Higher Dramatic Commentary Revision Created by L Purvis

Dramatic Commentary • A Dramatic Commentary is basically your written direction and justification of an extract. • In the exam you will be asked to respond to an extract from your Set Text. • Each extract is approximately 2 pages in length and has no stage directions included. • You will need to mark the script at appropriate points for moves and other directorial actions – these may include notes for actors on movement, voice and technical effects which would enhance the presentation of the extract. • To help you to do this the Answer Book has pages divided into 3 columns which are headed: • "Moves and Interpretative Notes for Actors" • "Justification" • "Technical Effects" Created by L Purvis

Dramatic Commentary The allocation of marks for each column is as follows: • Moves etc. - 7 marks • Justification - 7 marks • Technical Effects - 2 marks • You must also draw a ground plan of the set relating to the extract. This should contain the following information: • • • A plan view of the set. An indication of exits and entrances for the actors. The starting positions of the actors at the commencement of the extract. The position of the audience in relation to the stage or acting area. A suitable key relating to the above. • The total for the Ground Plan is 4 marks. • The total for the Section B task is 20 marks. Created by L Purvis

Dramatic Commentary • The ‘moves’ column should include blocking using appropriate terminology e. g. up stage, stage left, crosses etc. • Where a candidate fails to do this a maximum of 4 marks should be awarded for this column. • Equally, where a candidate does not provide notes for voice or gesture or details of mood the maximum award for this column should be 4 marks. • For justification, you should offer reasons for movement, voice, mood, gesture etc. These reasons should fit the extract but should also show a wider knowledge of the text and how the actions in the extract relate to the plot and characterisation. • For technical effects, you should describe the lighting state at the start of the extract and provide one other technical effect for the extract. Both these effects should be justified. • Where a candidate suggests "lights up" at the beginning of the extract and "lights fade to blackout" at the end of the extract when it is part of a larger scene or act, they should receive a maximum of 1 mark for this column. • The candidates must finish the commentary. Created by L Purvis

Beginning your commentary: Moves and interpretive notes column • Number your script first, and then begin your directorial notes, that way you won’t have to rub things out if you don’t have enough points. • Your ‘Moves and interpretative notes’ should be numbered and then correspond to your justification for the move (in the justification column). • Take a new column for each page, it will help you to follow your directorial notes and make it easier to read. • As you answer you need to think in detail, think exactly what you would get the actors to do. Remember if you give a technical effect, you must highlight when this has to stop. • You must use voice, movement and blocking terminology. • Your first direction should always be the opening positions of the characters. • Your first justification should set the scene and establish your understanding of the mood and situation. • Make sure that your last moves note is at the very end of the extract, to show you have finished. SEE AN EXAMPLE OF A COMPLETED MOVES COLUMN ON THE NEXT SLIDE Created by L Purvis

Moves and interpretative notes for actors Justification 1) Mag and Joe are C. S on Ardnageeha (rostrum). Mag is sitting smoking, with a quizzical expression. Joe is sitting, surrounded by books, studying for his exams. 2) Mag speaks in a questioning tone, leaning in towards Joe rolls his eyes, pushes her off and sighs in annoyance at her disturbing him once again. He speaks to her in a stern tone. 3) Mag squeals in ‘pretend’ agony. Volume is deafening. She grabs her stomach and has a painful expression. Joe turns initially disinterested. Then he jumps to his feet and moves C. S. R. to C. S. L. He is pacing, eyes wide, anxious tone, loud volume. Created by L Purvis Technical effects

Beginning your commentary: Justifying your direction • In your justification, try to think along the lines of ‘what is this showing? ’ State how your directorial moves highlight themes of the play, the characters relationships and the situation they find themselves in. • What do your directorial moves tell us about the characters thoughts, feelings and attitudes? • Mention if your direction is used to highlight humour in the play. • Do not just repeat your directorial move, try to show a wider understanding of the play, plot and characters. • You need to have around 20 - 30 points. SEE AN EXAMPLE OF JUSTIFICATION ON THE NEXT SLIDE Created by L Purvis

