SOCIOEMOTIONAL DEVELOPMENT IN EARLY ADULTHOOD CH 14 LECTURE

SOCIOEMOTIONAL DEVELOPMENT IN EARLY ADULTHOOD CH: 14 LECTURE PREPARED BY: DR. M. SAWHNEY

Topics to discuss �Stability and change from childhood to adulthood �Attraction, love, and close relationships �Adult lifestyles �Marriage and the family

Temperament �Easy and difficult temperaments: �Boys less likely to continue education �Girls more likely to experience marital conflict �Inhibition �Less assertive and difficulty experiencing social support. �Ability to control one’s emotions: �Positively correlated with resilience

Childhood Attachment and Adult Romantic Relationships Attachment History Secure Working Model comfortable with intimacy; positive views of relationships Avoidant Hesitant in getting involved in relationship; distant themselves Resistant Jealous; less trusting; demand closeness

Attraction, Love and Close Relationship � Attraction depends on: • Familiarity and Similarity • Consensual validation � Online matchmaking � Problems with online matchmaking? � https: //www. youtube. com/wat ch? v=p. ASy 97 lnsqc � Physical Attractiveness: How important is physical attractiveness in relationships? � Matching hypothesis

The Faces of Love • Intimacy �Erikson - Intimacy vs. isolation �Intimacy is finding oneself while losing oneself in another person �Failure to achieve intimacy results in social isolation �https: //www. youtube. com/watch? v=Pn. SHJmk 0 mu. I �Intimacy and independence �Balance between intimacy and commitment, and independence and freedom

Friendship • Gender differences in friendships • Women have more close friends • Men friendships are more distant and competitive • Romantic Love: Passionate love • Affectionate love • Consummate Love

Strenberg’s Love Triangle

Falling Out of Love…. • Ending a close relationship may be wise if: �You are obsessed with a person who repeatedly betrays your trust �You are involved with someone who is draining you emotionally or financially or both �You are desperately in love with someone who does not return your feelings

Adult Lifestyle � Single adults • Proportion of individuals 25 to 34 yrs. Of age, never been married has exceeded those who were married (U. S. Census Bureau, 2010). • Stereotypes associated with being single range from: �“Swinging single” to the “desperately lonely, suicidal” single • Common problems �Forming intimate relationships with other adults �Confronting loneliness �Finding a place in a society that is marriage-oriented

Cohabitation � Living together in a sexual relationship without being married. � More than 60 percent cohabit before they get married. � Reasons for cohabiting � Does cohabiting help the chances of marriage? � https: //www. youtube. com/watch? v=Ca 4 J 5 F 3 M 35 M � Why is cohabiting linked with divorce?

Married Adults • Marital trends �Marriage rates in the U. S. have declined in recent years �In 2011, the U. S. average for a first marriage climbed to 28. 7 years for men and 26. 5 years for women �Marriage in adolescence is more likely to end in divorce

Cross Cultural Comparisons Aspects of marriage vary across cultures �In China, law sets minimum marriage for males and females. �Domesticity is valued in some cultures but not others �Religion plays an important role in many cultures

Cross Cultural Comparison The Importance of Various Traits in Mate Selection Throughout the World Source: Based on Hatfield & Rapson (2005)

Arranged Marriage � Romantic love may not be a basis for marriage for all cultures � Arranged marriages are an alliance between families with love developing after marriage • Commitment first and attachment second � Many traditional cultures are shifting from “arranged” to semi arranged

Divorced Adults � Stabilized since 1980 s � Factors for divorce • Background factors • Major problems � Most common times: fifth to tenth year of marriage � Consequences of divorce

Gay and Lesbian Adults • Are similar to heterosexual relationships in satisfactions and conflicts � May build “families of choice” • Misconceptions: �Masculine/feminine roles are relatively uncommon �Small segment of the gay male population has a large number of sexual partners �Gay male couples have an open relationship while lesbian couples usually do not �Stigma a major concern �http: //www. cbsnews. com/news/gay-studentsdeath-highlights-troubling-trend/

� Marriage and Family Making marriage work (Gottman, 2011) • 7 principles of a working marriage �Establishing love maps �Nurturing fondness and admiration �Turning toward each other instead of away �Letting your partner influence you �Solving solvable conflicts �Overcoming gridlock �Creating shared meaning

Becoming a Parent • Parenting myths and reality: �The birth of a child will save a failing marriage �The child will think, feel, and behave like the parents did in their childhood �Having a child gives the parents a “second chance” at achievement �Parenting is an instinct and requires no training

Trends in Childbearing � � Delay having first child Decline in family size: U. S. average of 2. 1 children per woman • Trends in childbearing �Fewer children result in women having more time to do other things. �Men are apt to invest a greater amount of time in fathering �Parental care is often supplemented by institutional care �Advantages of having children early/late

Dealing with Divorce �The Enhancers �The good-enoughs �The Seekers �The Libertines �The Competent Loners �The Defeated