DISAGREEMENT SUCCESS Simon Keyes Lets disagree Which came

DISAGREEMENT SUCCESS Simon Keyes

Let’s disagree! Which came first? or

When you disagree…? • Where does your information come from? • What life experience has led you to this position? • Is your position your own? • What emotions do you experience when you hear different positions?

Let’s disagree! • Is free market wealth creation the best means of alleviating poverty? • Is Jesus the only way to salvation? • Is a two state solution in Israel/Palestine still possible ?

When you disagree…? • Where does your information come from? • What life experience has led you to this position? • Is your position your own? • What emotions do you experience when you hear different positions?

Disagreement Success/Failure Difference Polarisation Complexity Conflict

1. The Threat? Difference

2. Polarising Factors • • • Fear Prejudice History Belief Self interest Peer pressure

3. Patterns of Escalation Curiosity Listen Maintain Connections De-personalise Seek understanding Take responsbility Complexity Take Sides Select/ignore info Assume & attribute Personalise/generalise Devalue Demonise Conflict

Strategies for moving from conflict to complexity 3 Explore threat Threat? Curiosity Take Sides Listen Maintain Connections Select/ignore info 4. Assume & attriibute Pr De-personalise ok 1 D ov Personalise/generalise Develop understanding Devalue te ala ss 5 Seek Transformation ne Conflict sc re wa Demonise 2 Depolarise Complexity e-e ea Take responsbility

Summary of possible interventions 1. De-escalate 2. De-polarise 3. Explore threat 4. Stimulate awareness 5. Seek transformation

How not to disagree…

Disagreement a way we can learn from difference “I say, love your enemies” Jesus (Matthew 5: 44) “Your enemy is your best teacher” HH The Dalai Lama