Samra Habibs memoir is an exploration of the
Samra Habib's memoir is an exploration of the ways we disguise and minimize ourselves for the sake of survival. As a child, Habib hid her faith from Islamic extremists in Pakistan and later, as a refugee in Canada, endured racist bullying and the threat of an arranged marriage. In travelling the world and exploring art and sexuality, Habib searches for the truth of her identity. Note to teachers: This document contains spoilers! If you intend to read only the book excerpt provided on curio. ca with your students, this document gives a fuller picture of the book content. If you intend to read the whole book with your students, you may wish to remove spoilers before sharing the document with students. Visit www. curio. ca/canadareads to read an excerpt from We Have Always Been Here and watch Samra Habib discuss her book.
Book Description LITERACY STRATEGY Samra Habib’s personal memoir, We Have Always Been Here, is a coming-of-age and coming-out story about navigating experiences of Otherness as an Ahmadi Muslim in Pakistan and a queer Muslim in Canada, looking for a safe space to be herself. If you are using this backgrounder directly with students, have them review the document for new vocabulary. They can highlight new words and research their meaning. The first quarter of the book describes some of Samra’s family history and her childhood in Pakistan. As members of a persecuted sect of Islam, the Habib’s become concerned about increasing tensions and violence, and decide to flee to Canada. helping them adapt to their new reality, speaking to immigration officials, credit card reps and others. When Samra starts grade six — her first time at a Canadian school — she finds it an unkind place where she is bullied and the target of continuous racial slurs. Settling in Canada is a culture shock on a number of fronts for the Habib’s. Having the best command of English in her family, Samra takes on a bigger role in At 13, Samra learns that she is engaged to be married to her cousin Nasir, an arrangement brokered by her mother. Samra goes into high school carrying the www. curio. ca/canadareads /2
uncomfortable secret that she is betrothed to her first cousin. Unlike elementary school, however, high school is a more positive experience. At 16, Samra’s nikah (Islamic marriage) to Nasir takes place the night before her biology midterm. After marriage, Samra’s parents become less strict with her, while Nasir becomes far more controlling. As she becomes more interested in education, fashion, writing and western popular culture, Nasir is intimidated and becomes very controlling. Going against her family and cultural values, Samra decides that she must end the marriage. She becomes closer to her friend Peter, a gentle, mixed-race boy, whose parents immigrated from South Africa to escape apartheid, and they go to prom together. Samra becomes depressed after prom, unsure of how to break off her marriage. When Nasir brings her home a veal sandwich from Seven-Eleven where he works, she tries to take her own life by dousing the sandwich in bleach and eating a few bites. Feeling dizzy, she asks to be taken to the doctor. The symptoms subside after an hour in the waiting room and she tells her mother and Nasir she’s well enough to go home. Back home, Samra gathers her family in her parents’ bedroom. She says she does not love Nasir and does not want to be his wife. Their marriage is annulled, but Samra becomes an outcast in the Muslim community, www. curio. ca/canadareads /3
becoming increasingly isolated and fighting with her parents. She also learns that she’s been accepted into every university program she applied for and decides to run away from home. She moves in with Peter. After months of ignoring her mother’s frantic calls, she finally phones her and tells her she is fine. She lies and says she eloped with Peter. Soon after, Samra jokingly proposes to Peter and is surprised when he says yes. They go to city hall, get drunk afterward and go home. Over the next few years, she immerses herself in liberal city life and, with the help of her friend Andrew, Samra grows into herself more, experimenting with haircuts, getting a tattoo and connecting with feminist women of colour online. After graduation, Samra is hired by a car company publication. She works under Abi, an outspoken lesbian woman who nurtures her creative team. Abi represents the opposite of what Samra has been taught a woman should be and is inspired to start trying on the label of queer. She begins meeting more queer men and women in the art world. Meanwhile, Samra and Peter have drifted apart. They go to couples’ counselling, but she is unable to be honest with him. She ends their marriage and they are both heartbroken. Feeling the void of not having mosque, which she hadn’t attended since her late teens, Samra goes to a mosque run by a queer man and his husband. It is an www. curio. ca/canadareads /4
