SelfCare Within Leadership The Concept of SelfCare for

Self-Care Within Leadership The Concept of Self-Care for the Leader David Cole Waymark Ministries

Waymark Ministries: The message of Christ for spiritual seekers With teachings based on the ancient 'Celtic' church, and the Christian contemplative and mystic tradition Waymark Ministries offers retreats, workshops and local events, as well as online courses and one to one life guidance. www. waymarkministries. com

Self-care can often be very low on the priority list of leaders, if it ever appears at all. What many leaders fail to recognise as an intrinsic aspect of active Christian ministry is that they themselves are as equally important as those they are ‘supposed to be’ caring for, or are paid to care for.

The following section is from chapter 2, Longing for God, in The Mystic Path of Meditation – beginning a Christ centred journey

I looked to see if there was any pattern in these folks’ experience. There was. All those who felt “burned out”—or on the edge of that state of collapse—were those who never took time out from their busy lives to simply be with God. Instead, they were always on the go, constantly trying to squeeze more into a twenty-four-hour day. Meanwhile, all those who were able to ride the flow of life took time to be alone and quiet with God.

We can easily get to a point of burn out if we do not begin our active ministry by placing times for ourselves into our regular (at least weekly) diary. This is not wasting time, this is deliberately doing nothing, deliberately putting time out to just be with God. This is also following the example of Jesus.

Read Luke 5 v 1 -3 & 12 -16 .

One day as Jesus was preaching on the shore of the Sea of Galilee, great crowds pressed in on him to listen to the word of God. 2 He noticed two empty boats at the water’s edge, for the fishermen had left them and were washing their nets. 3 Stepping into one of the boats, Jesus asked Simon, its owner, to push it out into the water. So he sat in the boat and taught the crowds from there. . . 12 In one of the villages, Jesus met a man with an advanced case of leprosy. When the man saw Jesus, he bowed with his face to the ground, begging to be healed. “Lord, ” he said, “if you are willing, you can heal me and make me clean. ” 13 Jesus reached out and touched him. “I am willing, ” he said. “Be healed!” And instantly the leprosy disappeared. 14 Then Jesus instructed him not to tell anyone what had happened. He said, “Go to the priest and let him examine you. Take along the offering required in the law of Moses for those who have been healed of leprosy. This will be a public testimony that you have been cleansed. ” 15 But despite Jesus’ instructions, the report of his power spread even faster, and vast crowds came to hear him preach and to be healed of their diseases. 16 But Jesus often withdrew to the wilderness for prayer.

• What are the similarities between what is going on in these two sections (v 1 -2 & v 12 -15)? • What are the differences between these two aspects of Jesus’ ministry in these two sections? • In what ways did Jesus differ in how he responded to the demand on his time and ministry (v 3 & v 16)? • What do these two differing ways in which Jesus responded teach us about how we might react and respond within our own ministries? • What does the word ‘ often ’ from v 16 tell us about Jesus’ practice described in this verse?

Define the following: 1. Christian Meditation 2. Contemplative Prayer 3. Christian Mindfulness

Read and discuss the following quotes: “The contemplative tradition of the Christian faith comes to us as a precious gift in an age when no one has time to sit still…[itis] to be present and receptive to what God brings us in life instead of hurriedly striving towards the next task or project…Contemplative youth ministry [is] an opening of the heart, an attentiveness to God, a receptivity to the Holy Spirit, a growing relationship with Jesus and his way of compassion…[it is] to listen as well as teach…to grow our ministries in prayer…” Mark Yaconelli. Contemplative Youth Ministry

Read and discuss the following quotes: “It would be a mistake to think of Centring (contemplative) Prayer as a mere rest period or a period of relaxation, although it sometimes provides these things. Neither is it a journey to bliss. You might find some bliss along the way, but you will also have to endure the wear and tear of the discipline of cultivating interior silence. ” Fr. Thomas Keating. Centring Prayer in daily life and ministry

Read and discuss the following quotes: “If God is to speak his word in the soul, she [the soul] must be at rest and at peace, and then he will speak his word, and himself, in the soul. ” Meister Eckhart. The Complete Mystical Works - Sermon One (Walshe Trans. )

Read and discuss the following quotes: “…anotherepithet has served to illustrate the spirituality of the [Dominican] Order and its members: ‘Contemplata aliis Tradere’, to hand on to others what has been contemplated…this phrase is meant not to distinguish the mystical, contemplative dimension of Dominican spirituality from its active expression, but to unite them…[It is] contemplation expressed in active ministry. ” Richard Woods. Mysticism and Prophecy – the Dominican tradition

Self-care must be on the priority list for every leader. If done properly this will inevitably include some kind of Christian meditation and/or mindfulness, and contemplative prayer.

