Healthy Relationships Family Friends and Dating Healthy Relationships

Healthy Relationships Family, Friends and Dating

Healthy Relationships • Relationships: is a bond or connection you have with other people. • Healthy relationships are based on shared values and interests and mutual respect. • Family: involve both immediate family and extended family, and last your entire life. • Friendship: is a significant relationship between two people that is based on caring, trust, and consideration. • Good friends share similar values, and can positively influence your self-concept and behavior and help you resist negative influences. • When choosing friends you should ask yourself these questions: • Does this person have the qualities I admire most? • Is this someone I can trust with my thoughts and confidences? • How does this person affect my health? • What interests and values do we have in common? • What can I offer in this friendship? What can they offer me?

Building Healthy Relationships (H. R. ) • For a relationship to succeed the people involved need certain skills. • Communication: your way of sending and receiving messages. Can be exchanged in words, though gestures, facial expressions and behaviors. It also lets you discover the feelings, needs, wants and knowledge of others. • Cooperation: working together for the good of all. • Compromise: is a problem solving method that involves ea. Person giving up something to reach a solution that satisfies everyone. Characteristics of H. R. • Mutual Respect and Consideration: accepting one another’s tastes and opinions and being tolerant of different view points. • Honesty: having the confidence to be open and honest about their actions, thoughts, and feelings. • Dependability: knowing each is there for the other when needed. • Commitment: wiling to work together and make sacrifices that benefit everyone involved. Being loyal to ea. other and being committed to strengthening the relationship.

• Character: is the way you think, feel and act. Your values are the beliefs and ideals that guide the way you live your life. • 6 traits of good character: • Trustworthiness * Respect • Responsibility * Fairness • Caring *Citizenship Lesson 2 Communication Effectively • All the ways you send and receive messages are forms of communication • 3 basic skills are needed for E. C. speaking, listening, and body language. • Communication Styles: • Passive: the inability or unwillingness to express thoughts and feelings. They do not stand up for themselves or defend their attitudes or beliefs • Aggressive: often try to get their way through bullying and intimidation. They don’t consider the rights of others, they attack the person not the problem in and argument. • Assertive: expressing thoughts and feelings clearly and directly but without hurting others. They defend their attitudes and beliefs, but respect the rights of others.

Ch. 11 Family Relationships The Role of the Family: • Family is the basic unit of society it provides a safe and nurturing environment for it’s members. Importance of Family; • Physical Needs: provide basic physical needs, food, clothing, and shelter. • Adult members also making sure that children get medical and dental checkups, immunizations and learn how to make healthy choices. • Mental/Emotional: provide a safe, comforting environment in which everyone can express thoughts and emotions freely. • By providing emotional support and unconditional love, families promote positive self concepts in their members. • Social: Children learn how to communicate and get along with others. • Play a major role in children’s social growth by developing their

• Developing a good value system helps you in making responsible decisions, they also determine your character. • Sharing culture and Traditions: adult family members pass their culture and history onto their children • It enriches the lives of family members and helps people develop a sense of pride in who they are. Strengthening Family Relationships: • Demonstrate care and love: • Show support, especially during hard times. • Demonstrate trust • Express Commitment • Be responsible • Spend time together • Work together to solve problems • Be sensitive to others needs.

Lesson 2 Change and the Family • 2 main types of changes in families that cause stress • Changes in the structure or makeup of the family • Changes in the family circumstances Structure changes: when someone new joins the family or when a member of the family moves out of the home. • Separation and Divorce • Custody: the legal decision about who has the right to make decisions affecting the children and who is physically going to take care of them. • Adjustments: adapting to divorce requires emotional adjustments for the whole family. • How to manage emotional stress • Remind yourself that you did not cause the problem • Do not feel that you have to choose sides • Communicate your feelings about the divorce with your parents or a trusted adult.

• Make sure to be eating healthy, getting physical activity and managing stress. • Consider joining a support group for children of divorce • Remarriage: adjusting to new step-parents and children • Death in the family: Families need time grieve for a lost loved one and there is no set time for that. Circumstance Changes: • Moving: members may miss their old friends and familiar surroundings • Financial Problems: loss of a job, medical emergencies, overdue bills. Credit card abuse. These are serious problems that can lead to arguments about money. • Illness and Disability: 1 or more members may need to change their schedules to care for the sick or disabled. Also having to make major medical decisions

Circumstance Changes: • Drug and Alcohol Abuse: threatens the health of the entire family. Without intervention and outside help, the problem can cause the family system to break down. • Coping with family changes: • Strategies for managing family stress • Do what you can to help • Read books about the subject or talk to people who faced a similar problem • Use stress-management techniques • When problems occur, family members must identify the problem, evaluate how the problem is affecting the entire family, discuss what can be done to handle it, and draw upon family unity and strength to resolve the problem together. • Dealing with Family Crises • Sometimes negative and even dangerous situations may develop in families undergoing conflict and stress

Family Violence: • Violence can be emotional , physical, and sexual in nature • Domestic Violence is any act of violence involving family members, it is criminal act that can be prosecuted by law • Abuse includes any mistreatment of one person by another. The main forms of abuse in the home include the following: • Emotional Abuse: a pattern of behavior that attacks the emotional development and sense of worth of an individual • Physical: is the intentional infliction of bodily harm or injury on another person. • Sexual: is any sexual contact that is forced upon a person against his/her will. This includes making unwelcome comments of a sexual nature to another person as well as actually touching the person in an unwelcome sexual way.

