Dr Susan G Weinberger Mentor Consulting Group Dr

Dr. Susan G. Weinberger Mentor Consulting Group Dr. Mentor@aol. com www. Mentor. Consulting. Group. com SEEKING MENTORS FOR OUR YOUNG PEOPLE

RAPP WEBCHAT 1. 2. 3. 4. When young people today are surrounded by multiple mentors, they are successful. Mentors serve as key advocates, guiding youth, opening doors to needed resources and opportunities and just being there as a caring friend. Grandparents and other relatives who are raising children cannot do it all alone. They can turn to community mentors to assist. This web chat examines the role of mentors and where and how families can recruit them for their children.

INFORMAL MENTORS Who were the informal mentors in your life from early years until today? Teacher, member of the clergy, high school coach, parent, grandparent or the neighbor next door. Some youth have the ability to seek and find mentors on their own.

Formal Youth Mentoring Structured and trusting relationship that brings young people together with caring individuals who offer guidance, support and encouragement. Youth develop competence and character. Programs are based on quality standards: www. mentoring. org

MENTORING STANDARDS Elements of Effective Practice established by experts MENTOR/National Mentoring Partnership Website: www. mentoring. org TEN STEPS TO SUCCESS Long-range plan Recruitment plan Screening of mentors Mentor/Mentee training Matching strategies Weekly sessions Support and supervision Recognition and retention Closure steps Evaluation

MENTORING PROGRAM DESIGN Minimum requirement: Mentors and youth (mentees) meet one hour week. On-site, school or in the community. 1: 1; buddy, group or e-mentoring. Best design involves the family.

BEGINNING A PROGRAM 1. Does your agency have a strong infrastructure to build a program? 2. Do staff and Board understand the concept of mentoring? 3. Start small. Long term and quality matches are the goal. 4. Determine what fits for you – site, community or e-mentoring?

BEGINNING A PROGRAM 5. Select only the right mentors who are committed, patient, caring and understand the needs of your families. They must pass the screening process. 6. Grandparents must give permission. 7. Ensure on-going support of the matches. 8. Measure outcomes and report results.

CREATE AN ADVISORY BOARD Expand current or create new one Remember the 3 “W’s” Wisdom Work Wealth And perhaps “Wit”

ADVISORY BOARD MEMBERS Parent Accountant Mentor Lawyer Youth Pediatrician Clergy Public Relations Business Marketing Educator Politician Fundraiser Banker Grant Writer Web Designer Media Law enforcement Other friends? _____

FINDING A MENTOR FOR YOUTH START THE INQUIRY IN THE COMMUNITY: 1. School district 2. Boys & Girls Club 3. United Way 3. Voluntary Action Agency 4. Big Brother Big Sister agency 5. Churches and synagogues 6. www. mentoring. org

FINDING A GOOD MENTOR Ask each agency if they follow the Elements of Effective Practice that govern all quality programs. (mentoring. org). Process includes mentor screening (criminal background checks), references, in-person interview, training, matching with youth and on-going training and match supervision.

APPROPRIATE MENTORS Individuals who 1) Present no physical, social or emotional threat to children. 2) Have the personal characteristics to create a positive developmental relationship with youth.

QUALITIES OF GOOD MENTORS Stable Provide leadership Show up on time Committed Non judgmental Confidential Patient Listen well

QUALITIES, continued Like kids Good sense of humor Tolerant Reliable Outstanding record of employment Do not interfere with program policies & procedures Do not replace role of parent or guardian Willing to assume the key role as a youth’s ADVOCATE

DETERMINING THE SUITABILITY OF APPLICANTS AS MENTORS Ability to commit the necessary time and emotional resources Commitment to youth development Evidence of dependability Positive attitudes toward youth, race, culture and economic status Ability to adhere to rules Evidence of ability to form and sustain a meaningful relationship

RECRUITING MENTORS WHERE WILL THEY COME FROM? Business and Chamber of Commerce Retirees Parents Alumni Associations Faith community Fire and police Municipal employees Hospitals and health facilities Higher education Social service agencies FBI and IRS United Way Hotels

RECRUITING MENTORS Senior Citizens Labor Media Organizations Military Peers Parents of staff Couples Teachers Politicians Bus Drivers Justice Youth Serving organizations

MENTOR SCREENING Application and release statement Face-to-face interview Personal reference checks Employment history Last 5 residences Criminal background checks Child abuse registry Driving record

INTERVIEW PROCESS Why do you want to be a mentor? Prior experiences working with youth? Have you ever been impacted by a mentor? Personal interests and hobbies Special transportation requirements A word that describes you Strengths and weaknesses What you hope to get out of the experience And ask a reference for the mentor: Would you trust this applicant with your OWN child?

GRANDPARENTS/GUARDIANS/ CARETAKERS Written approvals by Grandparents/Parents/Guardian/Caretakers to allow their child to be in your mentoring program. Release form for media: interviewing, filming, and photographing.