Church History and Self-Care A chronological look at 15 people from our Christian heritage in the contemplative tradition who have embodied and/or taught the importance of what we might term as ‘self-care for the leader’ as expanded and explained previously in The Concept Care for the Leader. of Self-

Church History and Self-Care St Benedict (5 thc. ) Monastic Rule, chapter 48 - Balance, proportion, harmony are so central, they so underpin everything else in the Rule, that without them the whole Benedictine approach to the individual and to the community loses its keystone. This is something which speaks to us very immediately [today]. Esther de Waal. Seeking God – the way of St Benedict

Church History and Self-Care St Benedict (5 thc. ) Monastic Rule, chapter 48 - Balance . . . the idea of order and balance runs through the organisation of the monastery. ‘So that everything may be done at a proper time (47. 1); ‘everyone is to keep to his regular place’ (2. 19). . . The Rule is to create the favourable environment in which the balanced life may flourish Esther de Waal. Seeking God – the way of St Benedict

Church History and Self-Care St Benedict (5 thc. ) . . . we need to remind ourselves of this very basic and very modest fact, that we are essentially rhythmic creatures, and that life needs this rhythm and balance if it is to be consistently good and not drain from us the precious possibility of being or becoming our whole selves. Unless we take this seriously we are going to reduce the amount of ourselves that is actually there and available to us. We will live with less and less of our whole selves Esther de Waal. Seeking God – the way of St Benedict

Church History and Self-Care St Benedict (5 thc. ) Monastic Rule, chapter 48 - Balance Benedict saw the wisdom of a balance between body, mind, and soul. . . The daily rhythm of life in the monastery is a reminder of this. Though monks can be very busy, theirs is not a “busy-ness. ” There is a balance to the day that maintains proper perspective. We need this to keep us from serving possessions, egos, jobs, and all other wonderful things that easily become idols that demand our all Dennis Okholm. Monk Habits for Everyday People – Benedictine Spirituality for Protestants

Church History and Self-Care St Benedict (5 thc. ) Monastic Rule, chapter 48 - Balance The non monastic Christian worker can do something of the same sort. . . [the rhythm] throughout the work day recenters us and reminds us what our daily work is all about. . . Balance. . . helps For instance. . . all keep us from prideful temptations. of us have been guilty of. . . the comeback “you think YOU’RE busy!? ”. . . [though] putting our work in perspective like this doesn’t undermine its significance. Dennis Okholm. Monk Habits for Everyday People – Benedictine Spirituality for Protestants

Church History and Self-Care Cuthbert of Lindisfarne (7 thc. ) Rhythm of Life (of the island of Lindisfarne) It was good when the tide came in and the island became truly itself. There was something deep to learn from the rhythm of the tides. There is a time when contact and activity is right and necessary, but there is also a time for stillness and silence. We need to be in the throng of things, but we all need our own island of peace and renewal. David Adam. Fire in the North – The Life of St Cuthbert

Church History and Self-Care Cuthbert of Lindisfarne (7 thc. ) Rhythm of Life Cuthbert had to admit that life was becoming too busy for him. He was not giving enough attention to his Lord and Master. He wanted more time to be with God. The little island of Hobthrush was too near the monastery, and he was forever being disturbed by visitors. . . At last he obtained permission. . . to leave and go to Inner Farne. This island was some miles away to the southeast and surrounded on all sides by surging seas. David Adam. Fire in the North – The Life of St Cuthbert

Church History and Self-Care Francis of Assisi (13 thc. ) Francis built churches (literally); helped the poor; he and his followers were ‘friars’ not ‘monks’; & he spent time dwelling in caves and in the desert in contemplation. See: G. K. Chesterton. St Francis of Assisi; & Omer Englebert. St Francis of Assisi – A Biography

Church History and Self-Care Meister Eckhart (14 thc. ) ‘Contemplata aliis Tradere’ to hand on to others what has been contemplated

Church History and Self-Care Meister Eckhart (14 thc. ) Referring to the difference between the activity of Martha and the stillness of Mary in Luke 10, Eckhart says ‘Therefore our Lord says to Martha “unum est neceaarium”, which is as much to say, ‘Martha, he who would be serene and pure needs but one thing: detachment. ’ Meister Eckhart. On Detachment (in) The Complete Mystical Works of Meister Eckhart. Walshe Trans.

