Public Lecture for Engineering Graduate School Winter Semester

Public Lecture for Engineering Graduate School Winter Semester, 2016　 3799 -027 Advanced Academic Writing rd 3 lecture 16: 50 -18: 35, Wednesday Eng. 2 nd bldg. Room 211 Instructor: Kumiko Morimura, Ph. D. Yolanda Alberto, Ph. D. Global Ware Project Global Center for Innovation in Engineering Education, IIIEE The University of Tokyo ees. seut@gmail. com

How to write a good paper 1. Preparations before starting 2. Construction of an article 3. Technical details 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 1

General structure of a full article • Title, authors, abstract, keywords • Main text (IMRAD) – Introduction – Methods – Results and – Discussion (Conclusion) Completeness, coherence and cohesion • References, acknowledgements and annexes 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 2

In what order is written Personal process depends on your own research Usually in engineering… 1. Data organization (figures and tables) 2. Method, results and discussion In general 3. Conclusion and introduction (literature review) 4. Title and abstract 4. Paper description 3. Technical and scientific support 2. Paper overview 1. Results and discussion 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 3

Abstract Write what you did and what were your findings • This is the first thing people will see before reading your paper, it has to be concise and attractive. • Keep it as short as possible (100 -300 words) • Focus on the results, not the means • A good practice is to write the abstract three times: before, during and after the paper is finished • Do not make references to bibliography or figures/tables in the abstract 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 4

Abstract - Poor example Write clear and simple sentences: “The effects of various design and operating parameters on the performance of the proposed reactor were investigated using a detailed model -based analysis” - What design and operating parameters? - What was the model? - What was the actual effect? 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 5

Abstract - Good example Rewriting that text: “Selectivity decreased by 20% while increasing temperature from 700° to 1000°C at constant pressure. Selectivity increased by 10% with increasing pressure from 1 bar to 5 bar. A redox kinetic model accounted for 87% of the variance in the data. ” 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 6

Abstract format • Format and writing style depend on the journal • Do NOT use symbols, special characters, or math in the title or abstract. (Reason: titles and abstracts go into databases all over the web and most databases can only handle ASCII characters) 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 7

Differences in abstract style A. Human Factors and Ergonomics Society B. American Institute of Astronauts and Astronautics C. Nature Number of words 250 200 150 Voice Active or passive Pasive Active Audience Broad audience Specialized audience Audience outside the discipline It should not cite figures, tables or sections. Describe the treatment. Avoid the use of adjectives for highly technical language Other specific notes Include subheadings 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 8

Grammar/Writing • Verb tense Sentence Verb tense Example Gap/problem Present simple - The main problem is… - This is complicated given that… - Although it is known theoretically that… Content of the paper Present simple - This paper presents a new methodology… - This study reports an improved design… - New numerical results are presented Methodology Past simple - Samples were prepared… - The data obtained was evaluated by… - Two catalysts were examined… Results Past simple Present simple (when referring to facts) - The S-type was found to produce… - Hydrocarbons increased with… - The model is able to predict… - This theory applies to… 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 9

Grammar/Writing • Verb tense Sentence Verb tense Example Results Combination of past simple and present simple - The experiments demosntrated that there is a relationship…. - The results suggested that there are two matrices Achievements Present perfect - This research has revealed that… - We have devised a strategy which allows… - A novel material has been produced with… Applications Present simple - This framework can be used to…. - This approach is suitable for… - This process has a general applicability to… 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 10

Grammar/Writing • Language - Employ keywords and phrases common in your research area, but use language slightly less technical than in the main body to attract a wider audience 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing Glasman-Deal, 2010 11

Write your abstract • Sentence 1. State the background (gap/problem) • Sentence 2. State the general and specific objectives of the research • Sentence 3 and 4. Describe succinctly the methodology • Sentence 5. Indicate the results of the study • Sentence 6. The writer presents the implications of the study (scope and application) 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 12

Introduction • Do not repeat what is written in the abstract • State the objective, scope of the work and background (earlier studies, literature review) • Your introduction must indicate what is the gap in your area of research and what is the scientific interest • Be specific on what do you expect to achieve • Do not mix this section with results, discussion or conclusion 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 13