experience unlike any one she’s ever had and it inspires her to start her own project. She becomes interested in photography and decides she wants to create a platform where queer Muslims can freely tell their stories. As the book winds down, Samra reflects on what it means to be publicly queer and Muslim. Her family worries for her safety. She does too, but it does not deter her from continuing her work, sharing stories, writing about Islamophobia, homophobia, alienation and the complexities of community. Despite what she’d been taught much of her life, Samra finds that the intersection of being Muslim and queer does exist — it’s been within her all along. Primary Characters NOTE: Some names have been changed to protect people’s identities. Samra – The eldest of four children, Samra was born in Pakistan and moved to Canada the summer before sixth grade. She is introverted, bookish, and loves her family, though she feels smothered by their expectations. Yasmin – Samra’s mother was raised to be a pious, quiet wife and wishes the same of her daughter. Yasmin brought her young children to Canada and started her own business, employing other immigrants. She is initially concerned about Samra’s www. curio. ca/canadareads /5
free spirit, but eventually is able to accept her and be proud that she is a punk. Samra’s father – Though strict, business savvy, and hot tempered, Samra’s father also has moments of surprising tenderness. He maintains a tenuous relationship Samra, with whom he shares a love of architecture and design. his otherness. He loves Samra, to whom he is briefly married, and takes care of her financially when she runs away from home. When their marriage ends, Peter is devastated. Andrew & Abi – Samra’s queer friends from university, who help Samra embrace her true self and show her a path she didn’t know existed. Nasir – Samra’s older cousin speaks little English. He marries Samra when she’s 16 and, threatened by her education, becomes controlling. When she asks to end their marriage, he protests and threatens her, but eventually leaves quietly. Peter – A kind boy who lives with his father, Peter grew up mixed-race in a mostly white place, very aware of www. curio. ca/canadareads /6
Key Themes INTERSECTIONALITY, HOMOPHOBIA and ISLAMOPHOBIA – Samra discovers through her photo project that many queer people have rejected their Muslim origins because they do not feel welcome within the community. Samra fights to inhabit both these identities by raising the visibility of queer Muslims throughout the world. This is not without risk, as being queer and Muslim draws attention from dangerous people. OTHERNESS/HIDING – This is a motif throughout Samra’s life. She grew up as a member of a persecuted religious sect in Pakistan and was ordered to hide her religion. Later, she hides the fact that she is married to her cousin in high school. When her marriage ends, she is forced to hide from the Muslim community who consider her a bad influence. Samra spent a great deal of her life figuring out her sexuality, and then hid it from her parents because she did not know how to act. Samra finds she is comfortable hiding for a short while, but despair will always follow until she is able to be herself freely. She comes to embrace her role as an outsider, rather than a miserable conformist pretending to fit in, and uses it to bring awareness to those living in the margins. SEX – Samra learns from her mother and other adults in her life that it is not proper to talk about sex or be alone with a member of the opposite gender. From other girls at high school in Canada, Samra learns that sex can be enjoyable and her curiosity is piqued. www. curio. ca/canadareads /7
However, due to cultural suppression, it is a long time before Samra is able to understand who she is and come out to the world — and then to her parents. TRAUMA – Samra is sexually assaulted by a father’s friend at a young age. At 13, she finds out she’s engaged to marry her older cousin, Nasir. After she ends their marriage, she is shunned by her community. IMMIGRATION – Moving to a new country with a different language and culture proves challenging financially and psychologically for Samra’s family. They were relatively prosperous in Pakistan and are now living in a tiny apartment in Canada, surviving on welfare and barely able to make rent. As the most advanced English speaker, Samra takes on a bigger role in her family and often worries about their finances. Her father refuses to take jobs available to him as a non. English speaker (e. g. taxi driver) and instead lounges on the couch for the day, which strains his marriage. Samra’s mother is able to start a beauty salon, which becomes very successful. Samra endures bullying by kids at school and is taunted with racial slurs. As she grows older, the scars of her early life remain and she feels isolated when those around her are unable to relate to experiences. ART – Art is a savior for Samra. She started writing stories as a child and found refuge in books. She also loves to perform and wins a drama award in elementary school. As a teenager, Samra becomes captivated by fashion, which continues throughout her life. Now, she uses photography as a means to bring more light and joy into the world. www. curio. ca/canadareads /8
About the Author Samra Habib is a writer, photographer, and activist. As a journalist, she's covered topics ranging from fashion trends and Muslim dating apps, to the rise of Islamophobia in the U. S. Her writing has appeared in The New York Times, The Guardian, and The Advocate. Her photo project, "Just Me and Allah, " — featured in Nylon, Vanity Fair Italia, Vice, and The Washington Post — can be seen here: https: //queermuslimproject. tumblr. com/ Habib works with LGBTQ organizations internationally, raising awareness of issues that impact queer Muslims around the world. We Have Always Been Here, longlisted for the 2019 RBC Taylor Prize, is her first book. Notable Quotes from Reviews “We Have Always Been Here challenges so many received wisdoms on gender, faith and sexuality that its very existence in the world is cause for celebration. ” – The Globe and Mail “Habib writes through a lens of compassion, hope, and ever-widening circles of understanding. ” – Quill and Quire www. curio. ca/canadareads /9
