Communicating and interacting Feelings must be shared Comunication

Communicating and interacting; Feelings must be shared

Comunication has always been necessary for humans. It isn’t a primary or secondary need, but is combined with all other needs.

SPEAKER FEEDBACK LISTENER encoding decoding Channel of communication MESSAGE interference

Here are some messages… And the relevant code

Code: Gesture Supplementing the speech Get out! Code: conventional gestures Move…! Code: symbolic gifts Will you marry me?

From the Gospel of Luke… Code: rituals Code: written Give me the test in class!

Code: MUSICAL and Physical

Proximity All of us have a certain space around our body. This distance that surrounds us separates and protects us from the rest of the world.

oral or written statements Questions descriptions reports cheers Tales stories poetry discussions dialogues recitation prayers songs TONE TIMBRE ACCENT EMPHASIS • The section of the tree which indicates the use of words, is significantly smaller than the ‘non-verbal’ section. • All verbal communication comes from speaking, as the tree sap must cross the trunk in order to reach the branches.

The lower section(non-verbal), hidden from view, is atleast double the size of the section above the surface. (verbal) Body language showing relationships between people (caresses, hugs, bows, threats) Expressions of emotion(smiling, crying, wonder…) Indications of personality (sex, ethnicity, health, age, physical strength…) Artistic expressions (music, dance, painting, sculpture, art…) Actions which complete speech (this tall, stop!, be quiet!) This means that we communicate a lot more throug ‘non-verbal’ language than ‘written or spoken’ language. Our body, actions, behaviour and attitude, clothes, emotions facial expressions, sounds, images, all communicate. Overall: you can’t not communicate.

Axioms of Communication • 1 You can’t not communicate • Communicative behaviour doesn’t have an equal: movement and inactivity, words or silence; all have the ability to communicate, because they influence others which, in turn, can’t not respond to this communication.

2. EVERY COMMUNICATION HAS AN ASPECT OF THE CONTENT AND AN ASPECT OF THE RELATIONSHIP – THE SECOND CLASSIFIES THE FIRST • Communication doesn’t only transmit information, but at the same time it imposes a type of behaviour. Every example of comunication is a type of behaviour, and every type of behaviour is communication. Every second of the day, you are communication through your behaviour: your gaze, way of speaking, posture, and movement. • Relationship specifies the content: metacommunication

3. THE NATURE OF A RELATIONSHIP DEPENDS ON THE PUNCTUATION OF THE SEQUENCE OF COMMUNICATION BETWEEN THE PARTIES • Communication is a continuous exchange of messages which the communicators must PUNCTUATE, organising their exchanges according to a sequence in which a specific response must follow a specific cue

4. HUMAN BEINGS COMMUNICATE EITHER WITH THE NUMERICAL MODEL OR WITH THE ANALOGICAL MODEL • THE NEED FOR COEXISTANCE NUMERIC LANGUAGE broadcasts news and knowledge (I love you) ANALOGIC LANGUAGE broadcasts emotion (a kiss and a cuddle) Ambiguity (Tears? A Smile? )

5. ALL COMMUNICATIVE EXCHANGES ARE BASED ON EQUALITY (symmetrical exchanges) OR DIFFERENCES (complimentary exchanges) • RISK OF BEING PROVED WRONG COMPLIMENTARY • RISK OF BECOMING COMPETITIVE SYMMETRICAL

Personal interpretation of the message IN THE CONTENT 1. Ignore the message 2. Accept part of the message communication is self-affirmation IN THE RELATIONSHIP 1. Accept the other person 2. Ignore the other person 3. Prove the other person wrong 3. Change the content

Behaviour in the relationship Those who see themselves as being small see other people as being big

From a combination of: • How sure we are of ourselves • How highly we regard our communication partner we have four types of behaviour remissive manipulative authoritary Positive relationships