STAGES IN RELATIONSHIP BUILDING JOSEPH A DEVITO Communications

STAGES IN RELATIONSHIP BUILDING

JOSEPH A. DEVITO • Communications researcher • Theory of relationship development • 6 stages in forming relationships

CONTACT First step is to become aware of the other person • Perceptual contact • Becomes aware of other (visually) • Can be mutual or personal • Interactional contact • Small talk ( how's the weather) • Initial assessment • Categorizing • Shema

Contact Involvement

INVOLVEMENT Forming friendship • Mutually • Deeper discourse • Deeper in the “onion” • Liking phase • Testing • Test other to see how committed they are

Involvement Intimacy

INTIMACY Deeper relationships, fully committed and devoted • Personal • Individuals full commitment ( problem if on sided) • Interpersonal • Defining the relationship ( good friends, intimate relationships etc) • Social Bonding • Going public (single into relationship status, marriage, best friends etc ) • Anxiety • Security: will they leave me? • Fulfillment: will closeness continue ? • Excitement: will it get boring?

Intimacy Deterioration

DETERIORATION Relationships will face problems • Relational damage • Different factors will harm relationship • Broken promise, arguments, cheating etc. • Weakening bonds • Relationship starts fading • Less time for relationships

deterioration Repair Dissolution

REPAIR Fixing the relationship • Intrapersonal repair • Self Critical reflection • What “I” can do to fix it • Interpersonal repair • Critical reflection of both • What “we” can do to fix it

DISSOLUTION Relationships fall apart or return to a basic stage ( platonic) • Intrapersonal separation • We distance ourselves as individuals • Become “I” than “we” • Interpersonal separation • Physical and psychological separation • Break up • Social separation • Going from “ in a relationship” to “single” • Publicly show its done.