Section II Store Your Bricks Love Grows in

Section II Store Your Bricks Love, Grows in Marriage Social scientists have observed that marriages typically move through a series of at least four stages. Each stage presents unique learning opportunities and blessings, along with challenges and obstacles. Stage One——Romance, Passion and Promise

Section II Store Your Bricks In the beginning of a relationship partners often communicate effortlessly and at length. They seem to intuit each other's needs and wishes and go out of their way to please and surprise each other. Couples begin to develop a strong sense of “we”. Individual differences are minimized, if noticed at all; partners are very accepting. Joy, excitement, happiness and hope abound. Partners present and elicit their best selves. Life seems promising. It is a time of sharing dreams and romance. This is a time to be remembered and cherished.

Section II Store Your Bricks Stage Two——Settling down and Realization The high energy and intensity of Stage One inevitably give way to the ordinary and routine. Ideally, in Stage Two couples learn to deepen their communication skills. They work to understand express their wants , needs, and feelings.

Section II Store Your Bricks They learn to be honest and vulnerable and to listen actively to each other. They become aware of differences noticed previously and develop strategies for dealing with them. Couples learn about give and take, negotiation and accommodation.

Section II Store Your Bricks Stage Three——Rebellion and Power Struggles Spouses cannot always live up to each other's expectations. They will disappoint and unintentionally hurt each other. They now become intensely aware of their differences and may use control strategies to bring back the desired balance. Power struggles are common. Blame, judgment, criticism and defensiveness are likely outcomes.

Section II Store Your Bricks Fear and anxiety enter the relationship. Couples' thinking can narrow into right/wrong, good/bad polarities. Ideally, couples learn about forgiveness and accommodation constructively in with this stage. anger and They hurt. community becomes especially important. learn A to deal supportive

Section II Store Your Bricks Stage Four——Discovery, Reconciliation, and Beginning Again Couples can push through the previous stage through deepened communication, honesty and trust. Ideally, they discover and create a new sense of connection. They learn more about each other's strengths and vulnerabilities. They learn to identify and talk about their fears instead of acting them out. They refuse to judge or blame their partner; they translate their complaints into requests for change.

Section II Store Your Bricks Partners see each other in a new light, as gifted and flawed , just as they themselves are gifted and flawed. Empathy and compassion increase. They learn to appreciate and respect each other in new ways; they learn not to take each other for granted. They find a new balance of separateness and togetherness, independence and intimacy. A new hope and energy return to the relationship.

Section II Store Your Bricks Additional Challenges and Stages Many couples will encounter additional life cycle stages. Just like marriage, creating a family will face many challenges. It is another opportunity to learn about cooperation and becoming a team, about dealing with differences and conflicts , and about taking time to pause and choose.

Section II Store Your Bricks Parenting is a spiritual journey that involves not only the growth of the children but the growth of the parents. Like marriage, it will have many opportunities to surrender and die to self, to let go and to grieve. Other life cycle challenges include illness, unemployment and other financial crises, retirement, and the death of one's partner. Many couples must take care of the older generation while letting go of the younger one.

Section II Store Your Bricks Growth throughout the marital journey requires openness and flexibility. Faith requires trust and surrender. Even if we cannot see the entire road and where it will end, we need to have clarity to take the next few steps.

Section II Store Your Bricks Practice What You Learnt Task 1 Comprehension Check Choose the best answer according to the text.

Section II Store Your Bricks According to the passage, rebellion occurs in which marriages typically move through? A. stage one B. stage two C. stage three D. stage four Answer C

Section II Store Your Bricks Individual differences are minimized in ______ , if noticed at all. A. stage one B. stage two C. stage three D. stage four Answer A

Section II Store Your Bricks Hemant Joshi once said: After marriage, husband wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together. Which of the following is true according to this saying? A. It's full of positive energy. B. It holds identical views with the author. C. It's negative and one-sided. D. It's a golden saying. Answer C

Section II Store Your Bricks Which of the following statement is NOT the author's view? A. Each stage of marriage is a unique learning opportunities and filled with blessings. B. Openness and flexibility are required throughout the marital journey. C. Like marriage, to become parent also needs to surrender and die to self, to let go and to grieve. D. Husband wife need to be considerate of each other unconditionally. D Answer

Section II Store Your Bricks According to the passage, which of the following is NOT the reason why marriage needs learning? A. Marriage is always accompanied by challenges and obstacles. B. Husband wife need to deal with differences and conflicts. C. Love and marriage are different. D. In the world today, the divorce rates of all the countries are very high. Answer D

Section II Store Your Bricks Task 2 Vocabulary and Sentences （1）Match the words on the left with their meanings on the right.

