FRIENDSHIP THEREFORE ENCOURAGE ONE ANOTHER AND BUILD ONE

FRIENDSHIP THEREFORE ENCOURAGE ONE ANOTHER AND BUILD ONE ANOTHER UP, JUST AS YOU ARE DOING. I THESS. 5: 11 (ESV)

FRIENDSHIP • Nearly everyone appreciates having good friends because we know the joy and enrichment they add to our lives.

FRIENDSHIP • How do we build and improve our friendships?

FRIENDSHIP • Muhammad Ali said, “Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain. It’s not something you learn in school. But if you haven’t learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven’t learned anything. ” • God’s Word is one of the best places to learn about friendship.

FRIENDSHIP • What are some things the bible says about friendship

FRIENDSHIP • The Bible says that Abraham was called “the friend of God” (James 2: 23 ) • “the LORD spoke to Moses face to face, as a man speaks to his friend” (Exodus 33: 11 ). • Solomon wrote that there is a friend who “sticks closer than a brother” (Proverbs 18: 24 ). We certainly need to have friends like this, and we also need to be this kind of friend for others.

FRIENDSHIP • God obviously understands the value and importance of friendship in our lives. • And, amazingly, even though He is and always will be the supreme God of the universe, He offers to have this kind of relationship with us!

FRIENDSHIP • What are some principles you can use to heal our relationships with family and/or friends?

FRIENDSHIP • We know that not all friendships last and not all are as genuine as we once may have thought. • King David experienced the pain of betrayal by a friend (Psalm 41: 9 ), as did our Savior when He was betrayed by Judas (John 13: 18 ).

FRIENDSHIP Evaluate Who You Are. • When you see yourself as valuable enough to deserve love and attention from the other person, you form a boundary that you will not compromise. • A little self-esteem goes a long way in garnering the courage to ask and answer questions that reveal who you really are and what you really want. • Once you look realistically at who you really are and what you desire in a healthy relationship, you are ready to enter into the research that will lead to sound decisions. Forgive quickly.

FRIENDSHIP • The Caretaker. Are the ones who remember the little things about you, who check in on you and are the first ones to volunteer a helping hand. These sorts of friends are selfless givers who work towards the happiness of others. • The Couple. Their presence teaches how a caring relationship handles both the good times and the bad in a way that is still respectful to both parties. • The Adventurer. Having someone in our lives who are good at motivating us to go in the right direction. • The Planner. Is guaranteed to stick around and help you hold things together. • The Honest Friend. Someone who will be honest with you in a loving and constructive way.

FRIENDSHIP • The state of human relationships today is generally poor. No matter the level—whether head of state to head of state, nation to nation or person to person—there are many examples of strained and broken relationships. • There all sort of symptoms of our damaged world. • At home, in the intimate personal relationships found in marriage, family relationships, many struggle to get along.

FRIENDSHIPS • There are times when ending a friendship may be the appropriate course of action. • Insensitive Person-Don’t feel compassion of care for anyone but themselves. It’s all about them. • Self-Pity Person-Always take the role for the victim. Can disturb your peace. • Talkative Person-Talks about everything and everyone. Be sure they will talk about you too. They don’t respect or treasure what you share and consider precious. • Needy Person-Around you only when they need something. They are not around if they don’t. • Naysayers- Never have anything good to say. Nothing is ever good enough. • Haters- Not happy about anyone’s accomplishments.

FRIENDSHIP • Since we humans have had plenty of experience with bad relationships, it is actually quite easy to document and even predict the progressive steps that generally occur as relationships go bad. • At the earliest stages of conflict, little disagreements are glossed over or ignored. Eventually something happens that evokes anger and frustration, which moves the relationship into the conflict stage. • As the conflict progresses, both parties experience hostile feelings and negative communication from the other. • At this stage, many share their side of the disagreement with others and look for consolation from them.

FRIENDSHIP The Process of Conflict • 1. The Latent Stage: Negative feelings are not brought out in the open and discussed, and frustration and dissatisfaction increase. • 2. The Trigger Stage: The triggering event is often small and seemingly unrelated to the outpouring of anger and frustration that come out. • 3. The Clash Stage: Pent-up frustrations and irritations pour out. This is often a surprise to the other partner who didn’t realize the depth of the feelings. This clash can lead to resolution, avoidance or simply continuing in a state of conflict. • 4. The Increase-of-Conflict Stage: The conflict begins to spread to other areas of life. Hostile criticisms and disparaging remarks cause anger and bitterness to grow. Each person feels rejected and threatened. There is less willingness to accept blame and more willingness to blame the other person. In some cases, one partner will try to make himself or herself feel more adequate by tearing down the other.

FRIENDSHIP Keys To Better Relationships: • Key No. 1: Don’t raise your voice. The Bible says that a “soft answer turns away wrath” (Proverbs 15: 1). • When discussions turn into yelling matches, people’s opinions are not changed. Instead, they are hardened and people feel justified in their own position because of the other person’s behavior.

FRIENDSHIP • Key No. 2: Always tell the truth. Although it has become common for people to routinely lie, if your friend realizes that you don’t always speak the truth, he or she will never know whether to believe what you say. Relationships are built on trust; and when one party lies, trust is undermined. • Paul told the Ephesians to put “away lying, ‘Let each one of you speak truth with his neighbor’” (Ephesians 4: 25).

FRIENDSHIP • Key No. 4: Strive to be a gentle, peaceful person. While some people mistakenly believe such attributes are signs of weakness, they are actually keys to better relationships and reflections of godliness. • Paul admonishes us: “If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men” (Romans 12: 18). • James states: “The wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, willing to yield, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality and without hypocrisy” (James 3: 17).

FRIENDSHIP • Key No. 3: Always show respect. While we may not appreciate or agree with someone’s opinions or actions, we need to show respect to the person. • We may not understand all that went into the decision, or the person may have simply made a mistake. As Paul wrote, “Speak evil of no one” (Titus 3: 2).

FRIENDSHIP • Consider how pleasant it would be to have a friend who fully displayed the fruit of love as the apostle Paul described it: • “Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails” (1 Corinthians 13: 4 -8). • Growing in that kind of love leads to the kind of healthy, beautiful relationships that God wants us to have!

• Next Week TBA

Reference Relationships: Life. Hope and truth. com

How to Make Our Friendships Grow