Managing Challenging Behaviors Why kids act the way

Managing Challenging Behaviors Why kids act the way they do Parents Place Presented by Mark Purcell, Psy. D.

WORKSHOP OUTLINE Why kids act the way they do Causes for problem behaviors in children Collaborative Problem Solving Principles of Positive Discipline Anger Management Interventions �Aggression Replacement Training (ART) � Anger Management Group �DBT Skills for Positive Behavior Change � Validation � Behavior Chain Analysis

Why Kids Act the Way they Do Biology Heredity Temperament Cognitive Abilities/Challenges Psychological Environment Self-Image Self-Esteem Attachment Peers Family Social Support School

Different Reasons Why Kids May Do What they Do �Behavioral – may be reinforced in some way �Example: Tantrums to achieve desired outcome �Intermitent reinforcement �Emotional – may have trouble managing feelings �Difficulty regulating emotions �Cognitive – may have trouble problem solving �Difficulty perceiving choices or ways to resolve conflict

A-B-C’s of Behavior �A-B-C’s of Anger �A= Antecedent (What triggered the problem? ) �B= Behavior (What did child do? ) �C=Consequence (To self and others)

Collaborative Problem Solving �A more compassionate understanding and approach to behaviorally challenged kids… �The challenging behavior by children is due to lack of appropriate skills rather than intentional �Understand the emotion/reason behind the behavior.

Collaborative Problem Solving �Why are challenging kids challenging? �Kids do well if they can �Doing well is always preferable to not doing well. �If kids have the skills they would choose to do well.

Collaborative Problem Solving �When are Challenging Kids Challenging? �When demands/expectations exceed skills �Determine situations that are most challenging to child �Assessment of: � Lagging Skills � Unsolved Problems

Collaborative Problem Solving �What behaviors challenging kids exhibit when they don’t have the skills to respond adaptively to demands? �They let us know through numerous behaviors that they are struggling �It is more important to understand the Why and When a child engages in challenging behavior than the What s/he does.

Collaborative Problem Solving �What can be done differently… �Collaboratively solving the problem helps kids learn new coping strategies �When adults impose will/consequences, child’s frustration increases and leads to more negative behaviors.

Collaborative Problem Solving �Three Steps: 1. Empathy Step – validate and understand what the child is feeling and why 2. Define the Problem – entering into solve the problem with the child 3. Invitation – Adult and child brainstorm solutions so as to arrive at a plan that is realistic and mutually satisfying.

Sequence of Conflict Cycle � Stressful event ACTIVATES youth’s irrational beliefs (“Everyone hates me”) � Beliefs TRIGGER intense feelings � Feelings DRIVE inappropriate behaviors � Inappropriate behaviors INCITE others � Others MIRROR negative behaviors � Negative REACTION escalates conflict into self-defeating power struggle � Reinforcement of SELFFULFILLING PROPHECY Youth’s Self-Concept Irrational Beliefs Adult/Peer Reactions Youth’s Observable Behavior Stressful Event Youth’s Feelings

Validation • Search for, recognize and reflect to the client the validity inherent in his/her response to events. Validation Level Goal of Interaction One Listen Non-Judgmentally Two Accurate Reflection Three Articulate Unspoken Thoughts and Feelings Four Understanding Historical Background of Behavior • Validate Feeling • Then Address Behavior • Do Not Validate the Invalid • 9: 1 Ratio – 9 Validations – 1 Confrontation Five Six Confirming Thoughts, Behaviors and Feelings Based on Current Circumstances Radical Genuineness & Authenticity

Chain Analysis Example Good mood night before Argued with teacher Bullied at Recess Stayed up late Teacher criticized Hit other student Tired and irritable Late for School Suspended

Positive Discipline IDENTIFYING PROBLEM BEHAVIOR �Identify underlying need behind behavior �Identify problematic behaviors (not youth) �Clarify desired behavior �Reinforce positive behaviors �Discover youth strengths �Provide opportunities for belonging �Seek mutual responsibility among youth �Encourage use of “I” Statements

Positive Discipline RESPONDING TO PROBLEM BEHAVIOR �Set clear consistent consequences �Validate youth feelings first �Identify problematic behaviors �Offer cooling off place not punishment �Make first request for adaptive behavior �Reinforce (+) or Make second request �Remind youth of consequences �Reinforce (+) or Implement Consequences

Positive Discipline EFFECTIVE INTERACTIONS �Ignore (-) behaviors / Attend (+) behaviors �Even, calm, yet firm tone of voice �Remain matter-of-fact �Model 3 R’s: �Recognize mistake �Reconcile �Resolve

