DIVORCE DIVORCE TRENDS AMERICANS LIKE MARRIAGE One of

DIVORCE

DIVORCE TRENDS • AMERICANS LIKE MARRIAGE: One of highest marriage rates in industrialized world. • AMERICANS DON’T LIKE MARRIAGE: One of the highest divorce rates in world. • AMERICANS LIKE MARRIAGE: One of the highest remarriage rates in the world (1/3 remarry within a year).

50% • 50% of all marriages are likely to end in Divorce. • By 1974 more marriages ended in divorce than by death.

WHAT IS THE PROBLEM HERE? Discuss: 1. When people get married today they don’t need to make a commitment because it is so easy to get a divorce. 2. Social scientists are increasingly viewing divorce as one path in the “normal” family life cycle. 3. Is falling out of love an appropriate reason for wanting a divorce? What is? 4. Is divorce the problem or is it a solution to other problems? 5. Death is easier for children to accept than divorce.

COHABITATION MYTH: Living together improves chances for a successful marriage. FACT: Couples who cohabit have higher divorce rates than couples who do not. MYTH: “If we live together, we’ll get married sooner. ” FACT: Living together delays long-term commitment.

HOW CAN WE PREVENT DIVORCE? • Make getting out of marriage more difficult? It used to be hard with a reason. • Encourage women to stay home with children so they can’t afford to get out? (Large contributor to likelihood of divorce. ) • Encourage family & self sacrifice and less selffulfillment? • Impose more religious constraints? • Should we re-stigmatize divorce?

FACTORS AFFECTING DIVORCE • The shift from agriculture to industrialization undermined many of the families traditional functions. • Social integration – the degree of interaction between individuals. • America emphasizes individualism and this can take priority over family.

FACTORS LEADING TO DIVORCE • The most common cause of divorce is selfishness. • It could be selfishness with time, money, work, caring and communication. • Other factors of divorce may be changing value system, physical and emotional abuse, religious differences or alcohol/substance abuse.

DEMOGRAPHIC FACTORS AFFECTING DIVORCE: WHO IS MORE LIKELY TO DIVORCE? • Low • High or low income? • Woman has the higher or lower • Higher income? • Low • High or low education? • More or less religion? • Less • Religion? (Jewish, Catholic, • Protestant) • Race? (white, African American or Hispanic) • African American • Younger or older at time of • Younger marriage? • Second • 1 st or 2 nd marriage? • Parents married or divorced? • Divorced

ASPECTS OF LIFE AFFECTING DIVORCE: • Adolescent marriages = twice the likelihood of divorce • Premarital pregnancy does not significantly increase likelihood of divorce. • But it increases if she; • is an adolescent. • drops out of high school. • faces economic problems.

THE ACTUAL DAY-TO-DAY FAMILY PROCESSES MAY BE THE MOST IMPORTANT FACTOR In descending order: (first one is more likely) • Personality problems • Home life • Authoritarianism • Differing values Majority of divorce is caused by the idealization of marriage. Must realize marriage is like LIFE – it is a lifelong commitment involving considerable sacrifice. It is hard and has many problems.

PULLING APART IN STAGES: • Isolation— Partners withdraw emotionally and no longer share intimacy • Invalidation— Partners respond negatively to each other; such as accusing and belittling • Betrayal— Trust is broken and support is absent

HOW MARRIAGES ARE ENDED • Annulment • Legal Separation • Divorce

ANNULMENT • State that a legal marriage never took place. • Must involve a lawyer and religious leader.

LEGAL SEPARATION • The grounds for legal separation (separation from bed and board) in North Dakota divorce law are: (1) irreconcilable differences; (2) adultery; (3) confinement for incurable insanity for a period of 5 years; (4) conviction of a felony; 5) willful desertion; (6) cruel and inhuman treatment; (7) willful neglect; (8) habitual intemperance (drunkenness). The spouse filing for legal separation must be a resident of North Dakota for at least 6 months prior to the entry of the legal separation or commencement of the action.

DIVORCE PROCESS Not a single event but a complex process Do you see a judge? Do you go to trial? • Attorneys never work to reconcile a divorcing couple – • 90% are NO CONTEST No Fault Divorce (irreconcilable differences, neither party responsible) • Cost?

NO FAULT DIVORCE • • • All 50 states have adopted “No Fault Divorce” No one is guilty No adversary process Settlements are based on equity and need Promotes gender equality Who might be at a disadvantage due to “No Fault Divorce”?

ND GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE • A divorce may be granted in North Dakota divorce law for either no-fault or fault grounds. • The sole no-fault ground is irreconcilable differences. • Annulment

ND GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE • Fault grounds include: (1) adultery; (2) confinement for incurable insanity for a period of 5 years; (3) conviction of a felony; (4) willful desertion; (5) cruel and inhuman treatment; (6) willful neglect; (7) habitual intemperance (drunkenness). • .

ATTITUDES ABOUT DIVORCE What is your opinion about: • Staying married for the sake of the children • Impact of divorce on children • Single parenting • Children living between two households • Child support • Alimony • Remarriage • Being a stepmother/stepfather

DONE

MARITAL SEPARATION **A more crucial event than the divorce 1. SEPARATION DISTRESS: Situational anxiety caused by separation from an attachment figure. • 2 nd only to death of a spouse • All attentions are centered on spouse with feelings of anxiety & fear • Sometimes immediate effect of separation is euphoria, but usually slips into separation anxiety • Slowly gives way to loneliness

MARITAL SEPARATION 2. UNCOUPLING: a quiet detachment of one of the spouses 3. NEW SELF: Post-divorce identity has two stages: • The transition period with separation distress and loneliness. • The recovery period with stable life and less emotion.