Dating Violence Definition and Warnings Dating and Domestic

Dating Violence Definition and Warnings

Dating and Domestic Violence • A pattern of behavior used to establish power and control over another person through fear and intimidation, often including the threat or use of violence. • Occurs when one person believes they are entitled to control another person and the parties are involved in an intimate relationship.

Statistics on teen dating violence • 1 in 8 teens will experience physical violence in a dating relationship. • 1 in 4 will be in an abusive relationship, although it may not involve physical violence • 80% of the assaults will include pushing, shoving, slapping and grabbing. • 95%of the reported incidents are committed by males • Victims and abusers come from all different social and economic backgrounds.

Types of dating violence • Physical Can begin with threats of violence, punching fist through wall, escalate to pushing, slapping restraining etc. Finally it becomes life threatening. • Sexual--Can be unwanted touching, coercive or rape • Psychological--Mental violence can include constant verbal abuses, harassment, excessive possessiveness, isolating abused party from others. Destruction of property.

Warning signs of a partner who may become violent • Wants to get serious quickly. Will not take NO for an answer. Is jealous and possessive. Wants to pick partners friends and activities. • Is controlling and bossy. Makes the decisions. Put downs when alone or with friends. • Makes partner feel guilty, “If you really loved me you would…” • Blames the victim for what is wrong. ”It’s because of you that I get so angry.

Warning Signs, pt 2 • Apologizes for violent behavior, “I’ll never do it again. ” • Has strong traditional ideas about what a man should be and what a woman should be. • Abuses alcohol and drugs • Tends to use violence to solve their problems. Gets in fights, has a quick temper.

Why teens stay in violent relationships • Afraid parents will make them break up • They are embarrassed or ashamed. • They are afraid the violence will escalate if they try to end the relationship • Convinced it’s their fault or that parents will blame them or be disappointed. • May think this is what a relationship is about. No experience with healthy dating relationships.

Why teen stay pt. 2 • Afraid of losing privileges, car etc. • Believe that being involved with someone is the most important thing in their life. • They confuse jealousy with love • They do not realize they are being abused. • Think friends and family won’t believe them. • They have lost touch with friends • There is a mix of good times, and hope along with manipulation intimidation and fear

What to do if in an abusive relationship • Realize that it is not their fault or normal • Tell someone and ask for help to end the relationship. – – – Parents Friends Trusted adult Counselor Professional mental health worker Police