INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION San Diego NITM 2015 WHY INTERPERSONAL

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INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION San Diego NITM 2015

INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION San Diego NITM 2015

WHY INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION? “Great leaders are almost always great simplifiers, who can cut through

WHY INTERPERSONAL COMMUNICATION? “Great leaders are almost always great simplifiers, who can cut through argument, debate, and doubt to offer a solution everybody can understand. ” — General Colin Powell “The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. ” — George Bernard Shaw

AT YOUR TABLE, THINK ABOUT: ▪ What do I want to get out of

AT YOUR TABLE, THINK ABOUT: ▪ What do I want to get out of this session? ▪ Write down your answers.

AGENDA Style (for you and others) § Perspective (thoughtful analysis) § Context and adaptability

AGENDA Style (for you and others) § Perspective (thoughtful analysis) § Context and adaptability (what works when) § Channels (what forms it takes) §

STYLE Many ways to think about it ▪ Identify your style ▪ Start to

STYLE Many ways to think about it ▪ Identify your style ▪ Start to apply new knowledge ▪

COMMUNICATING STYLES SURVEY Dr. Paul Mok, founder of CST and TAP ▪ Patented tool

COMMUNICATING STYLES SURVEY Dr. Paul Mok, founder of CST and TAP ▪ Patented tool based on Carl Jung’s work ▪ Administered to 5+ million people in 5, 000+ organizations ▪ Used for training, development, conflict management, & team-building ▪

SURVEY INSTRUCTIONS ▪ ▪ ▪ Take and score your survey Don’t agonize; go with

SURVEY INSTRUCTIONS ▪ ▪ ▪ Take and score your survey Don’t agonize; go with your gut feeling Rank: 6, 4, 3, 1 Score when you’re through Raise your hand for help

SURVEY SAYS… • • • It’s time to interpret your scores… but first: Everyone

SURVEY SAYS… • • • It’s time to interpret your scores… but first: Everyone has all 4 styles No one style is better than another Self-assessment is subject to bias Can change depending on your conditions

RECORD YOUR SCORES ▪ Your style under favorable (normal) conditions Dominant ▪ Secondary ▪

RECORD YOUR SCORES ▪ Your style under favorable (normal) conditions Dominant ▪ Secondary ▪ ▪ Your style under stressful conditions Dominant ▪ Secondary ▪

DO YOU SEE YOURSELF?

DO YOU SEE YOURSELF?

GROUP EXERCISE Leave things at your table ▪ Get with others who share your

GROUP EXERCISE Leave things at your table ▪ Get with others who share your type under stress ▪

GROUP EXERCISE Develop your “Top 5 Tips for Communicating with a _____” ▪ Please

GROUP EXERCISE Develop your “Top 5 Tips for Communicating with a _____” ▪ Please think quietly for a few minutes, then share with your group ▪ Record to flip charts ▪ Be ready to share your tips, on a flip chart, with full group ▪

TIME FOR A BREAK…

TIME FOR A BREAK…

“TOP 5 TIPS” FOR EACH STYLE Report out ▪ Listen to each perspective ▪

“TOP 5 TIPS” FOR EACH STYLE Report out ▪ Listen to each perspective ▪ Additions? ▪ Questions and discussion with full group ▪

PERSPECTIVE • The real payoff is in what you do with this information. Apply

PERSPECTIVE • The real payoff is in what you do with this information. Apply this to: • Observe • Categorize • Connect

DO YOU SEE OTHERS?

DO YOU SEE OTHERS?

CONTEXT AND ADAPTABILITY ▪ The goal is to connect ▪ Connect by style-flexing ▪

CONTEXT AND ADAPTABILITY ▪ The goal is to connect ▪ Connect by style-flexing ▪ Style-flex to be in-sync; not to manipulate ▪ Be conscious of strengthening a style

COMMUNICATION STYLE PLAN Goal: Reflect and apply ▪ Consider 2 -3 people you work

COMMUNICATION STYLE PLAN Goal: Reflect and apply ▪ Consider 2 -3 people you work with regularly ▪ Guess each person’s primary and backup styles ▪ How will you communicate with them differently? ▪

EXERCISE: THINK, PAIR, SHARE Think - Pair - Share around your communication style plan

EXERCISE: THINK, PAIR, SHARE Think - Pair - Share around your communication style plan ▪ Provide feedback and switch ▪ Apply the perspective of others to your interactions with your colleagues ▪

WHERE ARE WE NOW? Style is pervasive… • Understand your strengths and blind spots

WHERE ARE WE NOW? Style is pervasive… • Understand your strengths and blind spots • Develop skill so you can stretch to meet others •

YOUR ROLES MAY INCLUDE: ▪ ▪ ▪ Manager Technical lead Cross-functional team leader Peer

YOUR ROLES MAY INCLUDE: ▪ ▪ ▪ Manager Technical lead Cross-functional team leader Peer coach What else?

YOUR CHANNELS MAY INCLUDE: ▪ ▪ ▪ One-on-one conversations Team meetings Large group presentations

YOUR CHANNELS MAY INCLUDE: ▪ ▪ ▪ One-on-one conversations Team meetings Large group presentations to your division Email message to campus What else?

APPLY STYLES TO YOUR COMMUNICATION CHANNELS ▪ Message. What are my messages? ▪ ▪

APPLY STYLES TO YOUR COMMUNICATION CHANNELS ▪ Message. What are my messages? ▪ ▪ Which one is the most important? Audience. To whom am I talking? What keeps them up at night? ▪ Why do they care about my message? “WIIFM? ” ▪ ▪ Story. ▪ What will reach them--and bring them to my message?

REFLECT • Within 2 weeks… How will I begin? ▪ Who will I ask

REFLECT • Within 2 weeks… How will I begin? ▪ Who will I ask for support? ▪ The first thing I will do is: ▪ On what date will I review this? ▪

NEXT STEP: A GENTLE NUDGE 3 x 5 card ▪ Be specific ▪ Self-address

NEXT STEP: A GENTLE NUDGE 3 x 5 card ▪ Be specific ▪ Self-address an envelope ▪ Hand it in ▪

QUESTIONS?

QUESTIONS?