• Spousal abuse: violence directed at a spouse. It may occur in all kinds of families regardless of education level, income or ethnicity. • It is critical for victims of spousal abuse and their children to leave the dangerous situation and seek help. • Child abuse: abuse directed at a child. May include neglect which is a failure to provide for a child’s physical and emotional needs. • A child who lives in an abusive home may try to escape by running away. Runaways often become victims of exploitation because they do not have the money, job skills, or means to support themselves. The best solution for children suffering abuse is to ask for help from a trusted adult. Effects of Abuse: may include but not limited to: An inability to trust or establish healthy personal relationships Chronic physical pain Neglect of or injury to ones self, including suicide attempts Depression, anxiety, sleep disorders, and eating disorders Abuse of alcohol and other drugs.

Breaking the cycle of Violence: • A child who suffers or who witnesses abuse may view violence in the home as a normal way of life. As a result, the child may be more likely to become an adult who abuses others. • This pattern of repeating violent or abusive behaviors from one generation to the next is called the cycle of violence. the only way to break it is to stop all forms of violence and abuse. Avoiding Domestic Violence: • There are several strategies that can help you avoid and prevent domestic violence. the 3 R’s • Recognize: become aware of acts that are abusive. Remember that abuse takes many forms • Resist: if anyone tries to harm you physically or abuse you in a sexual way, resist in any way you can. Be assertive and stand up for yourself. Run away from the abuser, and seek help from a trusted adult. • Report: if someone treats you in an abusive manner, get away and tell someone about the incident as soon as you can. If you witness someone else being abused, report the abuse to the authorities or tell an adult who can help you.

• Being a child victim or witness of abuse does not justify becoming an abusive adult. All forms of domestic abuse are unacceptable and most of these acts are illegal. • Sources to seek help from • Community services * family counseling • Police * Mediation • Faith communities * shelters • Substance abuse treatment facilities * Teachers/school staff • Support groups

Ch. 12 Friendships and Dating Relationships • Peers are people of similar age who share similar interest. • Your relationships with friends and peers not only contribute to your identity but can also affect your health and well-being. Types of Peer Relationships • Friendship is a significant relationship between two people. • Healthy friendships are based on caring, respect, trust and consideration. • They can give you a sense of belonging and help you define and reinforce your values. • Platonic Friendships are a friendship with a member of the opposite gender in which there is affection but they two people are not considered a couple. • Such relationships can be valuable source of advice concerning dating issues. • They help you realize that all people, regardless of gender, have similar feelings, needs, and concerns. • Casual friendships: a relationship between peers who share something in common. • You may form a casual friendship with a classmate, teammate, or someone who you attend church with. • They are usually people with whom you share similar interests but are not necessarily people with whom you form deep emotional bonds.

• Close friends: people you have a strong emotional bond with and feel comfortable sharing their thoughts, experiences and feelings. • When problems arise in the relationship they try and work them out together. • True friends have several common attributes: • Similar values, interests, beliefs and attitudes on basic issues. • Open and honest communication • Sharing of joys, disappointments, dreams, and concerns • Mutual respect, caring and support • Concern about each other’s safety and well-being Cliques • A small circle of friends, usually with similar backgrounds or tastes, who exclude people viewed as outsiders • Positive side: may provide members with a sense of belonging • Negative side: members are discouraged from thinking or acting as individuals • Cliques tend to be prejudice or stereotype people they view as outsiders. • Prejudice is making assumptions or judgments about an individual without really knowing him or her. • Stereotype is an exaggerated and oversimplified belief about an entire group of people, such as an ethnic or religious group or a gender.

• Building and strengthening friendships: • Be loyal: friends can trust and depend on each other. They don’t purposely do anything to hurt each other and they always speak respectfully of each other. • Encourage each other: a good friend is supportive and makes you feel good about yourself. Acknowledge each other’s accomplishments and help each other through difficult times. • Respect each other: common courtesy, avoid taking them for granted, be on time, keep promises • Peer Pressure • The influence that people your age may have on you • Can be positive or negative depending on the influences on your actions and behaviors. • Positive: • Role Model by inspiring peers to take part in a positive act or a worthwhile cause. • Negative: • Harassment: persistently annoying others. May include name-calling, teasing, or bullying. • Manipulation: an indirect, dishonest way to control or influence others. • Example: using guilt trips to get desired results, using flattery or praise to get what you want, making threats, promising violence if the person does not do what they were asked

Resisting peer pressure • Develop friendships with people who share your values and interests. Friends who have respect for your health and well-being will be less likely to pressure you into doing something that goes against your values. • Assertive refusal: standing up for your rights in a firm but positive way. • Refusal skills are communication strategies that can help you say no when you are urged to take part in behaviors that are unsafe, unhealthy or that go against your values. Dating and setting limits • Dating provides opportunities to develop social skills, such as communicating and interacting with a person of the opposite gender. • Infatuation: exaggerated feelings of passion for another person. • Affection: feelings of fondness for someone this comes when you know another person well. • Friendship and caring are essential for building an affectionate, close relationship with a dating partner. • Love is strong affection for another arising out of personal ties or attraction based on sexual desire, affection and tenderness.

Setting Limits • Setting limits are intended to protect your health and safety • Limits on the age of the person you date as well as places you will go, how you will get there and what you will do. • Setting such limits and making them clear before a date helps you avoid potentially risky situations • When you communicate your limits on sexual activity, you need to be clear and firm about your decision to practice abstinence. Avoid risky situations • Some dating situations may increase the chance of being pressured to participate in sexual activity or some other high risk behaviors. • Before you go on a date, know where you’re going, what you will be doing, who else will be there and what time you are expected home. • Avoid going to places where alcohol and other drugs are present • Avoid being alone with a date at home or in an isolated place.