Teens and Siblings Siblings Brother and sisters in

Teens and Siblings

Siblings • Brother and sisters in a family. • Can be the best of friends or the worst of enemies. • Why would this be true? Give some examples.

Sibling Rivalry • Competition between brothers and sisters. • Usually created by jealous feelings as they compete for their parents’ love and attention, or other things.

Supportive Sibling Behavior • Any action that helps or encourages a sibling. • Can take place in the home or outside the home. • Give some examples.

Birth Order • The role a child plays in the home is greatly influenced by his/her birth order. • This role can also be transferred to school and peer groups. • What birth order are you? See which category best fits you.

Birth Order Quiz Category A • Manipulative • Charming • Usually gets his/her way • Blames others for things that happen witty • • A show-off Loves people Good salesperson Draws favorable attention

Birth Order Quiz Category B • • • Perfectionist Reliable Makes lists Conscientious Well-organized • • Serious Critical Does well in school Usually neat and tidy

Birth Order Quiz Category C • Acts as a go-between • Extremely loyal to in family conflicts peer group (gets mad if parents • Has the fewest criticize friends) pictures in the family photo album • Seems to do things differently than the • Avoids conflict rest of the family • Has many friends • Independent

Birth Order Quiz Results • Every word in these descriptions may not be exactly as you are, but you are to choose the one that fits the best. • Category A: Youngest • Category B: Oldest • Category C: Middle

Birth Order Characteristics First Born or Only Child • • • Guinea pigs Perfectionists Reliable Conscientious List makers Well-organized Critical Scholarly Loyal Serious Goal-oriented People pleasers Conservative Supporters of law and order • Believers in authority and ritual • Legalistic • Self-reliant • • •

Birth Order Characteristics Middle Born Independent Loyal to peer group Many friends Usually leave home first • Find companionship outside the home • Feels left out of their own family • Run with the pack • • • Avoid conflict • Least number of pictures in family albums • Prone to embarrassment, but won’t admit it • Secretive • Last to see professional help

Birth Order Characteristics Last Born • • Manipulative Charming Blame others Shows off People persons Good salespersons Precocious Engaging • Messy class clowns • Love limelight • Personable manipulators • Affectionate • Absentminded • Carefree • Not taken seriously

Your Teacher’s Birth Order • Now that you have a little background on birth order characteristics, what birth order do you think your teacher is? • How about these teachers? – Mrs. Smith – Mr. Blackham – Mr. Zobell – Ms. Mitchell

Making Your Birth Order Work for You • The following slides have some suggestions for making your birth order work in your best interest. • People who are wise learn to make their birth order work for them and to their advantage.

Tips for the Oldest Child • Don’t overextend yourself • Learn to say no—you can’t do everything • Don’t expect so much from yourself. You don’t have to be perfect. • Don’t be afraid of being a detail person. • Take problem solving step-by-step

Tips for the Oldest Child • Don’t let others pressure you into making decisions. Take your time. • Try to develop a sense of humor and laugh at your mistakes. • Never apologize for being conscientious or over organized.

Tips for the Middle Child • Use your people skills to see both sides of issues and deal with life as it really is. • If you are a free spirit, fight to keep your unique qualities. • Middle children grow up thinking that no one ever listened to them and they never had a chance to express their ideas. Share your ideas!

Tips for the Middle Child • Enjoy your many friends, but don’t spread yourself too thin. • Don’t compare yourself to others—just be you! • Don’t think only firstborns are leaders; you understand, negotiate, and compromise. Try being a leader!

Tips for the Youngest Child • Accept responsibility for yourself! • Many lastborns are messy; learn to pick up after yourself. • Choose jobs where you interact with people because you will do well! • Be less self-centered and offer to help others.

Tips for the Youngest Child • Don’t blame others if you’re the one who really caused the situation. • Your gift of humor will be an asset; use it correctly. Don’t be a carrot seeker. • Give others a chance to share the limelight. Concentrate on asking others about them! • Lastborns tend to be the most compatible.

Sibling Research Project • We are going to conduct a sibling research project on our class. • Fill out the sibling rivalry research questionnaire. • Now we are going to tally the results.

Tally our Results • Split into 4 groups • Group one: – Examine results from questions 1 -5 • Group two: – Examine results from questions 6 -10 • Group three: – Examine results from questions 11 -15 • Group four: – Examine results from questions 16 -19

Analyze our Results • Have each group report their findings to the teacher. The teacher will then tally all of the information onto one sheet of paper. • Homework Assignment: Take home a copy of the sibling rivalry student survey results sheet and answer the questions on the sibling rivalry student reaction form. This will be due next class period.

Summary • Living with siblings is not always easy, but your siblings will always be part of your life and they can be good friends. • It is in the best interest of the family to understand sibling interaction and sibling dynamics in order to contribute to good relationships.