Sample Practice TopicFast Food Writing Situation Fast food

Sample Practice Topic—Fast Food Writing Situation Fast food is everywhere. Many of us don’t stop to think what we are eating when we grab a convenient bite to eat on the way to school or an out-oftown ball game. Lately, however, the media have reported the harmful effects of this type of food. Your principal is considering whether or not to add fast food selections to the cafeteria menu. The principal has asked for recommendations from various groups of people, including students. Think about what would be best for the students at your school. Directions for Writing Write a letter to your principal in which you present your position on the issue of adding fast food to the school menu. Provide reasons and evidence that would convince the principal to accept or reject adding fast food to the menu. (reprinted from Gordon and Murphy, From Formula to Form) 1

A Sample Prompt, Marked to Show Issue, Audience, and Task Writing Topic Number 1 Writing Situation Fast food is everywhere. Many of us don’t stop to think before we grab a convenient bite to eat on the way to school or an out-of-town ball game. Lately, however, the media have covered more and more stories about the harmful effects of this food. audience Your principal is considering whether or not to add fast food selections to the cafeteria menu. The principal has asked for recommendations from various groups of people, including students. Think about what would be best for your school. Directions for Writing (format) background information to introduce the issue in a broad context and the different positions. the issue as it applies to the writer (Write a letter to your principal) in which you support your position on the issue of fast food in your school. [Provide reasons and evidence] that would convince the principal to accept or reject fast-food offerings for the students in your high school. writing task [Suggestions for how to persuade the audience. These suggestions apply to all the Writing Topics. ] audience restated A note about the letter format: The format merely provides a realistic type of response to issue. The test response is a formal essay, even if the prompt specifies a letter or speech. 2

Approaches to Persuasion—from the Writer’s Perspective • “What I want and why” • “What I want, why you (my audience) probably won’t want to give it to me, and what we can do about your objections that will satisfy both of us” • “Here’s what’s wrong—or at least unattractive— about the other options or points of view and that’s why you will agree with my choice because it looks better by comparison” 3

Approaches to Persuasion from the Writer’s Perspective • “Let me tell you a story that will make my point, make you cry, or make you so mad you want to fix the problem” • “You’ve got a problem and not only do I know what’s wrong with the solutions you’re thinking about, I have a solution that will work for both of us” • “We’re both on the same team, the winning team” 4

Persuasive Appeals • • Appealing to Logic and Reason Appealing to Emotions Pointing out the practical benefits for the audience of giving the writer what he or she wants Providing choices or alternatives Identifying the flaws in the alternatives Showing how a potential problem or obstacle can be handled more easily than the audience thinks Providing plausible data Citing (probably made-up) sources of information Making the new information familiar • • • Forming an alliance with the audience Playing to audience’s ego Sharing a bonding story Making a confession Loaded, compelling description Letting the story speak for the writer Going for guilt Making the reader laugh Creating an analogy or parallel experience 5

Prewriting Questions for the Writer to Think About 1. What is the issue? 2. What do I think and feel about the issue? 3. What are the different sides of the issue? 4. Which side of the issue (for or against, agree or disagree, solution to the problem, or plan to propose) do I have the most to write about? 5. Who is the audience? 6. What concerns and objections are the audience likely to have about the issue? 7. What can I say in response to these concerns to minimize the audience’s objections? 8. What is my focusing statement (i. e. , my position on the issue)? 6

Writing Sample on the Fast Food Topic What NOT To Do: The Ineffective Five Paragraph Formula Dear Principal O’Connor: Fast food should be served in our school for three reasons. The first reason is because fast food tastes good. The second reason is because fast food is cheap. The third reason is because teenagers like fast food. The first reason fast food should be served in our school is because it tastes good. French fries are the best. I am sure you agree they are tasty. I don’t know if you are thinking about pizza, but my friends and I love pizza with pepperoni and lots of extra cheese. Burgers are good too, especially the ones with cheese and bacon. The second reason you should give us fast food is because fast food is cheap. Everywhere you go you can find 99 cent specials. I could get fries and a burger for less than two dollars. Pizza is cheap too because my friends and I could share a whole pizza. Why would we want to pay for salad when we can get our favorite foods? The third reason is because teenagers like fast food. We don’t like healthy stuff. The food in our cafeteria is not very good. That’s why we throw it away or spend our money in the vending machine. We are teenagers after all. We like French fries and pizza. In conclusion of my writing, you should give us fast food. The first reason is because it tastes good. The second reason it because it is cheap. The third reason is because teenagers like fast food. 7