Know Yourself �Learning to say “No” �Be aware of “buttons that get pushed” during confrontation �Be Consistent �Be Non-Emotional �Be Empathic

Aggression Replacement Training (ART) Anger Control Group Outline 1. A, B, C’s of Aggressive Behavior 2. Triggers 3. Cues & Anger Reducers 4. Reminders 5. Self-Evaluation 6. Thinking Ahead 7. Angry Behavior Cycle 8. Rehearsal of Full Sequence

A-B-C’s of Aggressive Behavior �Explain nature of emotions �Physical response to stimuli �A-B-C’s of Anger �A= Antecedent (What triggered the problem? ) �B= Behavior (What did you do? ) �C=Consequence (To self and others)

Triggers �Introduce Hassle Log �Provides accurate picture of conflicts that occur during the week �Helps group members learn what makes them angry �Provides material for role-plays �Explain Triggers �External Triggers �Internal Triggers �Role Play Triggers

Cues & Anger Reducers �Define anger and personal cues �Self-Define what anger personally feels like �Identify Physiological Cues of Anger �Anger Reducers �Deep Breathing and Relaxation �Counting backwards �Positive Visualizations �Role Play �Triggers + Cues + Anger Reducers

Reminders �Self-Instructional Statements �Used during potentially challenging or provoking situations �Examples �“Take it Easy, ” “Relax, ” “Chill Out” �Model Use of Reminders �Role Play �Triggers+Cues+Anger Reducers+Reminders

Self-Evaluation �Group Members Self-Evaluate: 1. How well they handled a conflict 2. Reward themselves for handling it well 3. Find out how they could have handled it better � Develop list of self-rewarding & self-coaching statements � Role Play: � Triggers + Cues + Anger Reducers + Reminders + Self Evaluation

Thinking Ahead �Review A-B-C Model �Help members think ahead about what the C (consequence) will likely be of behavior �Identify Short & Long Term consequences of being aggressive �Internal & External consequences of being aggressive �Role Play: � Triggers + Cues + Anger Reducers + Reminders + Self Evaluation

Review & Practice Anger Control Strategies Triggers Cues Anger Reducer Reminder Self. Evaluation

Dialectical Behavior Therapy �Mindfulness �Distress Tolerance �Interpersonal Effectiveness �Validation �Behavior Chain Analysis

States of Mind Emotiona l Mind W I S E M I N D Rational Mind

States of Mind Emotional Mind Wise Mind Rational Mind Feeling - Centered Logical thinking is difficult Facts are distorted to match mood You may be impulsive or “Hot Headed” Emotions are in control Emotions influence and control your thinking & behavior Operate in “Emo” Mode Thoughts + Feelings Integrate best of emotional & rational minds Viewing situation with loving detachment Observing & responding Not Intense Reacting Not Cool Distancing Operate in “Wise” Mode Thought – centered Emotions are ignored Focus on Facts & Logic Feelings of self & others not considered Cool and detached Operate in “Robot” Mode

Distress Tolerance Skills Pro’s & Cons of Target ACCEPTS for Distraction �Activity �Contribute �Comparison �(Opposite) Emotion �Thoughts Behavior Problem Behavior Continue Change �Senses (Self-Sooth) �Teach Radical Acceptance Pro Con

Validation • Search for, recognize and reflect to the client the validity inherent in his/her response to events. Validation Level Goal of Interaction One Listen Non-Judgmentally Two Accurate Reflection Three Articulate Unspoken Thoughts and Feelings Four Understanding Historical Background of Behavior • Validate Feeling • Then Address Behavior • Do Not Validate the Invalid • 9: 1 Ratio – 9 Validations – 1 Confrontation Five Six Confirming Thoughts, Behaviors and Feelings Based on Current Circumstances Radical Genuineness & Authenticity

Chain Analysis Example Good mood night before Argued with teacher Bullied at Recess Stayed up late Teacher criticized Hit other student Tired and irritable Late for School Suspended

Creating Environment of Mutual Respect Control �May provide immediate solution �Necessary for Safety �Decreases Self Esteem �Punishment Based �Provides Attention to Negative Behaviors Change �Harder to implement �Long term benefits �Teaches Social Skills �Teaches Mutuality �Increases Self Esteem �Attention to Positive Behaviors

Creating an Atmosphere of Mutual Respect �Encourage Mutuality �Involve Youth in Group Expectations �Increase Group Cohesion �Maintain Safety – Physical/Emotional �Expectation of Respect �Willingness to Negotiate �Group Reinforcement: Goals & Rewards �Agreed Upon Consequences