Church History and Self-Care Meister Eckhart (14 thc. ) In the Middle Ages. . . contemplation thinking but awareness. . . but conveyed, rather, did not imply a lack of a sense under Eckhart. . . the sense of sustained of non-discursive awareness of the presence of God [balances with the] sustained reasoning about God. Eckhart’s notion most closely resembles, perhaps, the Buddhist concept of mindfulness Richard Woods. Meister Eckhart – Master of Mystics

Church History and Self-Care Thomas A Kempis (14 th/15 thc. ) We might enjoy much peace, if we would not busy ourselves with the words and deeds of other men. . . How can he abide long in peace who thrusts himself into the cares of others. . . Why were some of the Saints so perfect and contemplative? Because they laboured to mortify themselves wholly to all earthly desires. . . we are too much led by our passions, transitory things and too solicitous for

Church History and Self-Care Thomas A Kempis (14 th/15 thc. ) Seek a convenient time of leisure for yourself, and meditate often upon God’s loving-kindness. . . in silence and in stillness a religious soul advantages itself and learns [Divine] mysteries. Thomas A Kempis. Of the Imitation of Christ

Church History and Self-Care Ignatius of Loyola(16 thc. ) Famous for teaching: Examen; Spiritual Exercises; Preparation & conclusion of the heart in all things, particularly prayer See: The Spiritual Exercises of St Ignatius of Loyola .

Church History and Self-Care Teresa of Avila(16 thc. ) 9 Grades of prayer: 1. Vocal – using words to express our heart, spontaneous or prescribed 2. Meditation – focused discursive prayer 3. Affective – moving meditation from head to heart 4. Acquired Recollection – loving thoughtless gaze upon an object – dividing line between ascetical and mystical prayer 5. Infused Contemplation – beginning of mystical prayer, that is, Divinely experiential prayer in the mind

Church History and Self-Care Teresa of Avila(16 thc. ) 9 Grades of prayer: 6. Prayer of Quiet – deepening the experiential prayer from mind to will 7. Prayer of Union – all interior faculties become absorbed into the Divine light 8. Spiritual Betrothal – Divine light captures the soul’s external senses. 9. Spiritual Marriage – a total absorption of the soul into God. Although the distinction between Creator and creature identification with Divine love has taken place. remains. . . a complete

Church History and Self-Care Teresa of Avila(16 thc. ) These grades of prayer make up the journey of the Interior Castle, from the outside to the centre, and include the classic stages of inner transformation – • purgation (1 -4), • illumination (5 -6) and • unification (7 -9)

Church History and Self-Care Brother Lawrence(17 thc. ) The practice of the presence of God the essence of Christian Mindfulness

Church History and Self-Care Evelyn Underhill(19 th/20 thc. ) We are essentially spiritual as well as physical as natural creatures; and that therefore life in its fullness, the which shall develop and use all our capacities and fulfil all our possibilities, must involve correspondence changing, but environment. . . The also not only with our visible and ever- our invisible and unchanging, meaning of our life is bound up with the meaning of the universe. Evelyn Underhill. The Spiritual Life

Church History and Self-Care Evelyn Underhill(19 th/20 thc. ) Most of our conflicts and difficulties come from trying to deal with the spiritual and practical aspects of our life separately instead of realising them as part of one whole. If our practical life is centred on our own interests, worries, [and busy-ness]. . . we need not expect that our spiritual life will be a contrast to this. Evelyn Underhill. The Spiritual Life

Church History and Self-Care Evelyn Underhill(19 th/20 thc. ) Fuss and feverishness, pessimism anxiety, intensity, intolerance, instability, and wobble, and every kind of hurry and worry – these. . . are signs of the self-made and self-acting soul; the spiritual parvenu. The saints are never like this. Evelyn Underhill. The Spiritual Life

Church History and Self-Care Thomas Merton(20 thc. ) Contemplation is the highest expression of man’s intellectual and spiritual life. . . Contemplation is, above all, awareness of the reality of [the Source]. Thomas Merton. New Seeds of Contemplation

Church History and Self-Care Thomas Merton(20 thc. ) Far from being essentially opposed to each other, interior contemplation and external activity are two aspects of the same love of God. But the activity of a contemplative must be born of his contemplation and must resemble it. Everything he does outside of his contemplation ought to reflect the luminous tranquillity of his interior life. Thomas Merton. New Seeds of Contemplation

