Scripting CONFLICT DEFINED Conflict is an expressed struggle

CONFLICT DEFINED Conflict is an expressed struggle between at least two interdependent parties who

OBJECTIVES By the end of training/class, trainees/students will Be able to describe conflict scripts

OVERVIEW Win as much as you can (20 mins) Discussion on Reading of Scripts/Games

VALUE Transaction = communication model Consider role of mediator as therapist (don’t do this)

Rescuer • Selflessness • Doing for others • Generosity 3 ROLES Persecutor • Outcome

KEY POINTS FROM READING Script = blue print for a life course (macro) Transaction

KEY POINTS FROM READING Stimulus hunger Stroke = stimulation given to another (e. g.

DISCOUNTS Very common and easy to do (pp. 120 -121) Example from work or

SCHOOL S 1: “I have a suggestion, why don’t we do X. ” S

WORK Employee: “I’d like a raise, if possible. ” Boss: “It’s not possible” or

GROUPS (1 -3) Summarize each banal script, give a quick example Choose one script

PARTNER ACTIVITY – PART III TRIANGLES (10 MINS) Help each other sketch at least

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Scripting

CONFLICT DEFINED Conflict is an expressed struggle between at least two interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals, scarce resources, and interference from others in achieving their goals. - Hocker & Wilmot, 2014, p. 13

OBJECTIVES By the end of training/class, trainees/students will Be able to describe conflict scripts Have a useful tool to complete conflict analysis

OVERVIEW Win as much as you can (20 mins) Discussion on Reading of Scripts/Games (15 mins) Lecture scripts/games (25 mins) Activity: Discuss actual conflicts and map triangles/games (25 mins) Debrief (5 mins)

VALUE Transaction = communication model Consider role of mediator as therapist (don’t do this) Antithesis (how do we get people to do this? ) = Constructive complaint (Hocker & Wilmot, p. 23) Similar to triangles (different take on them, explains roles in conflict) Note: reading presented as destructive case, but we all play these games to some degree.

Rescuer • Selflessness • Doing for others • Generosity 3 ROLES Persecutor • Outcome of rescuer-victim script • Power play (+) Victim (vs. victim) • Power play (-) • Martyr

KEY POINTS FROM READING Script = blue print for a life course (macro) Transaction (communication; see model) Discounts (common communication behavior) Game (micro) Orderly series of transactions Contains an ulterior motive Results in a payoff for both players (good or bad)

KEY POINTS FROM READING Stimulus hunger Stroke = stimulation given to another (e. g. , hug or recognition) Structure hunger = situation where stroking is common (e. g. , bars, social gatherings, counseling) Position hunger = situations that reinforce existential (being) script (e. g. , “I am Victim, I am rescuer, I am persecutor) Be ware of “stamp collecting” or “cashing in” behaviors

DISCOUNTS Very common and easy to do (pp. 120 -121) Example from work or school School: Group suggestions Work: Asking for a raise

SCHOOL S 1: “I have a suggestion, why don’t we do X. ” S 2: (No recognition) or “That’s not what instructor wants. ”

WORK Employee: “I’d like a raise, if possible. ” Boss: “It’s not possible” or “We can’t afford giving raises right now. ”

GROUPS (1 -3) Summarize each banal script, give a quick example Choose one script Provide a common interaction scenario (micro) – unproductive/discount Suggest alternative using counter argument strategy

PARTNER ACTIVITY – PART III TRIANGLES (10 MINS) Help each other sketch at least one triangle for your conflict Dyads Conflicting dyads // Allies/Coalitions ( ) Isolates ---- 0 Power over (+), Power under (-)