A Quiz on the Fast Food Essay to Illustrate How Much Information is Missing 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. What is the current menu? What is wrong with the food that is currently served in the school cafeteria? How much money are students currently spending on school lunches? How much money would fast food save? What reasons does the writer provide for not adding fast food options? Why are these reasons relatively unimportant? Who will object to adding fast food? What does the writer recommend the principal do to respond to the objections? How is the cafeteria menu connected to the purpose of school and what the principal wants to accomplish? Why should the principal give teens what they want? In other words, what’s in it for the principal? 8

Repetition of Simple Language in the Formula-Driven Essay What’s Repeated More Effective Word Choice • • • Instead of fast food • “Answer to a busy mother’s prayers, ” • “food you don’t have to wait for, ” • specific foods or brand names Fast Food Teens Like First, second, third reason good cheap Word Choice and Description Instead of cheap • “a bargain” • “ 99 cent special” • “a filling meal with enough money left to eat tomorrow” 9

Moving from Formula-Driven Writing to Writing for Meaning Topic Development Ineffective Formulaic “Three Reasons” The Loose List Effective Approach With Major Supporting Ideas Connected to Each Other and to the Position on the Issue What the Major Supporting Ideas Are • Fast food tastes good • Fast food is cheap • Teenagers like fast food • School is the perfect setting for all kinds of learning • A varied menu, including fast foods, would make the cafeteria into a science lab • Once we learn through experimentation what foods make us feel good and which ones make us feel bad, we’ll make smart choices. Why the Approach Does or Does Not Work • The three reasons are simplistic • Small ideas, such as “cheap, ” lead to lists of details such as the names of foods and prices • The three reasons show a lack of understanding of the major supporting points that would work for the principal as the audience • The major supporting ideas are connected through an internal logic, provided by a unifying concepteducation- and an organizational plan showing cause-effect and problem-solution connections between the ideas • The ideas demonstrate an understanding of the audience, appealing to the principal’s need to promote education 10

Avoiding Formulaic Persuasive Writing • Examine the prewriting list of “what I know and feel about the issue” for connections between the ideas such as cause-effect, comparison-contrast, or order of importance. • Change places with the audience assigned in the writing topic. look at the reasons and evidence to support your (the writer’s) position from the audience’s point of view. What’s “wrong” with what you want? What can you say to both acknowledge the audience’s objections and get them to change? • Instead of the five-paragraph persuasive essay, provide support for the position on the topic through an extended narrative. Tell a compelling story that is clearly linked to both the issue and your position on it. • Instead of the five-paragraph persuasive essay, produce a counter argument that shows awareness of how the audience thinks about the issue. Present a well-thought out alternative. • Instead of a five-paragraph persuasive essay, reframe the issue as a problem and offer convincing solution(s). 11

Avoiding Formulaic Persuasive Writing While Maintaining a Formal Structure §Restate rather than repeat thesis and major supporting points in the body and conclusion. §Save the supporting points for the body paragraphs. Write an interesting introduction that uses a stated controlling idea as transition to the body paragraphs. §Avoid repetition of key ideas by adding details that answer the reader’s who, what, why, when, where and how questions. More importantly, develop the "so what. “ §Avoid repetition by stating key ideas with synonyms, pronouns, words that are more specific or general, descriptive or figurative language, nicknames or proper nouns (if suited to the text) and words or phrases that reveal your point of view. Do this activity before writing the first draft and again, if needed, at the editing stage. 12

Persuasive Writing with the Audience in Mind Topic: Fast Food Brainstorming Why I (the Writer) Want Fast Food Served in the school cafeteria Fast food taste great. Fast food will make the lunch hour seem like a social event with my friends. Thinking about Why This Idea Works or Does Not Work for My Assigned Audience, the Principal The principal has to stick to a budget and make parents happy, so taste isn’t a good enough reason. The principal wants us to eat and learn, not eat and play. Changing My Idea to Make It Fit (If I Need To) or Expanding It If It Works Change the idea • We are currently wasting money because we don’t eat the food that’s served and it’s thrown away. • Serving fast food, even once a week, would prevent waste and end up costing less than the current menu Change and then expand If we have a true break in the middle of the day we will be better students. • Fast food will make lunch feel like a social event without adding any time to the lunch hour. • We’ll get “visiting” out of our system and pay attention when we get back to class. • One meal won’t ruin our health. 13

