v Inter and Intrapersonal Skills Body language an

v. Inter and Intrapersonal Skills Body language : an important element Impact of Words, Tone of Voice and Body Language ü W: 7%, Tone : 38% Body Language : 55% ü Smile : does not Cost anything üShow appreciation üListen actively and reflectively: RASA q Receive, Appreciate & Acknowledge, Summarise and Ask üSupport team efforts : Put “We before I” üShow a sense of humour: q Be Sincere , Not Serious !

v. Recovering from difficult Interpersonal Situations Ø Apologise in person ØTime apologies carefully ØAssume responsibility ØCorrect mistakes ØBe patient- it is a great virtue and wins battles !

Ethical Framework for Interpersonal Communication Martin Buber, German philosopher stresses the importance of our attitude in setting the moral tone of our conversation : Two primary human attitudes or relationships : “I –It” and “I –Thou” I-It : treats others as objects: self centered and driven by only one’s needs I-Thou : ( I-You) relationships : treats others as unique human beings, focus on appreciating others perspectives

Ethical Framework for Interpersonal Communication Buber identifies three types of communication: ØMonologue : Self-Centered- eg: when meeting our emotional needs ØTechnical Dialogue : a neutral stance towards self and others-> focus on gathering and processing information-eg : sending and receiving information centered messages: clinical interactions ØDialogue : product of “I-Thou” relationship: focus on ‘understanding’ rather than being ‘understood’: Mindfulness(walking the narrow ridge), Effective Listening, Emotional Intelligence, Confirmation and Trust Building

Towards Effective Communication through use of the Six Thinking Hats-Edward Debano “ PARALLEL THINKING, DIVERGENT VIEWS’’ 5

Interpersonal Communication and Transactional Analysis § Key : Understanding us and others § John Holland , a Professor emeritus at Johns Hopkins University offers five personality types( product of genes, experience and conditioning) § The Realistic Type : structure, order, logic § The Investigative Type: observation & understanding § The Artistic Type : creative and non-conventional § The Social Type : Likes to inform , interact and engage with people § The Enterprising Type: persuasive, leadership traits , good at making others do what they conceive

Towards Ethical and Authentic Communications: The discipline of Building Character Ethical Decisions and Defining Moments Ethical Decisions: Choosing between two options one we know to be right and the other wrong Defining Moments: One which challenges us in a deeper way by asking us to choose between two or more ideals in which we deeply believe-such decisions rarely have one “correct” response-taken cumulatively over time, defining moments form our individual character

Case of Steve Lewis: a)clear about wanting to make a career in Investment Banking and become a Partner in the firm; b) wants to earn this position on merit c)Was willing to put up with the long and arduous work of a first year analyst to meet his larger career goals d) His Background: African-American

Issue : Steve Lewis-job in an investment banking firm in Manhattan Asked one day if he could fly to St. Loius, Missouri, eastern part of the US, in two days to help with a presentation to an important prospective client, a state treasurer who wants to see at least one black professional at the meeting or else no chance of being considered for the business deal , – a)What should Steve Lewis communicate to his boss?

an episode when his parents booked a reservation in a restaurant that did not serve blacks When they arrived the hostess told them there had been a mistake. . the reservation was lost and they could not be seated What does the mother do? . . Ømakes a new reservation in her maiden name( his father was a famous athlete whose name was widely recognised). . hostess books and is compelled to give a seat when they arrive Niccolo Machiavelli( ethical pragmatist), “Idealism untempered by realism often does little to improve the world”

Face Vase Perception is indeed a reality for each one of us ! Smart and Conscious Communication is all about making others receptive to our point of view In this illusion the figure and the ground are reversible in all ways

“ Trayvon Martin could have been me 35 years ago…” US President Barack Obama , in the aftermath of the controversial verdict of a Florida court acquitting the teenaged Martin’s alleged killer, which has sparked a new Communication debate on race relations in America impact is a

8 fold tips-Managing Self through Conscious Communication Ø Set an Example Ø Love What You Do Ø Discover the Self-Esteem ( avoid internalizing-a common malady) Ø Care For the People (benign care, duty v/s sanctity of work) Ø Duty v/s Rights Ø Sanctity of Work Ø Make People feel They are Understood Ø Personal Management ( recognise and manage your anger) Silent Prayer: Lord give me that composure, serenity and poise in dealing with situations objectively “May I have the Courage to change what I can; the strength to bea what I cannot and the wisdom to know the difference. . . ”