your Child’s Temperament The Sanguine They fully intend to be obedient and please but they get swept away with curiosity or a change of environment. Although many times he seems to be premeditatedly disobedient, he actually is just forgetting the past and engulfed in the present moment. He easily forgets the past punishment and does not consider the problem is disobedience may present him. How to Develop Your Child’s Temperament by Beverly La. Haye pg. 16

Your Child’s Temperament The Sanguine Dealing with the weaknesses: - Help them learn to followthrough by coming up with reminder aids. - Must learn to lean against their feelings - Teach them healthy fear - Teach them honesty - Give consequences (deny social)

Your Child’s Temperament The Sanguine Weaknesses continued: - Delayed gratification - They do make choices Developing strengths: - Acts of mercy and compassion - Help them actualize their big (but realistic) dreams.

Your Child’s Temperament The Choleric Strengths Weaknesses Strong willed Independent Leader Practical Decisive Confident Perseverance Productive Strong willed Unaffectionate Defiant Bossy Mean Proud Impatient Crafty

Your Child’s Temperament The Choleric Dealing with the weaknesses: - You must win their respect and the battle with firmness and on principle - Consistent consequences - They must learn to admit wrong & apologize - Must develop empathy - Ability to be grateful and enjoy

Your Child’s Temperament The Choleric Developing strengths: - Leadership - Responsibility - Problem-solving & building

Your Child’s Temperament The Melancholic Strengths Weaknesses Deep thinker Creative Idealistic Sensitive Loyal Detailed Thoughtful Gifted Pessimistic Unforgiving Perfectionistic Indecisive Distrustful Fearful Critical Rigid

Your Child’s Temperament The Melancholic “It is easy for him to have his feelings hurt and to feel inferior, believing that others do not like him. Even though he may possess the greatest talents of any of the temperaments, he suffers under the delusion of an inferiority complex. ” How to Develop Your Child’s Temperament Beverly La. Haye pg. 21 -22. Because of his sensitive nature and tendency towards perfection, you must be careful of how you critic.

Your Child’s Temperament The Melancholic Dealing with the weaknesses: - Accept the imperfections of life - Keep them talking - Teach them gratitude - Teach them to distrust their conclusions - They must forgive and ask forgiveness - Teach them to face their fears

Your Child’s Temperament The Melancholic Developing strengths: - Develop their creative abilities - Develop their passions and concerns - Tap into their insight

Your Child’s Temperament The Phlegmatic Strengths Weaknesses Dependable Diplomat Adaptable Friendly Observer Patient Diplomatic Easy going Fearful Indecisive Indifferent Aimless Unmotivated Teaser Self-righteous Stingy

Your Child’s Temperament The Phlegmatic Dealing with the weaknesses: - Get them moving and involved - Help them develop opinions and convictions - Help them enter and resolve conflict - Follow through in a timely manner - Urge “scary steps”

Your Child’s Temperament The Phlegmatic Developing Strengths: - S/he is the peacemaker - Can be a calm stabilizing force - Is usually a practical thinker - Find interest and help keep them involved

Your Child’s Temperament General guidelines for understanding of weaknesses: - You will need more patience with each temperamental weakness (Ephesians 6: 4) - Don’t allow them to use it as an excuse - Lean against judging their motives

Your Child’s Temperament Parent/ Child dynamic: - Know your own temperament and understand the dynamic between the two - Explain temperamental differences to your children - Allow your child’s strengths to help you grow

Your Child’s Temperament Finding God’s beauty in diversity: - He says we all are his masterpieces - He designed us to be interdependent - He gives us truth so we know how to relate to them & develop them - He offers us His forgiveness and Holy Spirit - He gives us His infinite love so we have abundance to give

Your Child’s Temperament Reading - Temperament & the Christian Faith O. Hallesby - Transformed Temperaments Tim La. Haye - How to Develop Your Child’s Temperament Beverly La. Haye - Parenting With Love and Logic Cline & Fay