FRIENDSHIP IN THE BOOK OF PROVERBS Proverbs 18

FRIENDSHIP IN THE BOOK OF PROVERBS Proverbs 18: 24 - A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. August 31, 2014

Friendship 1. What is a friend? 2. What are the qualities you seek and admire in a 3. 4. 5. 6. friendship? Does proximity and friendship go together? Can good friends disagree and quarrel and still remain friends? In a true friendship, is it what I can get, what I can give, or both? As a Christian, can your deepest friends only be with Christians?

• Proverbs is “gospel wisdom for complicated lives” Let’s begin here: • God is your friend through Christ. • Friendship began with God • All we know of friendship begins with God himself • The heart of God is friendship reaching out to His creation. • A true friend is there for you. • “No longer do I call you servants…but I have called you friends…(John 15: 15) • Friendship began in Heaven, not on earth.

Outline 1. What is a friend? 2. How can friendship go wrong? 3. Can friendship be revived? 4. Your truest friend always?

1. What is a friend? Proverbs 20: 6 - Many a man proclaims his own steadfast love, but a faithful man who can find? ESV Proverbs 20: 6 - Many a man claims to have unfailing love, but a faithful man who can find? NIV • The gospel creates good friends in Christ. • When you find a good friend, prize them. Nurture that friendship. Proverbs 17: 17 - A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity. • Acceptance, forgiveness and constancy.

• Proverbs 27: 17 - Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another. • Honesty, encouragement and correction. • A true friend makes you better by respectful confrontation. Proverbs 24: 26 - Whoever gives an honest answer kisses the lips. • We need wisdom not just in what to say, but how and when to say it? Proverbs 27: 6 - Faithful are the wounds of a friend; profuse are the kisses of an enemy. • You will never become wise without allowing a Christian friend to speak into your life.

2. How can friendship go wrong? Proverbs 17: 9 - Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends. • The wise person covers offenses with forgiveness. • You and I are constantly creating the conditions we will be stuck with five minutes from now. Proverbs 11: 12 - Whoever belittles his neighbor lacks sense, but a man of understanding remains silent. Proverbs 25: 17 - Let your foot be seldom in your neighbor's house, lest he have his fill of you and hate you. • Friendships need breathing room.

Proverbs 18: 19 - A brother offended is more unyielding than a strong city, and quarreling is like the bars of a castle. • Disagreements and quarrels can enter a friendship • Sometimes losing the argument retains the friendship Proverbs 17: 14 - The beginning of strife is like letting out water, so quit before the quarrel breaks out. • Quarrels can escalate. • Let it go. Is it worth the fight? Proverbs 22: 10 - Drive out a scoffer, and strife will go out, and quarreling and abuse will cease. • “Drive out the scoffer” – Show them the door • It’s a heart issue

3. Can friendship be revived? Proverbs 20: 22 - Do not say, "I will repay evil"; wait for the Lord, and he will deliver you. • Patience and persistence • God, not you is the judge and avenger. Proverbs 28: 13 - Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy. • Confessing and forsaking ones sins. • Open, honest truth telling.

Proverbs 25: 21 -22 - If your enemy is hungry, give him bread to eat, and if he is thirsty, give him water to drink, for you will heap burning coals on his head, and the Lord will reward you. • Absorb the betrayal of others. • Only Christ can change a human heart.

4. Your truest friend always Proverbs 18: 24 - A man of many companions may come to ruin, but there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. ESV Proverbs 18: 24 - A man of too many friends comes to ruin, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother. NASU • There is both a giving and a receiving in a true friendship. • John 15: 13 - Greater love has no one than this, that someone lays down his life for his friends.

• What do you and I have in common with Christ? Everything that matters most. • He cares about your sin • He cares about your future • He thinks about you • He understands you • He loves you • You are not alone. He is here now for you.

So what? 1. Refocus 2. Repent 3. Rejoice 4. Receive “God has ordained that we be related to other believers in such a way that we can help each other fight the fight of faith successfully day in and day out until the end. Develop the kind of Christian relationships in which you help each other hold fast to the promises of God and escape the deceitfulness of sin. Exhort one another day in and day out to stand fast and put on the whole armor of God. ” (Heb. 3: 12 -14). John Piper