LANGUAGE BARRIER AND BRIDGE CHAPTER TOPICS 5 Language

LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE CHAPTER TOPICS • • • 5 Language is Symbolic Understandings and Misunderstandings The Impact of Language Gender and Language Culture and Language Looking Out/Looking In Thirteenth Edition

Language is Symbolic • The Natural World • Smoke means something is burning • A fever means someone is ill • Language is Symbolic • Connection between words and the ideas or things they represent is arbitrary LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 2

Understanding and Misunderstanding • Understanding Words • Semantic rules • “Bikes” are for riding and “books” are for reading • Equivocation • Statements that have more then one commonly accepted definition • Newspaper Headlines: • “Family catches fire just in time. ” • “ 20 -year friendship ends at the altar. ” • “Trees can break wind. ” LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 3

Understanding and Misunderstanding • Relative Language • Words that gain their meaning by comparison • • Do you attend a large or small school? Fast and slow Smart and stupid Short and long • Static Evaluation • Statements that contain or imply the word is lead to mistaken assumptions about people LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 4

Understandings and Misunderstandings • Abstraction • Is vague in nature • Behavior language is specific to things people do or say • Abstraction Ladder • Abstract language can lead to miscommunication Figure 5. 1 Page 165 LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 5

Understandings and Misunderstandings • Syntactic Rules • Govern the grammar of language • Pragmatic Rules • Govern the way speech works in everyday interaction • Consider the difference between: • I love you • I love ya • I luv U LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 6

Understandings and Misunderstandings • Pragmatic Rules • What do infer by the following sentences? • “Would you like a drink? ” • “Would you like something to drink? ” • Pragmatic Rules of Email • When reading an email what do you think when you come across CAPITAL LETTERS! LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 7

The Impact of Language • Naming and Identity • Names are more than just a simple means of identification • They shape the way others think of us • They shape the way we view ourselves • 1900’s most popular names • Bertha, Mildred and Ethel • 2008’s most popular names • Madison, Ava and Chloe LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 8

The Impact of Language • Affiliation • Speech can build and demonstrate solidarity with others • Convergence • The process of adapting one’s speech style to match others • Divergence • Speaking in a way that emphasizes one’s differences from others LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 9

The Impact of Language • Power difference between two statements: • “Excuse me, sir. I hate to say this, but I. . . I guess I won’t be able to turn in the assignment on time. I had a personal emergency, and. . . well. . . it was just impossible to finish it by today. I’ll have it on your desk Monday, OK? ” • “I won’t be able to turn in the assignment on time. I had a personal emergency, and it was impossible to finish by today. I’ll have it on your desk Monday. ” LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 10

The Impact of Language • Powerless Language • Hedges: • “I’m kinda disappointed. . . ” “I think we should. . . ” “I guess I’d like to. . . ” • Hesitations: • “Uh, can I have a minute of your time? ” • “Well, we could try this idea. . . ” • “I wish you would—er—try to be on time. ” • Tag questions: • “It’s about time we got started, isn’t it? ” • “Don’t you think we should give it another try? ” LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 11

The Impact of Language • Disruptive Language • Three linguistic habits to avoid • Fact-Opinion Confusion Fact Opinion You forgot my birthday. You keep interrupting me. You tell a lot of ethnic jokes. You don’t care about me. You’re a control freak. You’re a bigot. LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 12

The Impact of Language • Disruptive Language • Fact-interference confusion • A: Why are you mad at me? • B: I’m not mad at you. Why have you been so insecure lately? • A: I’m not insecure. It’s just that you've been so critical. • B: What do you mean, “critical? ” I haven’t been critical. . LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 13

The Impact of Language • Disruptive Language • Emotive Language • Seems to describe something but actually announces the speakers attitude toward it If you approve, say If you disapprove, say Thrifty Traditional Extrovert Cautious Cheap Old-fashioned Loudmouth Cowardly LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 14

The Impact of Language • Language of Responsibility • “It” Statements • Note the difference in each set of sentences: • • • “It bothers me when you’re late. ” “I’m worried when you’re late. ” “It’s nice to see you. ” “I’m glad to see you. ” “It’s a boring class. ” “I’m bored in the class. ” LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 15

The Impact of Language • Language of Responsibility • “But” Statements • In each sentence the word but cancels the thought that precedes it: • “You’re really a great person, but I think we should see other people. ” • “You’ve done good work for us, but we’re going to have to let you go. ” • “This paper has some good ideas, but I’m giving you a D grade because it’s late. ” LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 16

The Impact of Language • Language of Responsibility • Questions • Some questions are used to avoid making a declaration • “What are we having for dinner? ” Could mean, “I want to eat out. ” • “How many textbooks are assigned in that class? ” Could mean, “I’m afraid to get into a class with too much reading. ” LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 17

The Impact of Language • Language of Responsibility • “I” and “You” Language • “I” statements accept responsibility for a message • “You” statements express judgment • “You left this place a mess!” • “You didn’t keep your promise!” • “You’re really crude sometimes!” LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 18

The Impact of Language • Language of Responsibility • “I” and “You” Language • An “I” statement has four elements: • • The person’s behavior Your interpretations Your feelings The consequences that the other person’s behavior has for you LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 19

The Impact of Language • Language of Responsibility • “I” and “You” Language • Example: • “I get embarrassed (feeling) when you talk about my bad grades in front of our friends (behavior). I’m afraid they’ll think I’m stupid (interpretation). That’s why I got so worked up last night (consequence). ” LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 20

The Impact of Language • Language of Responsibility • Reservations about “I” language • “I get too angry to use ‘I’ language” • “Even with ‘I’ language, the other person gets defensive” • “ ‘I’ language sounds artificial” LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 21

The Impact of Language • Language of Responsibility • “We” Language • Implies the issue is the concern of both parties • “We need to figure out a budget that doesn’t bankrupt us. ” • “I think we have a problem. We can’t seem to talk about money without fighting. ” LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 22

Gender and Language • Content • Female friends spent more time discussing: • Relationship problems, family, health • Male friends spent more time discussing: • Current events, music, sports, business • Consider the gender’s impact on language: • “I want to talk about important things, like how we’re getting along. All he wants to do talk about the news or what we’ll do this weekend. ” LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 23

Gender and Language • Conversation Style • The myth that women are more talkative than men does not hold up under scientific scrutiny • Men’s speech is characteristically: • More direct, succinct, and task-oriented • Women’s speech is more typically: • indirect, elaborate, and focused on relationships LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 24

Gender and Language • Nongender Variables • The link between gender and language isn’t as clear-cut as it might seem • The language between sexes is more similar than it is different. • One scholar suggested that the popular book, “Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus” should be changed to “Men Are from North Dakota, Women Are from South Dakota. ” LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 25

Culture and Language • Verbal Communication Styles • Low-context cultures • Generally value language to express thoughts, feelings, and ideas as directly as possible. • High-context cultures • Generally value using language to maintain social harmony. • Learn to discover meaning from the context in which a message is delivered: nonverbal behaviors, history of the relationship, etc LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 26

Culture and Language • Verbal Communication Styles • Language and Worldview • Linguistic relativism • The worldview of a culture is shaped and reflected by the language its members speak. • The Eskimos have a large number of words for snow LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 27

Chapter Review • • • Language is Symbolic Understandings and Misunderstandings The Impact of Language Gender and Language Culture and Language LANGUAGE: BARRIER AND BRIDGE 28