Helping The Bullied Edward Turner RN MA Course
Helping The Bullied Edward Turner, RN, MA
Course Objectives § Define and examining bullying §Understanding and breaking the cycle of bullying §Causes of bullying §Affects of bullying §How to help children not bully, not be bystanders and to understand bullying
Bullying Repeated aggressive behavior intended to hurt another person, physically or mentally. Bullying exploits an imbalance of power.
Bullying Consists of 3 Basic Types of Abuse o. Emotional o. Verbal o. Physical
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Types of Bullying Verbal: Name calling, mocking, threats, and gossip. Physical: Hitting, pushing, spitting, throwing things. Social: Ignoring, isolating, excluding. Psychological: Stalking, taunting, harassing, intimidation. Cyber: Electronic devices, texts, emails, IM’s, social media, uploading and/or circulating offensive or lewd pictures.
Bullying Statistics o 28% of U. S. students in grades 6– 12 experienced bullying. o 20% of U. S. students in grades 9– 12 experienced bullying. o 9% of students in grades 6– 12 experienced cyberbullying. o 64 % of children who were bullied did not report it. o 57% of bullying situations stop when a peer intervenes on behalf of the student being bullied.
Bullying Statistics continued o. School-based bullying prevention programs decrease bullying by up to 25% o. Reasons for being bullied reported most often by students were looks (55%), body shape (37%), and race (16%) (Davis and Nixon, 2010) o. Approximately 30% of young people admit to bullying others in surveys. o 70. 6% of young people say they have seen bullying in their schools.
Bullying Statistics continued o 70. 4% of school staff have seen bullying. 62% witnessed bullying two or more times in the last month and 41% witness bullying once a week or more. o. When bystanders intervene, bullying stops within 10 seconds 57% of the time. o 15% of high school students (grades 9– 12) were electronically bullied in the past year. o. However, 55. 2% of LGBT students experienced cyberbullying.
Cycle of Bullying 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. Bullying Anxiety and Social Isolation Increased Vulnerability Bullying Increased Anxiety and Social Isolation Increased Vulnerability Bullying
Breaking the Bullying Cycle 1. Be Confident o Bullies target children that they think are weak and that won’t fight back 2. Do Not show the bully that your feelings are hurt. o Of course it hurts but if the bully doesn’t see that then they will get no satisfaction. 3. Try To Ignore a Bully o If you can’t ignore them agree. If you agree then the bully will not get any satisfaction.
Breaking the Bullying Cycle continued 4. It is NOT YOUR FAULT as no one deserves to be bullied 5. Make light and add humor to what the bully says 6. Change the subject and redirect the bully’s focus
Who Is At Risk? o. Those perceived as different from their peers, such as being overweight or underweight, wearing glasses or different clothing, being new to a school, LGBTQ or being unable to afford what kids consider “cool” o. Are perceived as weak or unable to defend themselves o. Are depressed, anxious, or have low self esteem
Who Is At Risk? continued o. Are less popular than others and have few friends o. Do not get along well with others, seen as annoying or provoking, or antagonize others for attention However, even if a child has these risk factors, it doesn’t mean that they will be bullied.
Who Is Likely To Be A Bully? There are two types of kids who are more likely to bully others: o. Some are well-connected to their peers, have social power, are overly concerned about their popularity, and like to dominate or be in charge of others. o. Others are more isolated from their peers and may be depressed or anxious, have low self esteem, be less involved in school, be easily pressured by peers, or not identify with the emotions or feelings of others.
These Children May Also Bully o. Are aggressive or easily o. Have difficulty following frustrated rules o. Have less parental o. View violence in a positive involvement or having issues way at home o. Have friends who bully others o. Think badly of others
§Remember, those who bully others do not need to be stronger or bigger than those they bully. §The power imbalance can come from a number of sources —popularity, strength, cognitive ability—and children who bully may have more than one of these characteristics.