Persuasive Signals for a Unifying Concept To Show The Reader The Writer Is Building on Points Already Covered or That More Points Follow, Instead of My First Reason, My Second, My Third a final reason and finally furthermore likewise next too again another in addition more other with also for example last of all moreover similarly 14

Persuasive Signals for Support of a Generalization To Let The Reader Know A Specific Example of the More General Point is Coming Next, to Move the Reader from “What” to “So What” or “Why” for example just as happened to X such as to illustrate for instance much like that is in the same way that specifically to demonstrate 15

Persuasive Signals for Comparison Contrast and Counter Argument To Move The Reader Through Changes in Point of View While I respect Some believe that … While others While there is merit in your point of view On the other hand While there is value in what you are proposing Nevertheless While you may believe that 16

Persuasive Signals for Comparison Contrast To Announce To The Reader/Audience That The Writer Is Aware of Different Points of View although even though on the contrary still but however on the other hand while conversely in spite of otherwise despite nevertheless rather 17

Persuasive Signals for Comparison Contrast To Indicate to The Reader That The Writer Sees Similarities and/or Differences Between Points of View on the Issue also and different from however like much as same although best either less more than opposite too compared to better even less than most or 18

Persuasive Signals for Cause Effect To Show The Reader the Consequences or Results of the Ideas The Writer Has Discussed as a result of due to if…then since therefore whether because from in order that so thus while consequently hence resulting from so that unless yet 19

Persuasive Signals for Problem Solution To Identify the Problem or Problems A concern I have A concern we share A serious matter A little-known problem A well-known problem To Signal the Solutions and Value of the Writer’s Ideas One way of correcting. . . An easy and inexpensive method/plan/solution A remedy An alternative to A better choice to deal with X A way to fix 20

Improving the ORGANIZATION Domain FROM A LOOSE LIST TO AN ESSAY WITH A PLAN An Ineffective Strategy Support – A List of Unrelated Ideas Fast food tastes good. Fast food is cheap. Teens like fast food. A List that Lacks An Underlying Plan An Effective Strategy –Sample I Supporting Ideas Linked to a Unifying Concept Each idea is related to the Students attend school to topic but the ideas are not learn about academics and logically linked to each other. about life. The third idea (teen likes) repeats the first two rather than further elaborating the writer’s position. That is, teen like fast food because it tastes good and they can afford it. School is the perfect place to learn how diet affects us. We can study, do research and even experiment. Underlying Plan Based on Unifying Concept All the supporting ideas focus on and thus support a single concept: High school is the time and place to learn about health. School may be the only place some students will learn good nutrition. Note: These ideas are “too small” to develop 21

Improving the ORGANIZATION Domain FROM A LOOSE LIST TO AN ESSAY WITH A PLAN An Effective Strategy--Sample II Supporting Ideas Connected on the Basis of Problem-Solution Underlying Plan Problems • food (and therefore money) is being wasted • students are complaining about the cafeteria menu • your time is being spent on this issue but you have more important things to do • you have to balance giving students what they want with doing what’s right The essay would begin by identifying the problem and the principal’s role in solving that problem. The writer would then follow with easy, appealing solutions. The final bullet in the Problem list provides an effective conclusion. Solutions • Adding fast food to the menu could save money because students would “clean their plates” and you would not need as many cafeteria workers. • Fast food offerings could be limited to one day a week (Fast Food Friday) which would improve attendance and prevent health conscious students and parents from complaining. • Local fast food chains could be required to provide scholarships which would help the school’s money situation. • The money you save could be used to provide better tasting healthy food (purchase ingredients, send the cooks to school) • Putting a group of students in charge of surveying students to select the new menu would teach us responsibility and free up your time to deal with other problems. 22

