Organizing and Writing Business Messages Mary Ellen Guffey

Organize Your Data Group Ideas into Patterns Direct pattern for receptive audiences Indirect pattern for unreceptive audiences 2

Audience Response Determines Pattern of Organization If pleased If mildly interested If neutral Direct Pattern Good News or Main Idea 3

Audience Response Determines Pattern of Organization If displeased or disappointed If unwilling or uninterested If hostile Indirect Pattern Bad News or Main Idea 4

Patterns Direct Pattern n n n n Saves the reader time Sets a proper frame of mind Prevents frustration Routine requests / response Orders / Acknowledgments Nonsensitive memos / emails Informational reports Informational oral presentations Indirect Pattern Respects feelings of audience Encourages a fair hearing Minimizes a negative reaction n n n Bad news Ideas that require persuasion Sensitive news 5

Create Effective Sentences n n n Use short sentences. Emphasize important ideas. Use the active voice for most sentences. Use the passive voice to deemphasize the performer and/or to be tactful. Avoid dangling and misplaced modifiers. 6

Use Short Sentences Sentence Length Comprehension Rate 8 words 15 words 19 words 28 words 100% 90% 80% 50% Source: American Press Institute 7

Emphasize Important Ideas Position the most important idea at the beginning of the sentence. n Make sure the most important idea is the subject of the sentence. n Place the main idea in a short sentence. n All production and administrative personnel will meet on May 23, at which time we will announce a new plan of salary incentives On May 23 all personnel will meet to learn about salary incentives. 8

Use the Active Voice for Most Sentences n Active voice: We lost money. n Active voice: I sent the e-mail message yesterday. (The subject is the performer. ) 9

Use Passive Voice To Deemphasize the Performer and/or To Be Tactful n Passive voice: Money was lost (by us). n Passive voice: The e-mail message was sent yesterday (by me). (Passive voice test: Ask “By whom? ” If you can fill in the performer, the verb is probably in the passive voice. ) 10

Avoid Dangling Modifiers n Dangling modifier: To be hired, an application must be completed. Revision: To be hired, you must complete an application. Revision: To be hired, fill out an application. (In the last example, you is understood to be the subject of fill. ) 11

Avoid Misplaced Modifiers n Misplaced modifier: The patient was referred to a psychiatrist with a severe emotional problem. Revision: The patient with a severe emotional problem was referred to a psychiatrist. 12

Create Effective Paragraphs n Discuss only one topic in each paragraph n Compose short paragraphs for effective business messages n Arrange sentences in a strategic plan n Link ideas to build coherence n Use transitional expressions for coherence 13

Discuss One Topic in each Paragraph n Group similar ideas together n Start a new paragraph for each new topic n Keep paragraph length at 8 to 10 lines maximum 14

Arrange Sentences in a Strategic Plan n Direct Plan: main sentence followed by supporting sentences (for defining, classifying, illustrating, and describing ideas) n Indirect Plan: supporting sentences followed by main sentence (for describing causes followed by effects) 15

Direct vs Indirect Paragraph Direct approach: I recommend we establish an optional “business casual” policy that allows consultants to dress casually, if they wish. According to a recent poll, more than half of all white-collar workers are now dressing casually at work. In our own business, our consultants say they stand out like “sore thumbs” because they dress in traditional suits. Indirect approach: According to a recent poll, more than half of all white-collar workers are now dressing casually at work. In our own business, our consultants say they stand out like “sore thumbs” because they dress in traditional suits. Therefore, I recommend we establish an optional “business casual” policy that allows consultants to dress casually, if they wish. 16

Use Transitions for Coherence Continuation n n n Also Moreover First. . . Second. . . For that reason, Therefore, Additionally and n n n n Pause Reversal For instance For example, Strictly speaking, In other words, In effect, As a result, or n n n However, On the other hand, Conversely, Nevertheless, Otherwise, but 17