Section II Store Your Bricks ① vulnerable A. a feeling of being intimate and belonging together ② empathy B. free from obscurity and easy to understand; the comprehensibility of clear expression ③ flexibility C. a relation between two opposite attributes or tendencies ④ polarity D. excessive sensitivity to criticism ⑤inevitably E. the quality of being adaptable or variable ⑥ flawed F. understanding and entering into another people's feelings ⑦clarity G. know or grasp by intuition or feeling ⑧intimacy H. to do something easily ⑨effortlessly I. in such a manner as could not be otherwise ⑩defensiveness J. a person's partner in marriage spouse intuit K. capable of being wounded or hurt L. have a mark, fault, or mistake in something

Section II Store Your Bricks （2）Complete the sentences with the words from above. Change the form if necessary. click effortlessly John seems to breeze _____ through his many commitments at work. click defensiveness I see that wall of ______ go up, she says.

Section II Store Your Bricks There must be a rethink of government policy towards vulnerable click this______ group. Having begun my life in a children's home I have great empathy click with the little ones. ____

Section II Store Your Bricks click that it was universal. intuit He was probably right to____ click intimacy It takes time to build up_____. Her father is an ultra-conservative who is still opposed to click spouse freedom to choose her_____. flawed click These tests were so seriously _____ as to render the results meaningless.

Section II Store Your Bricks click of distance learning would be particularly flexibility The ____ suited to busy managers. polarity click between good He viewed it as a balanced_____ and evil.

Section II Store Your Bricks click Inevitably ______those who suffer the most are the mothers and children. click clarity He always put his point of view with _____ and with courage.

Section II Store Your Bricks (3) Rewrite the following sentences after the model. This note was left by Mr. Smith，and he was here a few minutes ago. was here clicka few minutes This note was left by Mr. Smith who ____________ ago _______.

Section II Store Your Bricks The girl joined the league yesterday, and her voice is sweet. clickjoined the league whose voice is sweet The girl was ___________________ yesterday ______. We had an argument, and it was about the price of the computer. click the price of the which was about We had an argument _______________ computer _________.

Section II Store Your Bricks He is lack of experience, but he got the job. the lack of experience, he got the job click Despite__________________.

Section II Store Your Bricks He took unconventional methods, but he has inspired pupils more than anyone else. his unconventional methods, he has inspired click Despite _____________________ pupils more than anyone else _____________.

Section II Store Your Bricks Her friends raised obvious objections, but she persevered in her idea. obvious objectionsclick raised by friends , she Despite _____________________ persevered in her idea __________.

Section II Store Your Bricks Replenishing stocks requires three hundred thousand tons of cereals. are needed to Three hundred thousand tons of cereals _______ replenish stocks click __________.

Section II Store Your Bricks Cooling requires large quantities of water. are neededclick for cooling Large quantities of water___________. Securing the camp against attack requires extra men. are needed to secureclick the camp against attack Extra men ____________________.

Section II Store Your Bricks Think optimistically about where you are going, don't be disappointed at where you are. being disappointedclick at where you are , think Instead of ___________________ optimistically about where you are going __________________.

Section II Store Your Bricks Donate money for the poor men, don't spend it in gambling. spending money in gambling , donating it for click Instead of ____________________ the poor men _______. Postpone the shipment, don't cancel the contract. has formedclick a government Instead of_________________.

Section II Store Your Bricks Task 3 Translation (1) Translate the following passage into Chinese. Love shines the most beautiful light of humanity（人）, we born in it, we live by it. Too often we take it as granted, but we should know love is a priceless gift we should cherish（珍视）. But how to cherish the love? I have heard a saying: the quickest way to receive love is to give it; the fastest way to lose love is to hold it too tightly;

Section II Store Your Bricks the best way to keep love is to give it wings. When you are young, you may want several love experiences. But as time goes on, you will realize that if you really love someone, the whole life will not be enough. You need time to know, to forgive and to love. All this needs a very big mind.

Section II Store Your Bricks (2) Translate the following passage into English. It is important for us to learn to love as the first class in our life. Only when you know how to love then you will be a real man in this world. Love brings us warmth in the fearful coldness. Love brings us confidence toward life when we are tired out and want to give up. Love deserves all the admiring words, and love is even beyond the life and death. That is what love is all about in my eyes.

Section II Store Your Bricks Task 4 Reading Aloud Read the whole text aloud until you have learnt them by heart. Then try to complete the passage from memory. click typically marriages Social scientists have observed that ____ click four move through a series of at least ______stages. Each click and opportunities stage presents unique learning _______ click obstacles blessings, along with challenges and _____. In the beginning of a relationship partners often communicate effortlessly click _____ and at length.

Section II Store Your Bricks intuit click each other's needs and wishes and They seem to ____ go out of their way to please and surprise each other. In fighting click stage two, they learn to be honest and_____ and to listen actively to each other. In stage three, they become intensely aware of their differences and may use click to bring back the desired balance. They strategies control_____ fears click identify learn to_______ and talk about their ______ instead of acting them out.