Conflict Resolution Robert Jordan Workshop Objectives Define Conflict

Conflict Resolution Robert Jordan

Workshop Objectives Define Conflict Discuss the nature of conflict Present factors which impact on dealing with conflict in the workplace Discuss the 3 types of conflict Explore 5 basic responses to conflict Provide attendees with practical approaches for resolving conflict within the workplace

Conflict is defined as a protracted disagreement. It is serious in nature and serves to derail productivity and relationships.

The true nature of conflict Like death and taxes conflict is always going to occur On average managers spend about 20% of their time attempting to resolve conflict The primary stimulus occurs when someone threatens something we care about. Do not believe for even a moment…that the only people affected by the conflict are the participants.

Impact factors when dealing with conflict in the workplace Relationships Values Communication Style Expectations Life Experience Culture Gender

Relationships Peer to Peer Supervisor to direct reports Supervisor to Supervisor Program to outside entities

Values Heart. Share/Organizational Personal/Life Experiences/Family Professional/Work Experiences

Communication Style The communication styles the parties employ can either help resolve or contribute to the conflict Aggressive Assertive Passive Non-responsive Confusing {Mix Messages} Non-verbal communication

Expectations “The Should’s ” are things that your expect others to just know or do. It is these presumptions that can lead us down the road to conflict. Do your job Be courteous Listen to supervisor Come in on time Show up for work

Life Conditions The more “stressors” around us the more likely there will be increased conflict. Finances/Economy Health Family Work Demands Commute

Life Experience Your life experiences create internal bias which can influence your approach to conflict. Being aware of your own frame of reference and other’s frame of reference can significantly improve how you will deal with conflict.

Culture We live in a low context culture which supports speaking our minds and allows us to agree to disagree. Disapproval can be openly communicated. In high context cultures the nuances of the communication take on major importance People tend not to directly confront others. Disapproval is not openly communicated is it often implied

GENDER Research shows that men will often exhibit dominating and completive behavior versus women who will exhibit avoidant and compromising behavior. However surveys & observational studies have discovered more similarities than differences between men & women’s conflict behaviors What do you think?

TYPES OF CONFLICT GOAL CONFLICTS ◦ Disputing parties aim for goals that are basically incompatible, with each party’s goals threatening the goals of the other JUDGEMENT CONFLICTS ◦ The parties differ over factual or empirical issues: i. e. on party feels the other’s conclusion is incorrect. The parties may agree on the goal but disagree on how to attain it NORMATIVE CONFLICTS ◦ one party evaluates the other on the basis of how they should behave, in other words, “correct” behavior

Approaches It’s all chemistry…. . Like it or not there is no set formula to apply for every situation First Deescalate the situation Select a time and place to discuss the situation Lay out the ground rules “No hitting below the belt” Keep it in the present Use active listening Don’t interrupt Establish eye contact Use “I” statements

Approaches cont. Let each party present their side of the story respectfully Ask each party what they see as the solution Validate the parties concerns Express to the parties the expected behavior as they move pass the conflict Check back with them to see if things are going smoothly

Approaches cont. Warning, Warning Do not allow the parties to escalate the situation during the mediation Recognize if you are in over your head and seek assistance

The 5 Typical Responses to Conflict AVOIDING ACCOMODATING COMPETING COLLABORATING COMPROMISING

AVOIDING Avoidance is characterized by denial of the conflict, changing & avoiding topics, being non-committal and joking rather than dealing with the conflict at hand. Avoidance of conflict often leads to a cycle that perpetuates itself.

AVOIDING CONT. Approach Advantage: Can give you time to think of some other response to the conflict. It is useful if the issue is trivial or if other more important issues demand one’s attention. Approach Disadvantage: Avoidance tends to demonstrate to others that one does not “care enough to confront”. It allows conflict to simmer & heat up rather then providing an avenue to reduce it. It sets the stage for a later explosion

ACCOMMODATING The individual does not assert their needs & prefers a cooperative and harmonizing approach. The individual sets aside his/her concerns in favor of pleasing the other people involved.

ACCOMMODATING CONT. Approach Advantages: The accommodator feels they are serving the best interests of the group by sacrificing or stepping aside. Approach Disadvantages: Disadvantages Sometimes people who habitually use this style play the role of martyr, whiner or saboteur.

COMPETING People are focused on their concerns and not those of the other parties. In the conflict situation competitors are looking for a “win”.

COMPETING CONT. Approach Advantage: Competition can be useful when one has to make a quick decision. Can generate creative ideas when best performance is rewarded. Can be used to build teamwork as in sports competition. Approach Disadvantage: Can be harmfully because if one party is unable or unwilling to deal with conflict in a head on manner can encourage one party to go “underground” with the desire to get back at others. Limits outcomes to either winning and losing

COMPROMISING Compromise is a style resulting in some gains & some losses for each party. Compromise is dependent on shared power because if one party is perceived as powerless no compelling reason to compromise exists.

COMPROMISING cont Approach Advantage: It can be used as a backup method when other styles have failed it usually appears reasonable to most parties. Approach Disadvantage: For some people compromise always appears a form of loss rather then a win…. perception “the glass is half empty”

COLLABORATION Collaboration shows a high level of concern for one’s own goals, the goals of others, the successful solution of the problem and the enhancement of the relationships. The parties work creatively to find new solutions that will maximizes goals achievement for both.

COLLABORATION Approach Advantage: Collaboration actively affirms the importance of relationships and goals and builds a team approach to conflict management. Approach Disadvantage: Can only be used if the issues are important as the investment in time and energy have to be worth it. One avoider can frustrate the intention of four collaborators.

Summary: Hindsight is truly 20/20 The reality is over the course of your career you will have many opportunities to practice your conflict resolution approach. You will always see something that you could have said or done to have enhances the conflict situation. My advice is to learn from you “mistakes” and then put your best foot forward.