Moves and interpretative notes for actors Justification 1) Mag and Joe are C. S on Ardnageeha (rostrum). Mag is sitting smoking, with a quizzical expression. Joe is sitting, surrounded by books, studying for his exams. 1) This opening position establishes the difference in the couple’s personalities. Mag is a dreamer, Joe is a pragmatist. The mood is relaxed at this point. 2) Mag speaks in a questioning tone, leaning in towards Joe rolls his eyes, pushes her off and sighs in annoyance at her disturbing once again. He speaks to her in a stern tone. 2) This further establishes the relationship between the characters. Mag is very talkative and finds it difficult to concentrate. She likes attention from Joe shows signs of frustration with Mag here as he lacks interest in her conversation. 3) Mag squeals in ‘pretend’ agony. Volume is deafening. She grabs her stomach and has a painful expression. Joe turns initially disinterested. He then jumps to his feet and moves C. S. R. to C. S. L. He is pacing, eyes wide, anxious tone, loud volume. 3) One of the play’s themes ‘Frustrated Love’ is conveyed here as Mag pretends to go into labour to get some attention from Joe. It conveys a very insecure side to Mag, but also shows the naivety of Joe in not quite understanding how to cope with the ‘fake labour’. They are two very scared individuals, essentially struggling to cope with this responsibility. Created by L Purvis Technical effects

Beginning your commentary: Technical effects column • Although only worth two marks, a lot of candidates lose these by not identifying the correct technical effects for the extract given. • Your technical effects should be given letters. These should also be marked clearly on the script and should correspond to your justification (in the justification column). • Remember the commentary is just an extract from the play, it can come from any point. Your technical effects have to show your understanding of where in the play the extract is. Created by L Purvis

Beginning your commentary: Technical effects column • If the extract is at the very start of the play then the technical effect would be: A) Lights up, Fresnel Lantern, amber gels, 75% intensity, C. S. A) Justification: It is the beginning of the play. It is also a warm summers day and the young couple are outside. The mood is relaxed and playful. If the extract is during the play, then the technical effect would be: A) Lighting state is amber gels on Fresnel Lanterns, 75% intensity, C. S. A) Justification: The couple are outside on the hill of Ardnageeha. It is a warm summers day and the mood is relaxed. • The Commentators will also have to be mentioned and justified in your first technical effect. You have to decide whether to only light them when they speak (which might not happen in your extract) or to have a constant dim 30% Profile Spotlight D. S. R AND D. S. L on them to highlight the symbolic juxtaposition of them in contrast to Mag and Joe. Created by L Purvis

Beginning your commentary: Technical effects column • Your final technical effect has to be marked on the script and again if it was the very end of the play, the technical effect would be: B) Lights fade to blackout. B) Justification: It is the end of the play. • If it was not the end of the play, then the technical effect should read: B) Lighting state remains the same. B) Justification: The play continues. SEE JUST ONE EXAMPLE OF COMPLETING A TECHNICAL EFFECT COLUMN ON THE NEXT SLIDE Created by L Purvis

Moves and interpretative notes for actors Justification Technical effects 1) Mag and Joe are C. S on Ardnageeha (rostrum). Mag is sitting smoking, with a quizzical expression. Joe is sitting, surrounded by books, studying for his exams. 1) This opening position establishes the difference between the couple. Mag is a dreamer, Joe is a pragmatist. The mood is relaxed at this point. A) Lighting state is at 75% intensity with amber gels on Fresnel Lanterns C. S. on Rostrum. Two Profile Spotlights are lit at 30% intensity D. S. R and D. S. L on Man and Woman’s seats. A) This is to show that it is a warm summers day and the couple are outside on the hill of Ardnageeha. The Commentators are lit at this low intensity to show there deliberate presence on stage. They are used to reflect the dramatic irony in the play and create a stark contrast and reminder of the fate of Mag and Joe. B) The play continues. Created by L Purvis B) Lighting state remains the same.

Beginning your commentary: Technical effects column • Technical effects will change depending on which extract from the play you are given. • ‘Winners’ is straightforward as you just need to identify correctly the lighting state and show an understanding of the setting of the play (as this does not change throughout this section). • ‘Losers’ is more complicated as the setting can change depending on the extract e. g. it could take place on the couch, in the backyard, in Mrs Wilson’s bedroom, even off stage (when Andy comes home drunk). Created by L Purvis

Beginning your commentary: Technical effects column • With ‘Losers’ you need to also consider whether to light Mrs Wilson at all times or just when the scenes take place in her room. • A low intensity Profile Spotlight on Mrs Wilson at all times, could symbolically represent her constant presence. • The mood is also different in ‘Losers’ so your technical effect if it was in the living room could be: A) Lighting state is at 60% intensity, Fresnel Lanterns, amber gels, C. S. There is also a 30% Profile spot U. S. C on Mrs Wilson. A) Justification: This is to show that the extract is set indoors. The Profile Spotlight on Mrs Wilson reflects her constant presence and status in the house. Created by L Purvis

