Transitioning to Parenthood Helping Parents Know What to

Transitioning to Parenthood Helping Parents Know What to Expect

Parenting Realities v Expectations Preparing Partner Nighttime Parenting Normal Newborn Behaviours- cries and cues Screen Time Bonding Time management Topics

Time Share Activity How many hours do you spend…… Birthing parent Partner Feeding baby Sleeping Holding baby Changing baby Bathing baby Eating

Realities vs Expectations Q: What and where do you learn about parenting? e. g. media, family, friends, health care providers, etc Parents have to make many decisions as soon as baby is born Parenting is a learn-as-you-go experience Expectation is that we can do it all disappointment if expectations are not met At the sacrifice of time with baby almost always Sleep routine is altered permanently- for a few years anyway It is not the baby’s job to help you sleep longer their life is instinctual in the beginning Self-care routines do change drastically- may not have time to do all the things they used to do, ie. Hair, nails, socializing, nights out at the bar however self-care remains important! Partner involvement looks different within culture groups Discussion about roles Mom will need help with simple tasks, dad, other family, friends can all help

Reality v Expectations Difference between facts and cultural expectations parents are overwhelmed baby’s sleep routines Cultural information, culture doesn’t always match facts The time it takes to care and nurture the baby Less spare time for the parent(s) Parents trying to get enough sleep Taking on household chores Recovering from birth- physically, emotionally Taking care of other family members

Realities vs Expectations cont’d Q: What have you heard about infant routines? Establishing routines is not necessary in the beginning Babies are able to communicate their needs- instinctual Spend your time observing your babies cues and patterns can change each day Breastfeeding is not just a feeding method, it is a relationship You will find that you are sitting with your new baby a lot- NORMAL Meeting your basic necessities may be all you can do ie. , bathe, eat, sleep Dads need the opportunity to learn how to parent mom has had 9 m to bond, with dad often happens at the birth, or shortly after- SKINTO-SKIN.

Preparing partner Q: what do you think the partners role is after the baby is born? Protector of the Dyad ie. Limiting visitors being the one to communicate with others Ensuring mom feels safe enough to breastfeed Being positive toward mom positive reinforcement Encouragement you look beautiful feeding our baby, making our baby good and strong…. .

Preparing Partner cont’d Taking over when needed such as holding/ wearing (sts) baby cooking meal prep bathing baby diapers Everyone, including partner will be tired May need to make temporary adjustments to sleep environment Learning curve for partner to find comfort level while caring for the baby Communication will be key Partners may not know what diving right in looks like Have realistic expectations- there may be a knowledge deficit that you are unaware off Keep it light and humorous as much as possible When dad is confident and mom is trusting, it makes for a smoother adjustment

Nighttime Parenting doesn’t end when the sun goes down Q: what have you heard about nighttime parenting Nighttime parenting isn't a set of sleep strategies, it's a relationship. What parents try: Props Sleep training Weighted blankets/ sleepers----- RISK OF SIDS Swaddling Overfeeding as a way to get babies to sleep longer Formula feeding Reality: Important to understand it is about (creating) a healthy sleep environment; dim lights, sleepy music vs routine Need to be soothed Important to remember baby will be leading, important to follow their cues, hunger, satiation, sleep, etc. Natural biorhythm

Normal Newborn Behaviours- Cries and Cues Baby cues video-https: //www. healthyfamiliesbc. ca/home/articles/video-about-baby-feeding-cues-and -behaviours Sleeping cues video- https: //www. youtube. com/watch? v=h 4 f-OHm 2 Oi 8 Rolling of the eyes Limp/ relaxed body Rubbing eyes suck a finger Fussiness Overstimulated Gassy tummy- video-https: //www. youtube. com/watch? v=g. Aup. Fs 8 Kwts Signs of being unwell video- https: //www. youtube. com/watch? v=Wg-k-Bl. G 0 r 0

Normal Newborn Behaviours, Cues and Cries cont’d Stress signs video-https: //www. youtube. com/watch? v=PWXOFb. Rro 5 g Stiff body, hands up by face Rapid breathing Eyes widen Stimulate reflexes May not respond right away to comfort Heightened breathing De-escalation/ calming is important, patience

Screen time Same for an adults, children/ babies Eye Contact Baby may be looking at the parent, while parent is on the screen Not giving attention babies need At first there are many skills that need practicing Role model What example do you want to set? Technology is so pervasive (used to help teach, growth and development) set up limits and boundaries can interfere with learning, focus, school readiness lead to physical health issues, like obesity, asthma, sedentary behaviour Interferes with bed time/ napping routines An increased incident of screen time means we have to be especially mindful of making screen-free time Be present with your baby- staying off your phone may help you with this cues and cries may be missed as we have lost that natural focus and observation of baby Pick your time to get electronic tasks done when baby is not around We may be physically present, not emotionally connecting we are distracted by screens

What entails good parenting? BONDING Is about the physical, emotional, social support that provides the foundation for bonding and attachment To have skill sets to achieve goals to help you to parent confidently Focusing on the kind of child you want to have Helps you develop your parenting style Meeting the baby/child’s needs Parenting is the right balance of maintaining the health of baby and parent(s)

Bonding 1. Bonding the establishment of a relationship or link with someone based on shared feelings, interests, or experiences. "we were friendly to each other, but there was no bonding" 2. the action of joining things securely by means of adhesive, heat, or pressure or by chemical bonds. "the bonding of metals to non-metals" BUILDING the laying of bricks in an overlapping pattern so as to form a strong structure. "the bonding of the brickwork would have to be altered during construction to allow a window to be inserted" 3. the placement of dutiable goods in bond. "they want the introduction of bonding to guarantee that consignments will be properly handled" adjective: bonding 1. having the function of joining things securely, especially by means of an adhesive substance, heat, or pressure. "a bonding agent" 2. having the function or effect of establishing a relationship or link with someone based on shared feelings, interests, or experiences. "it's bonding to sing together"

Bonding Parenting is about maintaining the right balance of health for mom and baby Encompasses birth to 6 years old a pathway that allows you to help them to achieve their goals, supports children’s likes and dislikes, helps with routine invest now for the long term; when bonding is disrupted parents need to work harder to re-establish the bond Think about your parenting style before baby comes- parents may have different styles, communicating will be key as differences arise Breastfeeding promotes bonding- cuts down your work as they grow and develop- not having to seek out opportunities to bond Stuff that interferes with bonding swings, vtech toys rockers video camera crib attachments Clothing- sleepers, sleep sac (don’t wake naturally) Swaddling cloths Learn what is NORMal The baby can never be too attached!!

Time management Creating routines that make sense for your family Includes the basics: rest , bathing, eating healthy What tasks can partner take on If older, engaging other children to help with age appropriate tasks- whole family needs to get to know baby! Limit visits- in person, virtual Ask for help-even if this is not something your used to this is the time to make yours and baby’s needs aware Household chores Prioritize the need; what’s most important? May be on a day to day basis No day is going to look the same as the other Babies do not have a routine or a schedule spend your time learning your baby’s cues Follow your own cues- are you tired? Are you hungry? Are you thirsty? Emotional?

Still Face Experiment https: //www. youtube. com/watch? v=apz. XGEb. Zht 0

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