FAMILY ROLE IN APPLICATION PROCESS Families receive written program overview Complete written parental permission form Secure permission in first language of home Complete questionnaire requesting perceptions of their child’s strengths and challenges, interpersonal relationships, areas of concern, interests and abilities Media release signatures required

YOUTH SELECTION PROCESS GENERAL DESCRIPTION Not all one economic status, race or from single parents Major reasons for selection: Unmotivated Unchallenged Needing an extra push Terminology: at the brink of success

YOUTH AT SCHOOL Hurting academically Poor attendance Tend to give up Unprepared for class Unable to take risks Raise hands infrequently Hostile and angry Poor peer relationships

YOUTH PERSONALLY Needy Insecure Lack self esteem Feel helpless No control over their lives Seek attention inappropriately

YOUTH SOCIALLY Don’t trust others Trouble relating to peers and adults Smile infrequently Unhappy Unenergetic Poor communication Involved in risky behavior Issues with law enforcement

WHAT WE KNOW ABOUT MENTOR TRAINING On-going training over the life of matches may increase the likelihood of longer lasting relationships On-going training has been found to predict more positive youth outcomes Du. Bois et. al (2002)

MENTOR TRAINING TOPICS Policies and procedures Improving listening skills How to communicate with youth Gift giving Physical contact Mandated reporting of abuses Confidentiality Cultural sensitivity Instilling self esteem Goal setting Location of mentoring: site or community based Strategies for each session Duration of program and time commitment Working with parents/families of mentees

MENTEE TRAINING Willingness to participate Role of mentee’s parent Goals of program Policies and procedures around gifts, location, time and duration of program Responsibility of mentee to be there

AGE APPROPRIATE ACTIVITIES Younger youth: reading, library, computer, arts and crafts, games, music, foreign language, sports, goal setting Older youth: community service, career direction, post secondary education, financial independence, resume, job readiness skills, design a business card, academics, goal setting

MENTOR AS ADVOCATE Help explore the youth’s talents and interests. Talks with other people who are important for a youth. Explore educational opportunities after high school. Seek a tutor. Interacts with others on youth’s behalf.

MENTOR AS ADVOCATE Talks to the family about home and school. Works with the family on behalf of the youth. Talks to teachers about school performance. Researches opportunities to benefit youth and family. Helps youth to get engaged in after school programming.

MENTOR AS ADVOCATE Impacts include improved attitudes, school and after school club attendance, self esteem, academics, peer and family relationships, avoidance of risky behavior and the desire to stay in school though high school graduation. Approach is two directional.

ROLE OF STAFF Difference between a mentoring program that fizzles and dies or lasts the long term is STAFF. SUPPORTING THE MATCH How frequently must you check on both mentors and mentees?

SUPPORT OF MATCHES Across all types of mentoring programs, volunteers who are offered continuing support and supervision are more likely to persist than those who are not contacted regularly by staff

SAD FACTOID RESEARCH 20% of surveyed mentors almost never talked to staff 9% had no staff contact at all Source: Sipe 2000

MATCH SUPERVISION How is progress documented? What questions does staff ask when they meet with mentors about their progress? How is information about mentors/mentees collected? How are problems between mentors and mentees resolved?

FREQUENCY OF CONTACT WITH PAIRS BY STAFF Initial contact with mentor and mentee within first 2 weeks of the match. Many programs contact mentors after 2 weeks but not mentees. Then contact 2 weeks later Finally monthly is match is going okay.

THREE IMPORTANT QUESTIONS 1. How are you doing? 2. What can I do to help you? 3. What are your issues and concerns?

ROLE OF PARENTS/CAREGIVERS F. A. M. I. L. Y. Model = Families and Mentors Involved in Learning with Youth No longer just parents but grandparents and others. Invite caregivers to 2 -3 special events each year. Make sure the events are at convenient times for working families. Provide 3 important attractions: food, transportation and babysitting if necessary. Plan special topics for each session.

PROGRAM GOALS Providing the caregivers of mentees with: Understanding of the importance of mentoring Effective involvement strategies to improve their own youth’s performance. Participation in their child’s education and future – working with teachers and others.

F. A. M. I. L. Y Series TOPICS VARY BUT SHOULD INCLUDE: Communicating with your child Reading to and with your child Helping with homework Setting up a reading corner at home Building self confidence in youth Conflict resolution tips Effective listening skills

BRINGING CLOSURE THE EXIT INTERVIEW Talk to program coordinator first Try different strategies Decision to end relationship Set a specific date for a meeting in person Be honest and candid Talk about your feelings Encourage mentee to share feelings Be positive and supportive Don’t ever make promises you cannot keep

RECOGNITION During the course of the mentoring program and at the end of each year, mentors, mentees, program staff and families are recognized for their efforts in many different ways EXAMPLES: Year end thank you event Birthday cards from mentees to mentors Features on mentors in school/company/agency newsletters Media stories – radio, Television, newspaper Sponsored gifts Notes of appreciation from program Holiday cards January is National Mentoring Month

PROGRAM EVALUATION Pre-post surveys to: Mentors Mentees Teachers/Educators Program Staff Grandparents/Caregivers

MENTOR CONSULTING GROUP Dr. Susan G. Weinberger President 3 Inwood Road Norwalk, CT USA 06850 -1017 Office: (203) 846 -9608 Dr. Mentor@aol. com www. Mentor. Consulting. Group. com