Beginning your commentary: Technical effects column • The other technical effect element that you have to consider if the extract given is from ‘Losers’ is if there is a SFX of the bell. • This would just be added as another letter in your technical effects column: B) SFX of a loud, clanging bell. B) Justification: The bell is used by Mrs Wilson to summon Hanna. More symbolically it is her control over the couple and she uses this to stop them having time together. SEE AN EXAMPLE OF ADDING A LFX AND SFX INTO THE TECHNICAL EFFECTS COLUMN ON THE NEXT SLIDE Created by L Purvis

Moves and interpretative notes for actors 1) Andy and Hanna are C. S on the living room couch. They are cuddling and kissing. They are in a romantic relationship. Mrs Wilson is U. S. C on the rostrum. Justification 1) These opening positions reflect the mood in the house as a total contrast. Mrs Wilson is alone while Hanna and Andy are in love and courting. It appears a relaxed atmosphere at first. A) This is to show that they are indoors and it is a warm relaxed atmosphere in the living room. The Profile Spot is used to draw some attention to the presence of Mrs Wilson and her behaviour in response to the noise downstairs. 2)They speak in a quick pace and with mumbled clarity throughout, but with a loud volume. Mrs Wilson is creaking her neck, trying to listen to what is happening downstairs. She has a disgruntled expression, then a shocked expression as she hears silence. Andy and Hanna are overcome and stop speaking. A) C. S is lit at 60% intensity, with amber gels on Fresnel Lanterns. U. S. C is lit at 30% intensity using a Profile Spotlight. 2) This conveys the strict environment that the couple are in. They feel a sense of guilt at wanting to be ‘romantic’ together and have to speak throughout their embrace. This also conveys themes of ‘imposed divisions’ and ‘restrictive environment’ enforced by Mrs Wilson as she will stop at no lengths to avoid their relationship developing. B) The bell is used as a control mechanism by the bed ridden Mrs Wilson as she summons Hanna to her room. 3) Hanna jumps up, with rage in her expression. Her tone is furious as she moves U. S. C to her mother’s room. Technical effects 3) The theme of ‘Frustrated Love’ is conveyed here as Hanna demonstrates a true anger towards her mother for interrupting her time with Andy. Created by L Purvis B) SFX of a huge clanging bell.

Technical Effects Tasks • Draw a ‘Technical effects’ and ‘Justification’ column onto a piece of paper and work on correctly identifying the effects and justification for the moments from the play on the next slide. • Remember to look at the text carefully, considering any change to the setting which would effect your lighting. Also remember to look out for SFX in ‘Losers’. Created by L Purvis

Technical Effects Tasks ‘Winners’ 1) Starts: Pg. 13. ‘Woman: They stayed on top of Ardnageeha…’ Ends: Pg. 15. ‘Mag: What are you starting with? ’ 2) Starts: Pg. 32. ‘Woman: The months of June and July 1966 were the warmist …’ Ends: Pg. 34. ‘Joe: So sorry, Joseph, but my Phil’e’s not at ‘ome at present. ’ 3) Starts: Pg. 47. ‘Mag: The past’s over! And I hate this waiting time!’ Ends: Pg. 49. ‘Man: As if nothing ever happened. ’ Created by L Purvis

Technical Effects Tasks ‘Losers’ 1) Starts: Pg. 53. ‘Andy: By God, we were lively enough, too. ’ Ends: Pg. 55. ‘Hanna: We’re early at it the night! There’s the paper. Have a look at it. ’ 2) Starts: Pg. 64. ‘Hanna: Christ!’ Ends: Pg. 66. ‘Mrs Wilson: Thank you Andrew. As Father Peyton says: the family that prays together…’ 3) Starts: Pg. 71. ‘Mrs Wilson: I promise you, dear: he’s all right. I know he is. ’ Ends: Pg. 73 ‘Andy: (To statue) You and me – both sacked. ’ 4) Starts: Pg. 75. ‘Andy: I don’t think I told you about the tenant I have over in Riverview. ’ Ends: Pg. 77. ‘Andy: She could handle a regiment. ’ Created by L Purvis

Well Done! You have completed revision on Dramatic Commentaries! Now just keep revising and working on these to improve your technique. Created by L Purvis