Internal Causes of Bullying o. Insecurity o. Fear o. Feeling threatened o. Want to show off or feel powerful or popular o. Jealousy o. Escapism
External Causes of Bullying o. A family environment of either neglect or physical abuse. o. A school or institution's lack of standards around interpersonal treatment. o. Positive reinforcement around "acting out" in the form of added attention. o. Our culture's glorification with winning, power, and violence. o. A history of the perpetrator him or herself having experienced rejection, failure, or bullying.
How Are Bullied Children Affected o. Stress o. Poor grades o. Anger o. Skipping school o. Depression o. Sleep disturbances o. Withdrawal o. Somatic problems o. Isolation
Kids who are bullied can experience negative physical, school, and mental health issues.
Kids who are bullied are more likely to experience: o. Depression and anxiety, increased feelings of sadness and loneliness, changes in sleep and eating patterns, and loss of interest in activities they used to enjoy. These issues may persist into adulthood. o. Health complaints, real or imagined. o. Decreased academic achievement—GPA and standardized test scores—and school participation. They are more likely to miss, skip, or drop out of school.
A very small number of bullied children might retaliate through extremely violent measures. In 12 of 15 school shooting cases in the 1990 s, the shooters had a history of being bullied
Although children who are bullied are at risk of suicide, bullying alone is not the cause. Many issues contribute to suicide risk, including depression, problems at home, and trauma history. Additionally, specific groups have an increased risk of suicide, including American Indian and Alaskan Native, Asian American, lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender youth. This risk can be increased further when these kids are not supported by parents, peers, and schools. Bullying can make an unsupportive situation worse.
Those Who Bully Are Likely To: o. Abuse alcohol and other drugs in adolescence and as adults o. Get into fights, vandalize property, and drop out of school o. Engage in early sexual activity o. Have criminal convictions and traffic citations as adults o. Be abusive toward their romantic partners, spouses, or children as adults
Bystanders Kids who witness bullying are more likely to: §Have increased use of tobacco, alcohol, or other drugs §Have increased mental health problems, including depression and anxiety §Miss or skip school
Don’t Be a Bystander o. Don’t give bullying an audience o. Set a good example o. Help them get away o. Tell a trusted adult o. Be their friend
When Adults Intervene Change Happens o. Stop bullying on the spot. o. Stand up for children that are being bullied. o. Take a pro-active stance against bullying. o. Start an anti-bullying campaign in your child’s school. o. Start an anti-bullying campaign at a community center or youth group. “Justice will not be served until those who are unaffected are as outraged as those who are. ” - Benjamin Franklin
Can Bullying Be Considered Trauma? What is Traumatic? Types of Trauma o. Acute o. Chronic o. Complex
Trauma and PTSD o Reliving the event (re-experiencing) o. Nightmares o. Flashbacks o. Triggers (Trauma Reminders) o. Avoidance of situations/people that remind you of the trauma o. Hyper-arousal (easy or exaggerated startle reactions) o. Negativity
Help Your Children Understand Bullying Children who know what bullying is can better identify it. They can talk about bullying if it happens to them or others. Kids need to know ways to safely stand up to bullying and how to get help.
Help Your Children Understand Bullying continued o. Encourage children to speak to a trusted adult if they are bullied or see others being bullied. The adult can give comfort, support, and advice, even if they can’t solve the problem directly. Encourage the child to report bullying if it happens. o. Talk about how to stand up to bullies. Give tips, like using humor and saying “stop” directly and confidently. Talk about what to do if those actions don’t work, like walking away
Help Your Children Understand Bullying continued o. Talk about strategies for staying safe, such as staying near adults or groups of other children. o. Urge them to help bullied children by showing kindness or getting help.
Talk To Your Children Research tells us that children really do look to parents and caregivers for advice and help on tough decisions. Sometimes spending 15 minutes a day talking can reassure a child that they can talk to their parents if they have a problem.
Talk To Your Children About Bullies o. Refuse to be an audience for a bully o. Do not “follow the crowd” o. Do not laugh while someone is being picked on o. Do not participate in gossip o. Do not use the internet to hurt someone o. Walk away and go get help o. Know your personal strength
Start conversations about daily life and feelings with questions like these: o. What was one good thing that happened today? Any bad things? o. What is lunch time like at your school? Who do you sit with? What do you talk about? o. What is it like to ride the school bus? o. What are you good at? o. What do you like best about yourself ?