The Issue: Whether or not to serve fast food in the school cafeteria Writer's Position on the Issue: No Audience: Principal Focusing Statement: Spending the day in a kids' museum taught me the dangers of fast food. I’m changing what I think about fast food! I'm looking at my future if I keep eating the greasy food I love When I get to the end I'm stuck in disgusting, sticky plaque the color of vomit High Point I back out of the tunnel before I get stuck for life. I catch up with my family. My brother is "shopping" for fruits and vegetables. The tunnel keeps getting narrower Along the way I read signs about food and exercise, especially junk food To get away from the pest I crawl into an artery tunnel Conflict Introduced Description: I do everything I can to get my parents to let me stay in the hotel while they take my annoying little brother to a museum called The Health Adventure. This wasn't so dumb after all Resolution Closure and connection to the issue: I promise to eat less junk food and to educate my friends. Unless we want a heart attack served with those fries we should keep our current menu. 23

The Counter Argument In Counter Argument the writer sets himself up as the expert, the authority on a different point of view. To write effective counter argument, the writer must learn to think like the reader-audience, to stand, momentarily in their shoes. The thought process requires the writer to • be clear about what he/she wants and why • identify each of the reader-audience’s objections to his/her position and the reasons he/she have taken that stance • offer a well-thought out reply i. e. , to counter to each objection • elaborate each counter argument so that it is fully understood by the reader-audience 24

THE COUNTER ARGUMENT THOUGHT PROCESS WHAT DOES THE WRITER WANT? WHAT THE WRITER KNOWS ABOUT THE TOPICSPECIFIC AUDIENCE OBJECTIONS THE AUDIENCE IS LIKELY TO HAVE TO WHAT THE WRITER WANTS IDEAS THE WRITER CAN USE TO COUNTER THE OBJECTIONS 25

Development and Organizational Strategies for Persuasive Writing Method: The Counter Argument (Addresses the Reader’s Concerns) Portion of the Essay Content of the Essay Introduction • Acknowledges and then reviews the widely held viewpoint on the issue, generally the audience’s point of view • Makes the issue or problem clear • Does not reveal the writer's supporting ideas • Ends with a transition to the body of the essay, introducing the writer’s differing viewpoint on the issue. Body • Multiple paragraphs (no magic number) that present the writer’s logic for holding his or her different point of view • Each of the audience’s (objections opposing arguments or reasons) are presented and countered with logic or an appeal to emotions • The writer’s counterarguments are thoroughly developed, distinctive, not repetitious or overlapping • Counterarguments are logically sequenced based on their actual content (for example, time sequence, order of importance, then and now…) Conclusion • Avoids repetition of ideas already covered • Avoids cliché • Evolves out of the writer’s specific arguments • Reminds the audience of the larger controversial issue and value of varying perspectives on the issue 26

TOPIC OR ISSUE: Should fast food be served in the school cafeteria? WRITER’S POSITION ON THE ISSUE: No AUDIENCE: Principal What the Audience Thinks about the Issue: The Reader's Concern "While many people think that. . . " The Writer's Counter Argument "I believe there is another side to the issue. . . " A. There is a demand for fast food Reminder of leadership role B. Too much food is thrown away Waste is a problem but eating poorly is a bigger one. C. The school needs money Money is mentioned as a way of demonstrating the writer understands the principal’s responsibilities D. Saying no will be unpopular Some students, like me, will help you convince other students. Leaders have to do what's unpopular. E. Parents, not educators, are responsible for what teens eat. • While it’s true that. . . what we learn at school also influences us. • My parents may complain if you. . . • Some parents don’t know themselves. . • My parents stick to the healthy items. 27

The Problem Solution Essay Rhetorical Unit Introduction Content of the Problem Solution Essay • • • Body • • • Conclusion • • Makes the nature of the problem clear through definition or description May identify a series of related problems May argue for the seriousness of the problem, giving a series of consequences May acknowledge the audience's role in solving the problem Ends with a transition to the body of the essay, suggesting a solution is forthcoming The writer’s analysis of the problem and the possible solutions are thoroughly developed Multiple paragraphs (no magic number) that present the writer’s logic for holding his or her point of view If different solutions are proposed, they begin with the ones the writer rejects Appeals to the audience to help solve the problem or accept the writer's solution Brings the argument to a close Avoids cliché Evolves out of the writer’s specific arguments 28

