Get a Grip on Anger Dont Pop Your

+ Get a Grip on Anger Don’t Pop Your Balloon!

Anger (also known as wrath or rage) is an intense emotional state involving a strong uncomfortable and hostile response to a perceived provocation, hurt or threat. It is a strong feeling of displeasure aroused by a real or supposed wrong.

Anger (also known as wrath or rage) in Greek orge [ojrghv] and thumos [qumov"] are used more or less interchangeably. Meaning a more settled and long-lasting attitude of anger; often including revenge Mentioned ~ 455 times in the Bible from Gen 4: 5 to Rev 19: 15

Do I get angry sometimes? Why? In what situations? Did my anger ever fix the problem? Did I ever hurt someone else because of my anger ? How did it feel afterward?

People react in different ways when they feel angry: • Some people express their anger. • Some people give the cold shoulder, and silent treatment but claim forgiveness. • Some people hide their anger from others and even from themselves. Hidden anger can create anxiety and stress.

How do you look and sound when you get angry? Do you… • • • Get red faced Clam up Pout and sulk Raise your voice Throw things Hit something or someone Clench fists Feel sad Other

Anger begins with negative thoughts which trigger physical changes in your body such as: • Increased heart rate • Elevated blood pressure • Increased levels of adrenaline & noradrenaline • Tense muscles • Rapid breathing • Increased sweating • Increased blood flow

Let’s Play Angry Balloons

Your sibling is annoying you and won’t stop Your parents make you late for school and you get a late note You didn’t get invited to a friend’s party Parents decided you’ll spend all summer doing school work You catch your sibling reading your diary Your fav dish is done when it is your turn to make a plate at a friend’s house Your mom makes broccoli for dinner again. You hate broccoli Your parents make you go to bed early even though you are not tired Your friend shares an embarras sing story of you at lunch You’re trying to tell a story but your friend keeps cutting you off to tell the story

You are falsely accused of cheating on a test You’re tired but your parents make you go to school anyway You want to watch your favorite show but mom says you have to do your HW first Your parents wake you up early for church on Sunday Your friend cheats and wins a game you’re playing Your parents won’t let you go to your friend’s house unless you clean your whole room You fall at school and everyone laughs Your mom makes you clean up a mess you didn’t make

Let’s pretend that this balloon is a person, and the air blown into the balloon is the person’s angry feelings. What will eventually happen if we keep on blowing more and more air into a balloon without ever letting any air out?

Yes, it will pop! When a balloon breaks it isn’t fun to play with anymore.

If a person fills up with anger and negative thoughts, he or she may “pop” by… • Hurting someone • Hurting something Would that person be fun to be around?

Some inappropriate ways to express anger are: • Hitting others • Damaging property • Saying hurtful things • Hurting yourself

Keeping anger inside may result in harmful behaviors such as… • Frightening dreams • Sleep problems • Grinding teeth or clenching jaws while sleeping • Feeling down or depressed • Stomach ulcers/other illness • Nervous feelings and behaviors • Procrastination or habitual lateness

Does your anger ever cause problems for you? How? Let’s look at some ways to help.

GET TO THE ROOTS • One primary root of anger: The Family. Angry people come from angry families because they learn from their role models and repeat the same behavior. • Injustice & unfair treatment • Strife: hidden & repressed anger – begins with judging others, gossiping, backbiting, thinking too highly of yourself. – often exhibited in arguing, bickering, heated disagreements, and angry undercurrents. • Impatience: when we can’t get what we want when we want it, or when others slow us down and hinder our progress.

GET TO THE ROOTS • Abuse of any kind: sexual, physical, verbal, emotional, or mental – All of these are injustices that eventually leave the abused feeling helpless and angry. Abuse cannot be ignored. • Unmet needs • Jealousy: – One of the first negative emotions mentioned in the Bible (Genesis 4: Cain killed his brother Abel because he was jealous to the point of being angry) – Extreme, but a good reminder of how dangerous jealousy can be • Fear of being controlled by others

What does the Holy Bible say about Anger?

Someone in the Bible who didn’t control their anger…? Ø Cain

What’s wrong with Anger? “A quick-tempered man acts foolishly” (Proverbs 14: 17) gets angry easily

WHAT DO YOU THINK ANGER CAN LEAD TO? SIN

#2 “for the wrath of man does not produce the righteousness of God. ” (James 1: 20)

Do we notice that the more we get angry, THE MORE THE OTHER PERSON GETS ANGRY? #3 “An angry man stirs up strife, And a furious man abounds in transgression. ” (Proverbs 29: 22)

• Is Anger a SIN? – No and Yes. – Just being tempted to do something is not sin—it’s when you don’t resist the temptation. . And you entertain an evil thought and allow it to become an idea, then the idea becomes an action. This is SIN. – We must guard against allowing anger to drag us into sin. • “Be angry, and do not sin, do not let the sun go down on your wrath, nor give place to the devil. ” Ephesians 4: 26, 27 • “Do not hasten in your spirit to be angry, For anger rests in the bosom of fools. ” Ecclesiastes 7: 9 • “Vengeance is Mine, I will repay, says the Lord. ” Romans 12: 19

control #4 “let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath; ” (James 1: 19) #5 “The heart of the righteous studies how to answer, But the mouth of the wicked pours forth evil. ” (Proverbs 15: 28) “Resist the devil and he will flee from you. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. ” (James 4: 7 -8) #6

WHAT TO DO? • Virtue of Self-Control: 1 Peter 5: 8, 9 … Romans 12: 21 • Do not Keep anger locked inside and pretend it doesn’t exist • Acknowledge and confess your angry feelings, so you can start to process them and deal with them. • Choose your pain!!! BITTER OR BETTER? – Choice 1: live with anger and bitterness – Choice 2: Positively process angry and bitter feelings • When Satan makes you angry, remember that he’s trying to keep you from accomplishing the will of God in your life. • Ask God for help and support and grace. Ask for the Holy Spirit to give you the power to walk in stability and to bear fruits of the Spirit. • God can give you the power to forgive others, and to love even your enemies.

TAKE STEPS TOWARDS FREEDOM • St. Paul advised his disciple Timothy saying, “be watchful in all things, endure afflictions, do the work of an evangelist, fulfill your ministry” (2 Timothy 4: 5). • Must Deal with the Sin of Temper (uncontrolled anger): When we get angry, we shouldn’t allow that anger to take over our emotions or actions or WORDS. • We should train ourselves and try to calm down first, then we are able to start doing what God has called us to do.

Other Things to Do to Get a Grip on …

• • • Punch, poke or twist Play Doh ®or clay Pound a pillow Scribble a picture Finger paint an angry picture Pop balloons or packing bubbles Work it out—clean your room, . . etc. Take deep breaths, count to 10 Talk to someone Do not text, call, or make decisions while you’re angry more

• Write in a journal • Jump rope, exercise, get moving • Blow bubbles • Dream about favorite things • “Time out” yourself

What will you do with your anger? Suppress or Express or Confess?

Which idea/s will you try? • Write or draw about the idea you will try the next time you get angry. • Share your plan with someone. • Ask for help if you need it.

When you “get a grip” on anger, you’ll like yourself better and others will like you better too.

The End