Writing Wrongs Expressive Writing to Facilitate Forgiveness Catherine

Writing Wrongs: Expressive Writing to Facilitate Forgiveness Catherine R. Barber, Ph. D. School of Education barbercr@stthom. edu

Overview � What forgiveness is (and isn’t) � Benefits of forgiveness � Obstacles to forgiveness ◦ Rumination � Facilitating forgiveness � Expressive writing ◦ Empathy ◦ A “how to” primer

Then Peter approaching asked him, “Lord, if my brother sins against me, how often must I forgive him? As many as seven times? ” Jesus answered, “I say to you, not seven times but seventy-seven times…. ” Matthew 18: 21 -22 New American Bible

How Do Psychologists Define Forgiveness? � Lack of consensus! � Focus typically more on the intrapersonal than the interpersonal � Change in thoughts, feelings, and behaviors ◦ “Positive vs. Negative” Controversy � Unconditional vs. conditional

What Forgiveness Is Not � Denying � Excusing � Forgetting � Reconciliation?

To forgive is to set a prisoner free and discover the prisoner was you. -- Attributed to various sources.

Benefits � Psychological ◦ Anxiety ◦ Depression ◦ Relationship Satisfaction � Physical ◦ Mediator of the religiousness – health link ◦ Cardiovascular

Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much. -- Oscar Wilde

Obstacles to Forgiveness � Intent/Blameworthiness � Ongoing anger � Rumination

Facilitating Forgiveness � Apology (sometimes!) � Relationship factors � Empathy

What Is Expressive Writing? � Pennebaker paradigm ◦ “Deepest thoughts and feelings about an event” � Can be tailored to a specific situation � Small but robust effect sizes � Cognitive restructuring

Forgiveness-Based Expressive Writing � Published studies ◦ Romero (2008): empathy and benefit-finding ◦ Mc. Cullough et al. (2006): benefit-finding ◦ Stratton et al. (2008): general essay

Forgiveness-Based Expressive Writing � Recent projects ◦ Baylor Psychiatry Clinic data ◦ Veterans project

How to Start � Start with a single offense and a single offender. � Examine the pros and cons of forgiving vs. not forgiving this person. � Think about times when you have needed forgiveness. � Make the choice to forgive.

How to Start � Start with a written description of what happened, who did what to whom, etc. � Describe your thoughts and feelings about the person and the event. � Try to empathize with the one who hurt you. See the offender as a person. ◦ Note that this does not mean excusing the offender or suggesting that what happened wasn’t wrong.

How to Start � Keep practicing until you notice an increase in empathy and a decrease in hurt/anger. � Continue to commit to your choice to forgive. ◦ Forgiveness is rarely a one-time event in the case of more severe offenses. � Decide whether positive behaviors toward the other person might be helpful.

Participant Quotes � “I never realized how soothing writing could be. I have started writing in a journal almost every other day. It really organizes my thoughts. ” � “I wrote what I felt and [it] helped me to talk [with another person about the incident], because then I didn’t keep [my feelings] bottled up inside, which would in the end cause more pain. ”

Participant Quotes � “At first I saw [writing] as just doing this to get the [course] credits. After the two weeks when I had finished my journaling, I felt better about the person who hurt me…. It seems weird to say that some psychology graduate student research helped me work through a major problem in my life, but it did. I now see how valuable journaling is. ”

“Thank you for helping me bring closure to my past. ” -- Anonymous Participant

Conclusions � Forgiveness is a choice to reduce negative thoughts, feelings, and behaviors and (perhaps) replace them with positive ones. � Forgiveness has numerous psychological benefits, and increasing evidence points to physical benefits. � Expressive writing appears to be helpful for facilitating forgiveness.

References � � � � Braithwaite, S. R. , Selby, E. A. , & Fincham, F. D. (2011). Forgiveness and relationship satisfaction: Mediating mechanisms. Journal of Family Psychology, 25, 551 -559. Fehr, R. , Gelfand, M. J. , & Nag, M. (2010). The road to forgiveness: A meta-analytic synthesis of its situational and dispositional correlates. Psychological Bulletin, 136, 894 -914. Freedman, S. , & Chang, W. R. (2010). An Analysis of a Sample of the General Population’s Understanding of Forgiveness: Implications for Mental Health Counselors. Journal of Mental Health Counseling, 32, 5 -34. Frisina, P. G. , Borod, J. C. , & Lepore, S. J. (2004). A Meta-Analysis of the Effects of Written Emotional Disclosure on the Health Outcomes of Clinical Populations. Journal of Nervous & Mental Disease, 192, 629 -634. Harris, A. H. S. (2006). Does Expressive Writing Reduce Health Care Utilization? A Meta-Analysis of Randomized Trials. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 74, 243 -252. Lawler-Row, K. A. (2010). Forgiveness as a mediator of the religiosity – health relationship. Psychology of Religion and Spirituality, 2, 1 -16. Lawler-Row, K. A. , Karremans, J. C. , Scott, C. , Edlis-Matityahou, M. , & Edwards, L. (2008). Forgiveness, physiological reactivity and health: the role of anger. International Journal of Psychophysiology, 68, 51 -58.

References � � � � Luchies, L. B. , Finkel, E. J. , Mc. Nulty, J. K. , & Kumashiro, M. (2010). The doormat effect: When forgiving erodes self-respect and self-concept clarity. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 98, 734 -749. Mc. Cullough, M. E. , Root, L. M. , & Cohen, A. D. (2006). Writing about the benefits of an interpersonal transgression facilitates forgiveness. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 74, 887 -897. Pronk, T. M. , Karremans, J. C. , Overbeek, G. , Vermulst, A. A. , & Wigboldus, D. , A. , G. (2010). What it takes to forgive: When and why executive functioning facilitates forgiveness. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 98, 119 -131. Romero, C. (2008). Writing wrongs: An intervention to promote forgiveness. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 25, 625 -642. Stratton, S. P. , Dean, J. B. , Nonneman, A. J. , Bode, R. A. , & Worthington, E. L. Jr. (2008). Forgiveness interventions as spiritual development strategies: Comparing forgiveness workshop training, expressive writing about forgiveness, and retested controls. Journal of Psychology and Christianity, 27, 347 -357. Witvliet, C. V. O. , Ludwig, T. E. & Vander Laan, K. L. (2001). Granting forgiveness or harboring grudges: Implications for emotion, physiology, and health. Psychological Science, 121, 117 -123. Zechmeister, J. S. , Garcia, F. , Romero, C. , & Vas, S. N. (2004). Don’t apologize unless you mean it: An empirical investigation of determinants of forgiveness. Journal of Social and Clinical Psychology, 23, 532 -564.

Thank you! For a copy of the slides, please email me at barbercr@stthom. edu.