Introduction in 6 steps A. State the relevance of your research B. Provide some background C. Be specific about the problem you are trying to solve and the current research focus of the field D. Literature review on the general problem E. Mention important research specifically done on this topic and then, explain the gap you are trying to fill F. Describe the contents of your paper and some details regarding the methodology 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 14

Example 1 C E D F A B C E 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 15

Example 2 2 C D A 3 B E F 2016/10/12 2 Advanced Academic Writing 3 16

Literature review • You should write a couple of sentences for each reference relevant to your topic • If several articles discuss the same subject, they can be referenced simultaneously (e. g. Seed et al. , 1983; Robertson 1999; Chang et al. , 2010) • Suggestion: Use a software to organize your references 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 17

Literature review • Some examples are: https: //www. mendeley. com/ https: //www. zotero. org/ http: //www. citeulike. org/ http: //www. qiqqa. com/ • How to start using one? – Ask what people in your research group use – Check if the software is compatible with your operating system and your word processor – Check the websites to see how easy is to use – Look for tutorials and comments 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 18

Mendeley 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 19

Grammar/writing • TENSES - Present simple is used to state facts and truths well known in science “Effective stress is calculated directly from…” “Risk depends on vulnerability and …” - Use past simple to refer to events that happened (literature review) “Scott (1985) proved that…” “In their experiments they found a…” - Use present perfect for sentences that are more relevant to the current situation in your research “Recent studies have suggested that…” “Little attention has been paid to the selection of…” 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 20

Grammar/writing • SENTENCE CONNECTION (Cohesion) - Use of pronouns or pro-forms (it, they, this, these) - Relative clauses (that, which) - As a tip, avoid the use of semicolon to join sentences - Overlapping “… is different in climate change. Actually, in climate change…” 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 21

Grammar/writing - Use sentence connectors Relation between sentences Examples Cause As, because, since, due to, on account of Result Therefore, consequently, hence, so, as a result, which is Contrast However, whereas, but, on the other hand, while Unexpectedness Nevertheless, in spite of, despite, although, even though, regardless of, yet, even so Addition In addition, furthermore, moreover, also, secondly 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 22

Grammar/writing • Voice: passive or active – Be consistent throughout all the paper – Sometimes passive voice may lead to long or awkward sentences, try to write short sentences – In passive voice, it might be difficult to identify the “doer” so you can use a dummy subject “This paper describes…” “This paper presents…” 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 23

Main body of your paper People should understand everything about your experiment by reading the paper. -Materials, methods and procedures -The results obtained under those conditions -Degree of accuracy of data and errors. -Choose appropriate tables and figures (do not repeat data on both of them) 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 24

Methodology • Name all the materials (chemicals and devices) used in the experiment. List standard tests (e. g. , ASTM, JGS) if you used them. • Write the procedures so that anybody can reproduce the result • Write common details briefly so you can focus on the novelty of your research • Include schematic diagrams and summarize the tests conditions in tables • “This is exactly what I did, I did it carefully and I had good reasons for doing it this way” (Glasman-Deal, 2010) 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 25

Grammar/writing • Try to avoid as much as possible the verbs do, perform, make, use. They deviate the attention from the actual action. Avoid: “When using the infrared camera, the calibration was done between -20°C to 120°C” Instead, use: “The infrared camera was calibrated from -20°C to 120°C” 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 26

Grammar/writing • Misleading adverbs 2016/10/12 Adverb Imprecise Clear Extremely The results are extremely dependent on stress level The results depend on stress level Significantly Time increases significantly with temperature Time doubles for every increase in 5°C Very, a lot There were leakages very often Leakages were found at a frequency of 2 h-1 Approximately The model took approximately between 10 to 15 minutes The model took from 10 to 15 minutes Advanced Academic Writing 27

Results • This is the main part of your paper • You must summarize the data in graphs and tables and discuss the trends in the text • You should be able to present your results talking about: – Sequence – Frequency – Quantity – Causality 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 28

