Definition of Conflict is an expressed struggle between

Definition of Conflict is an expressed struggle between at least two interdependent parties who perceive incompatible goals, scarce rewards, and interference from the other party in achieving those goals.

Eastern Civilization

Western Civilization Machiavellian “It is better to be feared than loved. ”

Conflict Styles ©Nonassertive behavior (Avoidance) ©Indirect Communication (The Hint) ©Passive Aggression (Crazymaking) © Direct Aggression (A Time to Kill) ©Assertion Without Aggression (The Clear Message Format)

Clear Message Format ©Behavior ©Interpretation ©Feeling ©Consequence ©Intention

Behavior ©Describe event without interpretation ©Describe problem without emotive language ©Avoid judgmental language ©Objective tone ©WHAT HAPPENED?

Interpretation ©“I thought” ©Your interpretation ©Subjective tone ©HOW YOU SEE IT

Feeling ©“I felt” ©Adjectives that accurately describe your feelings. ©Subjective ©Own your feelings

Consequence ©What happens to you? ©What happens to the person you are addressing? ©What happens to others? ©What happens to the circumstances? ©Objective tone

Intention ©Where you stand on the issue ©Requests of others ©Description of how you are going to act in the future

Win-Win Problem Solving A Systematic Approach

Identify the problem ©Identify YOUR problem and unmet needs ©The problem is yours; what are the unmet needs that make you feel the way you do?

Make a Date to Meet

Describe Your Problem and Needs

Partner Checks Back ©Make sure you are understood ©FEEDBACK

Solicit Partner’s Needs ©Check your understanding ©FEEDBACK

Negotiate a Solution ©Generate a number of solutions ©Evaluate them ©Decide on the best

Follow up Implement and check back