Emotional intelligence LPCH Coaches February 8 2016 Emotional

Emotional intelligence LPCH Coaches February 8, 2016

Emotional Intelligence • • • Self awareness Self regulation Motivation Empathy Social Skill Goleman, What Makes a Leader? , Harvard Business Review 1998

Self awareness • I can recognize my emotions as I experience them • I know my strengths and weaknesses • I ask people for feedback on what I do well an how I can improve www. mindtools. com

Emotion Regulation Gross, 2013

Tools • 360 feedback • Observation with verbatim recording • Videotaping • Prompted feedback • Temperament, strengths inventories

Tools • Mindfulness exercises • Written reflection or coached debriefing • Critical incidents • Personal SWOT analysis • Values • Triggers • Locus of control, sphere of influence

Empathy

Ask • Ideas • Impact • Feelings • Expectations

Trust 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. Talk straight Demonstrate respect Create transparency Right wrongs Show loyalty Deliver results

Trust 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. Get better Confront reality Clarify expectations Practice accountability Listen first Keep commitments Extend trust Covey, The 13 Behaviors of a High Trust Leader

Mindset • Learn to hear your fixed mindset voice • Recognize you have a choice • Talk back with a growth mindset • Act on the growth mindset Carol Dweck -http: //mindsetonline. com/changeyourmindset/firststeps/inde x. html

Consider Observed Behavior Observer’s Interpretation Feedback

Interpretations “I barely know what’s going on in my own head, and I have special access to that. ” Charles Dwyer, Ph. D Influencing People Skills Lab LPCH, July 2009

Consider Observed Behavior Observer’s Interpretation Feedback

Untangling Feedback • Assume good intentions • Describe behavior • Explain the impact of behavior • Take responsibility for your impressions & interpretations • Ask. Don’t guess at intentions or internal states • Acknowledge gaps between intentions, internal states and outward impressions

How to resist feedback • Explain • Defend • Rationalize • Deny • Ignore • Patronize • Discredit • Crumble • Attack

Tips • Listen without interrupting • Acknowledge, consider • Restate, summarize • Ask clarifying questions • Write it down • Do not explain, deny, defend…