THE PROBLEM SOLUTION THOUGHT PROCESS WHAT DOES THE WRITER WANT? WHAT IS IMPORTANT TO THE AUDIENCE? (THE INDIVIDUAL WHO HOW THE WRITER’S PLAN WILL WORK RESULTS OF THE WRITER’S PLANS CAN GIVE THE WRITER WHAT HE/SHE WANTS) ADVANTAGES OF THE PLAN FOR THE AUDIENCE ADVANTAGES FOR THE AUDIENCE 29

Introductions that Engage the Reader and Set the Stage for the Writer’s Position on the Issue • Setting the stage with description • Placing the issue in a broader, more meaningful context • Identifying multiple points of view, followed by the position the writer will defend • A brief, compelling anecdote The Introduction Often Ends with a Sentence or Two that Announces the Writer’s Position 30

Sample Introduction: Setting the Stage with Description It’s almost lunchtime here at Georgia High. I close my eyes and imagine the mushy green beans and dry, stringy chicken that await me. Oh, and don’t forget the styrofoam granola bar for desert. Does this sound like a teen’s food fantasy? I think not! Principal O’Connor, while fast food is not healthy, it does have potential benefits for our beloved school. 31

Sample Introduction: Placing the Issue in a Broader, More Meaningful Context Being a teenager is both challenging and rewarding. One of the best ways for us to grow without getting seriously hurt is to make choices that have consequences. High school is a time and place for us learn. Even something as trivial as whether or not to eat fast food for lunch provides the opportunity for important life lessons. 32

Sample Introduction: Identifying Multiple Points of View Followed by the Position the Writer Will Defend Our parents send us to school to learn enough to get into college or get a good job. They assume that the school is safe and probably never give a thought to the food that’s served. Ask the teachers about lunch and they think “yeah, a few minutes of peace and quiet with my teacher friends. ” For me and my fellow students, though, the topic of school lunches is a big concern. If we add fast food choices to the menu, you will make parents, teachers, students, and yourself very happy. Happy students are well-behaved individuals who want to learn! 33

Sample Introduction: A Brief, Compelling Anecdote I’ll never hear their insults again. I’ll never watch them watching me as I add a desert to my tray. After all, I paid for it and what harm can one desert do to my 300 pounds. Nope, I won’t vomit in the bathroom before returning to class. I won’t cry. I won’t diet. I’ll just swallow this whole calorie-free bottle of pills. Principal O’Connor, while I don’t know what obese teens think when contemplating suicide, just the possibility this could happen here makes me oppose serving fast food for lunch at Georgia High. 34

Conclusions that Bring the Writer’s Argument to a Close • Remind the reader/rater/audience of the essence of the argument (without repetition) • Extend the argument from the immediate issue to a more meaningful context • Remind the audience of personal connections to the issue • Provide resolution to a problem or make a recommendation that is reasonable or appealing to the audience 35

The Style Domain EVIDENCE OF AUDIENCE AWARENESS IN PERSUASIVE ESSAYS Presence of Evidence – What the Writer Does Absence of Evidence Identifies the Audience Address to the Audience Appeal –Logic Appeal- Emotion • Writer writes to self • First Person-”I want you to…” • Direct Address- • Knowledge of the subject establishes writer as an authority • Relates by including self-”I think we should…” If we take a stand…” • Explains “what” or “who” rather than assuming audience knows. • Asks audience to consider writer’s situation or circumstances • Word choice conflicts with or contradicts the assigned audience • Major Supporting Ideas/Information/Examples and /or Details are Inappropriate to Audience • Reference to audience switches often enough to be confusing • Writer attacks, threatens, or insults the audience “Dear Principal…” • Second person-”You should…” “Dear Mrs. Walker…” • Thoughtful Explicitness • Includes supporting points that are compelling to the particular audience • Relates to goals of audience“As and American…” • Introduction sets the stage or hooks the audience • Conclusion gets the reader thinking • Language suits the audience and purpose • Writer “gets close” and “steps back” • Draws comparison between self and audience • Acknowledges audience's perspective, beliefs, values, and/or ideas • Avoids clichés 36

How Writers Make Decisions to Frame Their Ideas to Influence the Audience Examples of Subject-Specific Word Choice that Reveals the Writer’s Point of View and Presents the Writer’s Point of View in a Favorable Light and the Alternatives in an Unfavorable Light To oppose serving fast food in the school cafeteria • The obesity epidemic • Gross, greasy, globules of fat left on the plate where tasty fries used to be • Heartburn To support serving fast food served in the school cafeteria • Americans are free to choose whether it’s where to live, what to worship, or even what to eat for lunch • The tantalizing aroma of everyone’s favorite vegetable, the french fry • What teen wants to be known as “granola boy”? 37