Talking about bullying directly is an important step in understanding how the issue might be affecting our children. There are no right or wrong answers to these questions, but it is important to encourage children to answer them honestly. Assure your child that they are not alone in addressing any problems that arise.
Start conversations about bullying with questions like these: o. What does “bullying” mean to you? o. Describe what kids who bully are like. Why do you think people bully? o. Who are the adults you trust most when it comes to things like bullying?
Start conversations about bullying with questions like these: continued o. What do you think parents can do to help stop bullying? o. Have you or your friends left other kiddos out on purpose? Do you think that was bullying? Why or why not? o. What do you usually do when you see bullying going on?
Start conversations about bullying with questions like these: continued o. Do you ever see other children at your school being bullied by others? How does that make you feel? o. Have you ever tried to help someone who is being bullied? What happened ? What would you do if it happens again? o. Have you ever felt scared to go to school because you were afraid of bullying? What ways have you tried to change it?
Stay Up To Date On The Lives Of Your Children o. Read class newsletters and school flyers. Talk about them at home. o. Check the school website o. Go to school events o. Greet and know the bus driver o. Meet teachers and counselors at “Back to School” night or reach out by email o. Share phone numbers with other children’s parents
Model How To Treat Others Children learn from adults’ actions. By treating others with kindness and respect, adults show the children in their lives that there is no place for bullying. Even if it seems like they are not paying attention, they are watching how adults manage stress and conflict, as well as how they treat their friends, colleagues, and families.
Encourage Your Children o. Help Children take part in activities, interests, and hobbies they like. o. Children can volunteer, play sports, sing in a chorus, or join a youth group or school club. These activities give our children a chance to have fun and meet others with the same interests. They can build confidence and friendships that help protect children from bullying. o. It also gives foster children a sense of normalcy.
If You Witness Bullying o. Intervene immediately. It is ok to get another adult to help. o. Separate the children involved. o. Make sure everyone is safe. o. Meet any immediate medical or mental health needs. o. Stay calm. Reassure the children involved, including bystanders. o. Model respectful behavior when you intervene.
Avoid Common Mistakes o. Don’t ignore it. Don’t think that children can work it out without adult help. o. Don’t immediately try to sort out the facts. o. Don’t force other children to say publicly what they saw. o. Don’t question the children involved in front of other kids. o. Don’t talk to the children involved together, only separately. o. Don’t make the children involved apologize or patch up relations on the spot.
Call Police or Get Medical Attention Immediately If: A weapon is involved. There are threats of serious physical injury. There are threats of hate-motivated violence, such as racism or homophobia. There is serious bodily harm. There is sexual abuse. Anyone is accused of an illegal act, such as robbery or extortion —using force to get money, property, or services.
References ohttps: //www. google. com/search? site=&tbm=isch&source=hp&biw=1366&bih=657&q=bullying+definition &oq=bullying+def&gs_l=img. 1. 0. 0 l 4 j 0 i 30 k 1 j 0 i 5 i 30 k 1 l 4 j 0 i 5 i 10 i 30 k 1. 34301. 34814. 2. 38880. 3. 3. 0. 0. 103. 29 4. 1 j 2. 3. 0. . . 1 ac. 1. 64. img. . 0. 3. 290. Gml 0 I 9 g-o. OQ#imgrc=JGhd 3 MAH 7 Yh. VOM%3 A ohttps: //www. stopbullying. gov/news/media/facts/#listing o“The Bullying Workbook for Teens” by Raychelle Cassada Lohman and Julia V. Taylor, New Harbinger Publications, 2013 o“Bullying Statistics and Information, ” American Society for the Positive Care of Children, americanspcc. org ohttp: //www. slideshare. net/georgiavoices/henrich-bullying-presentation-10 -13 ohttp: //www. ptsd. va. gov/public/PTSD-overview/basics/symptoms_of_ptsd. asp ohttps: //www. stopbullying. gov/
Questions/Comments Edward Turner, RN, MA Louisiana Child Welfare Training Academy (985) 549 -2497 James. turner-2@selu. edu
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