Results/Discussion Keeping hard facts and personal interpretations separated is very important in academia. Results: (What you did and) what were the results Discussion: What the results mean - Depending on the structure of your paper you may want to have different sections for these two parts. 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 29

Pie chart Charts Bar graph Fig. 1. A pie chart looks like a pie. The pie chart has 3 "sectors" ("slices" or "shares"). The purple sector makes up 50% of the total. Flow chart Scatter plot Fig 3 A scatter plot shows a series of measurement points. It is similar to a line graph, but in a scatter plot there can be multiple y values for one x value. 2016/10/12 Figure 4 Flowcharts are often used to explain an algorithm or a process, or to visualize a flow of data or materials in a schematic way. Advanced Academic Writing 30

Charts • Your graphs must show good quality, different data should be easily distinguished • Write all the information necessary to understand the graph by itself (axes labels, data label, conditions) • Even if your paper is printed in black and white, all lines and points should be easy to read 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 31

Examples 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 32

More charts and graphs • http: //snowballs. t. u-tokyo. ac. jp 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 33

2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 34

Grammar/writing • Adjectives and the properties Adjective Property Bigger, larger Physical size Higher Height, position Greater Quantity, value Longer Time, length • Avoid the word not (not sensitive – insensitive, not sufficient, insufficient, not necessary, unnecessary) • After writing, if some parts can be removed without changing the meaning, remove them 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 35

Grammar/writing • When talking about your results, use past simple, except for describing graphs, figures and tables • Don’t forget to use connectors Area Words or phrases Sequence Previously, beforehand, at first, at the beginning, then, soon, later, when, at the end, upon, meanwhile Frequency Every time, invariably, habitually, as a rule, generally, regularly, commonly, sometimes, often, rarely, barely Quantity Negligible, noticeable, fewer, infinitesimal, marginal, slight Causality Due to, stem from, derived, accompanied, arise from, associated, connected to, generated 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 36

Discussion • Develop your view from the results in an accurate logic. You should interpret the data • Assess your result in relation to the other’s results. If your results are inconsistent with previous research, highlight the differences and explain the reason • Find the problem of your study • Mention how your study will be proceeded in the future • Has to have a logical assertion • Explain the significance of this new invention and how it contributes to the existing knowledge • Be critical on your study 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 37

Describe Compare Evaluate Criticize Conclude • Describe In the motorcycle industry, it is an important process used to join parts. • Compare In comparison with …. • Evaluate In our study , … was observed… • Criticize …. remains questionable …… • Conclude It was concluded that …… 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 38

Conclusion • • Write the most important result Itemize the results Rephrase the hypothesis Mention what you should do next Paper Paragraph Introduction(hypothesis) Experiment(supporting) Topic sentence Supporting sentences Conclusion 2016/10/12 = Concluding sentence Advanced Academic Writing 39

Correct these sentences. Wordiness • It has been found that CO 2 and H 2 O formation has been reduced at high temperatures • Conversion over 90% was achieved with a residence time of 20 minutes • A campus rally was attended by more than a thousand students. Five students were arrested by campus police for disorderly conduct, while several others are charged by campus administrators with organizing a public meeting without being issued a permit to do so. • In the not too distant future, college freshmen must all become aware of the fact that there is a need for them to make contact with an academic adviser concerning the matter of a major. • In our company there are wide-open opportunities for professional growth with a company that enjoys an enviable record for stability in the dynamic atmosphere of aerospace technology. • Some people believe in capital punishment, while other people are against it; there are many opinions on this subject. 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 40

Combine these sentences into one concise sentence • 1. The cliff dropped to reefs seventy-five feet below. The reefs below the steep cliff were barely visible through the fog. 2. Their car is gassed up. It is ready for the long drive. The drive will take all night. 3. Sometimes Stan went running with Blanche. She was a good athlete. She was on the track team at school. 4. Taylor brought some candy back from Europe. It wasn't shaped like American candy. The candy tasted kind of strange to him. 5. Government leaders like to mention the creation of new jobs. They claim that these new jobs indicate a strong economy. They don't mention that low-wage jobs without benefits and security have replaced many good jobs. 2016/10/12 Advanced Academic Writing 41