The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People Stephen

The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People Stephen R. Covey 1989, Simon Schuster, New York, NY ISBN 0 -671 -70863 -5 Jeff Offutt http: //www. cs. gmu. edu/~offutt/ SWE 205 Software Usability and Design

The Book • Sold over 15 million copies in 38 languages • Thousands of people claim this book has changed their lives / careers • The advice applies to all facets of life – careers, school, families, friendship, … • Most of us are naturally (or already) good at some of these – But most have problems with others – (My main problem is Habit 3 … I will always struggle) https: //www. stephencovey. com/7 habits-habit 1. php 02 -Dec-20 © Jeff Offutt 2

Abundance Mentality A belief that there are enough resources and success to share with others • This is common among optimistic people • Common in people with high self worth and security • Leads to sharing profits, recognition and responsibility Contrasts with Scarcity Mentality Given a finite amount of resources, a person must hoard belongings and protect them from others • Pessimistic people, low self worth, insecurity • Selfish, anti-social behavior 02 -Dec-20 © Jeff Offutt 3

Which Direction? Outside In • If we act like we are successful, then we will become successful – Or good, or nice, or moral, or … Inside Out • If we are successful, then we will start to act like we are • Or good, or nice, or moral, or … 02 -Dec-20 © Jeff Offutt 4

The 7 Habits 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. Moving from Dependence to Be Proactive Independence Begin with the End in Mind Put First Things First Interdependence Think Win / Win Seek First to Understand, then to be Understood Synergize Self-Rejuvenation 7. Sharpen the Saw 02 -Dec-20 © Jeff Offutt 5

1. Be Proactive Stimulus reactiv e Response Choose Self. Awarenes s Independe nt Will Imaginatio n 02 -Dec-20 Conscienc e © Jeff Offutt 6

1. Proactive Language Lessons Reactive There’s nothing I can do. That’s just the way I am. He makes me so mad. They won’t allow that. I can’t … I must … If only … 02 -Dec-20 Proactive Let’s look at our choices. I can choose a different approach. I control my own feelings. I can create an effective presentation. I will choose an appropriate response. I choose … I prefer … I will … © Jeff Offutt 7

1. Bring Proactive Don’t mind criticism. . . – If it is untrue, disregard it – If it is unfair, don’t let it irritate you – If it is ignorant, smile – If it is justified, learn from it 02 -Dec-20 © Jeff Offutt 8

2. Begin with the End in Mind • Many people drift through life, reacting to what comes • Setting goals allows us to proactively choose the directions we take • Many disagreements are about issues that are not related to our goals – And we often share the same goal ! • At least half of our faculty meetings are spent on things that do not contribute to our goals – Pure excise 02 -Dec-20 © Jeff Offutt 9

2. What is the End ? • • • What is your goal for this hour ? What is your goal today ? What is your goal this semester ? What is your goal for finishing college ? What is your goal for after college ? Everybody should always have at least 2 plans : – Where do you want to be in 5 years ? – In 10 years ? 02 -Dec-20 © Jeff Offutt 10

2. Personal Mission Statement Security W i s d o m Who are you? What do you want? Power 02 -Dec-20 © Jeff Offutt G u i d a n c e 11

3. Put First Things First Important Urgen t deadlines 1 caring for family homework 3 phone text messages 02 -Dec-20 meeting s © Jeff Offutt 2 building relationships Get here! planning interruptions most email reading texts prevention crises exams Not Important Not Urgen t trivia teaching children computer games unproductiv e activities 4 social media things that do not help realize a goal 12

5 -minute Thinking Time • Do you have an abundant or scarcity mentality? • Are you proactive ? • Are you goal-directed ? • Do you do a good job prioritizing your activities ? 02 -Dec-20 © Jeff Offutt 13

The 7 Habits 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 02 -Dec-20 Moving from Dependence to Be Proactive. Independence Begin with the End in Mind Put First Things First Interdependence Think Win / Win Seek First to Understand, then be Understood Synergize. Self-Rejuvenation Sharpen the Saw © Jeff Offutt 14

Paradigms of Interdependence The Emotional Bank Account When we meet a new person, we establish a neutral “emotional” bank account … and our interactions include withdrawals and deposits … largely based on trust 1. Understand the other person 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 02 -Dec-20 Attend to the little things Keep commitments Clarify expectations Show personal integrity Respect the laws of love and the laws of life © Jeff Offutt 15

4. Think Win / Win High Lose Win Lose Win Consideration Low 02 -Dec-20

4. Reaching Win / Win • Three essential character traits : 1. Integrity : Sticking with your true feelings, values and commitments 2. Maturity : Expressing your ideas and feelings with courage and consideration for others 3. Abundance Mentality : Believing there is plenty for everyone • Many people think in zero-sum terms : Either you’re nice or strong 02 -Dec-20 – To reach win/win, you must be both — balanced – You must also be confident and empathetic – Considerate and brave © Jeff Offutt 17

5. Understand. Then be Understood. Do more than hear – listen Do more than listen – understand Do more than think – ponder Do more than talk – say something • Instead of thinking of your next words, listen ! • The following is not listening: – Judging then agreeing or disagreeing … Evaluating – Asking questions from your perspective … Probing – Giving counsel, advice and solutions … Advising – Analyzing motives Interpreting Once you others’ understand …… then you have the information you need to be understood 02 -Dec-20 © Jeff Offutt 18

6. Synergize The whole is greater than the sum of the parts High Synergistic (Win / Win) Respectful (compromise) Trust Low 02 -Dec-20 Defensive (Win / Lose or Lose / Win) Low Cooperation © Jeff Offutt High 19

The 7 Habits 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 02 -Dec-20 Moving from Dependence to Be Proactive. Independence Begin with the End in Mind Put First Things First Interdependence Think Win / Win Seek First to Understand, then be Understood Synergize. Self-Rejuvenation Sharpen the Saw © Jeff Offutt 20

7. Sharpen the Saw Hea lthy more people a re effec tive Mental re ad pl an wr ite r the o f y and c s i. TV mind rcise. exe s i g in Read 02 -Dec-20 Physical exercise eat well sleep Balance Spiritual clarify values be alone think deep thoughts © Jeff Offutt Social make friends help others be a good citizen This is i mportan t / not urgent This is p roactive ! 21

The 7 Habits 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. Be Proactive Begin with the End in Mind Put First Things First Think Win / Win Seek First to Understand, then to be Understood 6. Synergize 7. Sharpen the Saw Of Highly Effective People 02 -Dec-20 © Jeff Offutt 22

Assignment 10 • Turn in Covey’s seven habits in three lists 1. Habits I’m already good at 2. Habits I’m getting better at 3. Habits I’m really bad at • Submit written on one sheet of paper • This is personal; we won’t share these with the class • The purpose is for you to think about these ideas – And to help you plan for your future 02 -Dec-20 © Jeff Offutt 23