Conflict Resolution with Family or Friends Win Win

Conflict Resolution with Family or Friends Win -Win Solutions Edited by: Teresa Griffin, Oak Canyon Junior High and students Annie Madsen, Lindsay Clegg

Definitions n n Conflict: Two people disagree on something. n n Conflict Resolution: Resolves conflicts in a positive way, by understanding others point of view. n n n Win-Win Conflict Resolution: A compromise so everyone will win. Avoids competition and arguing.

What Doesn’t Work to Resolve Conflicts? Yelling, Refusing to work out the conflict, • Name calling, • Hitting, • Most Passive and Aggressive Behaviors. • •

3 Behavior Styles used in Relationships to resolve conflict 1. Aggressive 2. Passive 3. Assertive

Aggressive Behavior n My rights are more important than other people’s rights! n My Attitude: “I’m never wrong” “Everyone should be like me”

Passive Behavior n. I consider others rights, not my own. n. I don’t express my true feelings, and always agree with others.

Assertive Behavior § Win-Win attitude -- Everybody wins something § I listen to others, but still stand up for myself.

Win-Win Solutions n Lose-Lose: The Downward Spiral n You Lose ---- Other Person Loses n Lose-Win: The Door-Mat n You Lose --- Other Person Wins n Win-Lose: The Bulldozer n You Win - Other Person Loses n Win-Win: The All You Can Eat Buffet n You Win - Other Person Wins

Lose-Lose “The downward spiral” This is when nobody wins and the conflict is not solved.

Win-Lose You Win - Other Person Loses “The Bulldozer” One person wins, the other loses.

Lose-Win You Lose --- Other Person Wins “The doormat” One person wins, the other loses.

Win-Win “The All You Can Eat Buffet!!”-Each person gets what they want! Both people win and the conflict is resolved!

Goldilocks and Three Bears Conflict

What Does work to resolve Conflict between people? • Assertive Behaviors • Win-Win Attitude § Co-operation

*Who Owns the Problem? The person who is Negatively affected by the problem or conflict. *What is the Owner’s responsibility? To find a way to resolve the problem, even if he is Not the cause of it.

In order to solve problems, you will need to be able to see things from several points of view! Can you do it?

Eskimo or Indian?

Young or Old Woman?

What do you see? Anything else?

Brainstorm all possible solutions to solve problems using win-win solutions n Think of any and all possible ways to solve the problem so that everyone will win something and be happy! n Evaluate later NOT NOW n Do not criticize any suggestion until it is time to evaluate and make a decision.

Hug O’War by Shel Silverstein I will not play a tug o' war I'd rather play a hug o' war, Where everyone hugs Instead of tugs Where everyone giggles And rolls on the rug, Where everyone kisses And everyone grins And everyone cuddles And everyone wins.