Church History and Self-Care Thomas Merton(20 thc. ) Learn how to meditate on paper. Drawing and writing are forms of meditation. Learn how to contemplate works of art. Learn how to pray in the streets or in the country. Know how to meditate not only when you have a book in your hand but when you are waiting for a bus or riding in a train. Above all, enter into the Church’s liturgy and make the liturgical cycle a part of your life – let its rhythms work its way into your body and soul. Thomas Merton. New Seeds of Contemplation

Church History and Self-Care Thomas Merton(20 thc. ) We do not live merely in order to “do something”. . . Activity is just one of the normal expressions of life. . . This. . . demands a wise alternation of activity and rest. We do not live more fully merely by doing more. . . on the contrary, some of us need to discover that we will not begin to live more fully until we have the courage to do and see and taste and experience much less. Thomas Merton. No man island

Church History and Self-Care Anthony De Mello(20 thc. ) The internal and external realities of our selves as we imitate Christ must match. This can be done through many means. Anthony De Mello encouraged regular spiritual exercises, just as Ignatius of Loyola did. See sections of his books Awareness. ch: not pushing it & Sadhana – a way to God: Christian exercises in Eastern form. ch: awareness and contemplation

Church History and Self-Care William Mc. Namara(20 thc. ) The mystic is not a special kind of person; every person is a special kind of mystic. . . the contemplative life of passionate presence flows naturally into the active life of presence to and in the world. . . God has revealed that he is content to dwell in us and that he finds delight in us when we embody him. . . There is Divine contentment in the human venture. . . we must be God-centred human beings, earthy enfleshments of the Numinous. William Mc. Namara. Earthy Mysticism – contemplation and the life of passionate presence

Church History and Self-Care Thomas Keating(20. . . our consciousness thc. ) can be likened to a river, with our thoughts passing like boats along its surface. . . the river also has depths. . . there is a spiritual level of awareness where our intellect and will are functioning in their own proper way in a spiritual manner. Deeper still, or more ‘centred’ is the Divine Indwelling where the divine energy is present at the source of our being and inspiration at every moment. Fr. Thomas Keating. Intimacy with God – an introduction to centering prayer

Church History and Self-Care Richard Rohr(20 thc. ) Our Vision The Center for Action and Contemplation supports a new reformation—from the inside— In the spirit of a Cosmic Christ Confirming people’s deeper spiritual intuitions Encouraging actions of justice rooted in prayer With a new appreciation for, and cooperation with, other denominations, religions, and cultures Our Mission “We are a center for experiential education, rooted in the Gospels, encouraging the transformation of human consciousness through contemplation, and equipping people to be instruments of peaceful change in the world. ” Centre for action and Contemplation website

Church History and Self-Care Richard Rohr(20 thc. ) The Eight Core Principles of the Center for Action and Contemplation 1. The teaching of Jesus is our central reference point. (criterion) 2. We need a contemplative mind in order to do compassionate action. (process) 3. The best criticism of the bad is the practice of the better. Oppositional energy only creates more of the same. (emphasis) 4. Practical truth is more likely found at the bottom and the edges than at the top or the center of most groups, institutions, and cultures. (perspective) Centre for action and Contemplation website

Church History and Self-Care Richard Rohr(20 thc. ) The Eight Core Principles of the Center for Action and Contemplation 5. We will support true authority, the ability to “author” life in others, regardless of the group. (non-tribal) 6. Life is about discovering the right questions more than having the right answers. (primacy of discernment) 7. True religion leads us to an experience of our True Self and undermines my false self. (ultimate direction) 8. We do not think ourselves into a new way of living, but we live ourselves into a new way of thinking. (praxis over theory) Centre for action and Contemplation website

Church History and Self-Care Carl Mc. Colman(20 thc. ). . . mystical Christianity is less about attaining unity with God and more about creating an inner emptiness where you can offer God hospitality. This has implications in how you read the bible, how you pray, and ultimately how you relate to silence, both externally and internally. . . to the extent that God does pour divinity into you, the point is not to hoard [it]. . . but rather to immediately give it away, by lavishly loving, caring for, and serving other people. Carl Mc. Colman. The Big Book of Christian Mysticism – the essential guide to contemplative spirituality

Church History and Self-Care What we see reflected throughout the contemplative tradition of the Christian faith is the essentiality of balancing the activity of our ministry with the stillness of meditation and contemplation. In fact, we find threaded throughout the teachings of the Christian mystics that our actions should, in fact, come out of our contemplation. We should not be ‘doing’ before we have spent time just ‘being’.