Shelley Lang 1 Why Shelley Lang by Shelley

Shelley Lang 1

Why Shelley Lang by Shelley Lang? n n I know, the title of this presentation is also the name of the author To explain the reason why this is so would take many millennia, so to make a long story short, my previous computing assignments were also on me 2

Reason You’re Here Today n n n If you are present for this presentation, you must be here to learn more about me, Shelley Lynne Joan Lang This presentation will cover the basics of my life, as well as offer important advice There will be free cookies once the presentation is complete, and not before! 3

When I was Just a Little Girl… n n n I grew up with three other siblings in the Walkerton area I spent a lot of time reading and singing songs about eating worms and socks Moral of these years: singing songs about eating worms and washing socks will make you more attractive to both worms and socks 4

I Asked my Mother… n n n I spent most of my adolescence watching Monty Python and trying to be funny to adults I learned the ups and downs of calculus Moral of the Slide: Calculus is the devil! It will take you so high, then drop you back to the earth! 5

Clipart Example n n n Nowadays I spend my time doing computer projects for my Computing class I also look out for bricks that may trip me up on Wineguard Walk Moral of the Story: Someone, for the love of God, please repair Wineguard Walk! I chipped a tooth last week! 6

Real Life n n n I know you’re wondering how YOU can use this newfound knowledge that I have given you Well, studies show that nine out of ten dwarves and German people will be highly attracted to you if you act like me I know you’re situation seems hopeless, but keep at it, and eventually you’ll have all the Germans and Dwarves you could ever wish for 7

What This Means To You § Personally, I know you can do it. Well, one third of you can, because studies show that only one third of participants actually act like me § So, to be one of those in the one third category, remember to sing silly songs, have a love/hate relationship with calculus, and PLEASE repair Wineguard! 8

Next Steps n n n Go to Guide Camp and learn ridiculous songs Really get to know calculus, and then drop it from a ten story building. Twice. To make sure that it’s dead I’ll sit here and twiddle my thumbs until one third of you come back successful next year 9

Have A Good Summer! n Or else…. 10