How Writers Frame Their Ideas to Make Them Persuasive Sample Topic: Course to Add to Prepare HS Students for Real Life To establish the positive nature of the solution (the new course) To establish the seriousness of the problem 1. 2. My brother is dodging bullets in Iraq and I’m dodging insults in the hallway. Needing to know the difference between mitosis and meiosis ends with the graduation test. Needing to know the difference between right and wrong is a lifetime lesson. 1. 2. Knowing how to defend myself is essential whether I’m in a war zone or a mall. Facts are important whether we are taking tests or choosing presidential candidates. What is even more important, though, is knowing that cheating is wrong, whether you did it to pass a test you didn’t study for or because you think you’re “above the law” like some of our Presidents. 38

What Writers Say to Show They Are Persuading Acknowledging Varied Points of View—Speaking to the Audience • • • You might find reason to disagree, but. . . You might be asking yourself how we can. . . If you are saying that we do not. . . It’s important to keep in mind that. . . We all know that. . . Most people do not know that. . . It is my belief. . . I would like to argue that. . . Research shows. . . 9 out of 10. . . 39

What Writers Say to Show They Are Being Persuasive Direct Address to the Audience • • . . . And yes, that’s a compliment. . . . And I hope you. . . For you to consider my suggestion. . . I might have the answer to your question if you keep reading my letter. . . . One main thing you are probably looking for. . . Trust me. . . I understand that you need. . . How would we. . Might be what you’re thinking right now. Here are my thoughts on that. 40

What Writers Say to Show They Are Persuading Words That Show the Writer’s Point of View • • • . . . should. . . would want to. . . the best person. . . an outstanding choice. . . extreme inspiration. . . especially eager. . . incredible. . . fantastic. . . inspire. . . less fortunate. . . 41

Value-laden Word Choice Words Expressing the Writer’s Position on the Issue approve believe conclude encourage endorse reassure recommend recognize spent time considering support 42

Value-laden Word Choice Words to Establish the Value of the Writer’s Point of View believable compelling convincing documented expert opinion persuasive plausible 43

Showing Audience Awareness Words and Phrases to Address Reader Concerns and Acknowledge Disagreement that the Audience Might Have Before Hearing the Writer’s Point of View agree within limits consider give consideration to seen from our/my point of view reasonable reason with if you give it a chance 44

Showing Audience Awareness Words to Address the Audience and Make Them Receptive to the Writer’s Point of View by Acknowledging the Value of Their Point of View accept admire assistance appreciate commend compliment cooperate honorable reinforce respect supportive thought-provoking tried and true trustworthy 45

Voices That Persuade • Formal • Conversational • Balanced; fair • Humorous • Authoritative and wellinformed based on personal experience • Authoritative and wellbalanced based on “data” and/or “research” • Concerned 46

Voices that Do Not Persuade • Insulting • Threatening • Rude • Indifferent • Flat • Noncommittal 47

A Fact Sheet on the Fast Food Topic In favor of fast food Opposed to fast food 1. Working parents don’t have time to cook—more than half of all mothers work outside the home 2. FF restaurants provide info on calories and salt content so customers can choose healthier options 1. Health risks—childhood diabetes, high blood pressure, weight 2. Obesity rates increasing— may be as high as half the population 3. Have to search (internet) to get actual nutrition info 48

A Fact Sheet on the Fast Food Topic • Well-known facts (so limit in the essay if possible) • Little-known or otherwise interesting facts 1. Popularity of fast food 2. Advertising 1. Movie “Supersize Me” shows how quickly damage is done 2. Evidence that the sugar and other ingredients is addictive— like tobacco 3. Oversized servings make us think we’re getting more for our money—but don’t cost the fast food chains much more to produce 49

GHSWT Scoring Rubrics © Georgia Department of Education 50

GHSWT Scoring Rubrics © Georgia Department of Education 51

GHSWT Scoring Rubrics © Georgia Department of Education 52

GHSWT Scoring Rubrics © Georgia Department of Education 53