“I fell in love with this book. In prose as economical, crisp, clear, and truthful as poetry, Samra Habib offers a map of how we might learn to see and treasure one another and ourselves. In this way, it calls to mind the works of James Baldwin, Langston Hughes, and Jane Rule. I predict that this book will never go out of print — it will become required and desired reading for people of all ages, persuasions, and backgrounds. How I wish I had it to keep close to my heart when I was younger. ” – Shani Mootoo, author of Cereus Blooms at Night “Gutting and redemptive, We Have Always Been Here is the story of one woman’s path to self-determination against every odd. Habib’s voice is sensual and mesmerizing, her talent fierce and necessary. A transformative reading experience. . . Habib’s every word lifts off the page, vital and bright as a match being struck. ” – Claudia Dey, author of Heartbreaker “Samra Habib’s memoir unfolds like a pre-digital photograph developing before our eyes. The identities she carries lovingly and with pride insist we revere a complication for so long denied. To say I count, I exist, is revolutionary when you are denied complication. Habib has written the book she wished she had when she was young. It is a book we should all have had long ago. ” – Mona Eltahawy, author of Headscarves and Hymens: Why the Middle East Needs a Sexual Revolution Watch Samra Habib discuss her book: www. curio. ca/canadareads /10
CBC Links • Book Page: www. cbc. ca/1. 4990355 • Author Page: www. cbc. ca/1. 5191102 • HIWI: Why Samra Habib wrote a memoir about growing up as a queer Muslim woman (text): www. cbc. ca/1. 5187730 • Why Samra Habib shares her story about being a queer Muslim woman and coming to Canada as a refugee (text, audio + video): www. cbc. ca/1. 5299454 • Q: Photographer Samra Habib puts the spotlight on LGBT Muslims (audio): www. cbc. ca/1. 3431743 Other Links • Toronto Star: www. thestar. com/entertainment/ books/2019/06/21/samra-habib-founder-of-gay -muslim-project-turns-the-camera-on-herself-innew-memoir. html • Speech published in Walrus: www. thewalrus. ca/boundaries-samra-habib/ • Globe and Mail: www. theglobeandmail. com/arts/books/articlepenning-a-memoir-helped-this-author-find-joyfrom-her-pain/ • Brown Girl Magazine: www. browngirlmagazine. com/2019/09/interview-queer-muslim-writersamra-habib/ www. curio. ca/canadareads /11
Critical Thinking Questions Students will need to read the excerpt from We Have Always Been Here found at www. curio. ca/canadareads and may need to do some research to help them craft a response. 1. One of the central themes of We Have Always Been Here is intersectionality – the way our social categorizations (race, class, gender, etc. ) overlap to deepen our level of discrimination or disadvantage. Samra Habib, for example, is a queer Muslim female. What are the various ways you might categorize your own social identity? How might these designations affect your level of privilege? 2. Read the excerpt at www. curio. ca/canadareads. Which factors contribute to Samra’s alienation from her Muslim community at her mosque? How does intersectionality help to explain her isolation at her mosque? 3. In the excerpt, Samra describes her relationship with Islam as deeper than “a private relationship with Allah. ” What else does Islam do for Samra? Can you think of something in your life that serves you in ways that aren’t always obvious or seen? 2. Immigrant families often sacrifice a great deal to start a new life in another country. Samra’s father, for example, is a savvy businessperson forced to consider driving a taxi for a living. What www. curio. ca/canadareads /12 are some
other sacrifices new immigrants make? What obligations do Canadians and Canadian society have to new immigrants? 5. 6. For Samra, art has always been a tool – of joy, of escape, of helping to heal the world. What does art mean to you? What is the role of art for individuals and in society? What needs to happen in Canadian society for people like Samra to feel comfortable coming out? Consider the progress Canada has made in terms of attitudes and values around sexuality and gender over the past several decades – why do some Canadians still hesitate to embrace their sexual orientation? 7. Consider the previous questions and your responses. Now, re-examine the book’s title. Why is We Have Always Been Here an appropriate title for Habib’s memoir? What are the multiple ways to understand this title? Inquiry Activities 1. Teachers might facilitate a privilege walk in their classroom to help students recognize how power and privilege work together to create disparities in society. Instructions for this activity can be found here: www. uh. edu/cdi/diversity_education/resources/ activities/pdf/privilege-walk. pdf www. curio. ca/canadareads /13
2. Students might select and research a public figure, like Samra, whose intersectionality created adversity on their path to success and becoming themselves. 3. Students might explore the Canadian Charter of Rights and Freedoms and identify the specific sections that protect Canadians like Samra. Acknowledgments – Guide writer/editor: Chris Coates © 2020 Canadian Broadcasting Corporation www. curio. ca/canadareads /14
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