Habit 5 Seek First to Understand Then Be

Habit #5 – Seek First to Understand, Then Be Understood (Part 2)

Poor Listening Styles (Review) • Spacing out • Pretend Listening • Selective Listening • Word Listening • Self-Centered Listening • Judging • Advising • Probing

Genuine Listening

Step #1 of Genuine Listening • Listen with your eyes, heart, and ears - 93% of what is said, is not voiced - listen to what is not said

Notice the Tone I didn’t say you had an attitude problem.

Step #2 of Genuine Listening • Stand in their shoes - See the situation from their perspective

Step #3 of Genuine Listening • Practice Mirroring - repeat the meaning of what was said using your own words - don’t just focus on the words that were said Statement: “I don’t have any friends. Everyone hates me. ” Mirroring: “It must be tough moving to a new school. ”

Mirroring Phrases • “So, what you’re saying is…” • “You feel that…” • “I can see that you’re feeling…” “So, what you’re saying is…”

Mirroring (Just for Fun)

Activity Cards

Silent Reading • Read about genuine listening on pages 171 -179 in the book entitled The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Teens by Sean Covey.

Active Listening Practice • Choose a topic from the bottom of the “Active Listening Checklist” • Be prepared to speak for 3 minutes. • Observe group members and record active listening behaviors

Active Listening Checklist