Cleveland State University ESC 720 Research Communications Common

Cleveland State University ESC 720 Research Communications Common Writing Problems Dan Simon 1

Common Writing Problems Look at the grading rubric The abstract needs to summarize your results You need a literature review in the intro You need motivation in the intro When double spacing, indent the first line of each paragraph • Talk about future work in the conclusion • • • 2

Grade (4 points max) Focus Is the focus of the report clear? Is the focus developed adequately? Are opposing viewpoints considered and discussed? Does the report present novel work or creative synthesis? Report Format Title and author information One-inch margins without right justification Double-spaced 12 -point Times New Roman font Appropriate number of pages References and Citations Appropriate number of citations and consistent format Does the report effectively use the references? Abstract Does it provide a good summary of the report? 3

Grade (4 points max) Introduction Background of topic, motivation for research Discussion of related work (literature review) Summary/outline of report Organization Clear and well-integrated sections and subsections Organized paragraph layout and transitions Professional appearance and formatting Consistent layout, well-placed page breaks, etc. Punctuation and grammar Equations numbering, clarity, and format Spelling Tables format, captions, and clarity Figures format, captions, and clarity Conclusion Summary of report Discussion of future work Total Grade (100 points maximum) 4

Abstract: Poor Example Electric bicycles use several different power systems to achieve necessary performance, including fully electric and electric hybrid systems. Because of the extra power involved, there is still an environmental impact for electric bicycles since electricity is mainly produced by burning fossil fuels. Improvements made to bicycles and battery systems have led to a drastic increase in electric bicycle popularity because they allow bicycles to become much lighter and travel farther. … • Does not summarize the results of the report! 5

Abstract: Better Example … This report discusses the environmental impact of electric bicycles. We show that the largest environmental impact is due to the production of battery technology from fossil fuels. However, this impact is much smaller than that of automobiles because of bicycles’ light weight and efficient design. … • Summarizes the results of the report. Quantitative results would be even better. 6

Introduction • Why should the reader care about your report? … As municipalities consider incentives for bicycle use, environmental impacts should play an important part. We show that if we make some simplifying assumptions, increasing commuter bicycle use by 50% could result in a 20% decrease in greenhouse gas emissions. In a typical mediumsized US city, this would result in 15% more days with air quality index (AQI) less than 50, which is considered good air quality. • The intro motivates the research and the reader 7

Literature Review Example … Biogeography motivated the development of an evolutionary algorithm called biogeography-based optimization (BBO). Since its introduction in 2008 [35], BBO has been theoretically analyzed and modeled using Markov theory [14], [36], [37] and dynamic system models [38]. BBO has also been applied to several real-world problems, including robot controller tuning [13], [34], aircraft engine health sensor selection [35], power system optimization [31], groundwater detection [24], mechanical gear train design [33], satellite image classification [23], antenna design [40], and biomedical signal processing [22], [28]. 8

Spacing and Indenting • When single spacing, separate each paragraph with a blank line and do not indent • When double spacing, do not add extra space between lines – instead, indent 9

Spacing and Indenting More work could be done on finding appropriate tuning parameters for DBBO. These tuning parameters could be obtained using either simulation results or the Markov model. For example, we may be interested in solving some specific real-world problem that has a computationally expensive fitness function. We suggest further research to provide problem-dependent guidance for when to use DBBO instead of BBO, and vice versa. We also note that the distributed learning approach proposed here could be implemented in other algorithms. The Markov model developed here could be used to obtain numerical comparisons between BBO, DBBO with various parameter settings, and other EAs. 10

More work could be done on finding appropriate tuning parameters for DBBO. These tuning parameters could be obtained using either simulation results or the Markov model. For example, we may be interested in solving some specific real-world problem that has a computationally expensive fitness function. We suggest further research to provide problem-dependent guidance for when to use DBBO instead of BBO, and vice versa. We also note that the distributed learning approach proposed here could be implemented in other algorithms. … 11

Future Work Discussion • The future work discussion belongs in the conclusion, which is the last numbered section • Sometimes the last section is titled: – Conclusion … or … – Discussion … or … – Conclusion and Future Work 12

Future Work: Example This paper opens up many possibilities for future work. We could conduct additional mathematical modeling to obtain additional insights into DBBO behavior. Some additional modeling and analysis tools that could be applied to DBBO include dynamic system modeling [38], and statistical mechanics and Walsh transform approximations [29]. The Markov models in this paper are specific tools that can be theoretically applied to any population size, but they are limited to the determination of population distributions in the limit as the generation count approaches infinity. Dynamic system models provide population distributions at each generation in the limit as the population size approaches infinity. A dynamic system model of BBO is derived in [38] and could be extended in future work to DBBO. EA population variances can be obtained with statistical mechanics models. A statistical mechanics model of BBO is derived in [18] and could be extended in future work to DBBO. Although we used Markov models in this paper to find the population distribution of DBBO, we did not study the convergence behavior of DBBO. However, Markov models can be used to study convergence behavior. Such a study is conducted in [17] for BBO and could be extended in future work to DBBO. More work could be done on finding appropriate tuning parameters for DBBO. These tuning parameters could be obtained using either simulation results or the Markov model. For example, suppose that we are interested in solving some specific real-world problem that has a computationally expensive fitness function. We could use the Markov model on a small-scale version of the problem to find the best values for mutation rate, migration curve parameters, and so on, rather than relying on simulation results. We suggest further research to provide problem-dependent guidance for when to use DBBO instead of BBO, and vice versa. We also note that the distributed learning approach proposed here could also, with appropriate modifications, be implemented in many other evolutionary algorithms (genetic algorithms, particle swarm optimization, differential evolution, and so on). The Markov model developed here could be used to obtain numerical comparisons between BBO, DBBO with various parameter settings, and other EAs. Finally, we mention that the development of Markov models for BBO and DBBO in continuous state-spaces is an important direction for future research. 13

Common Writing Problems • “Poor Writing Sample. docx” 14

Some Standard Writing Criticisms • • Put the date on the first page. Put your email address on the first page. Number your pages. You did not give an outline of the sections at the end of the introduction. You have a lot of grammatical errors in your report … the CSU Writing Center can help you correct those errors in your assignments. Inconsistent capitalization. The font in the graphics is too small or too fuzzy. You need a conclusion / future work section. 15

Some Standard Slide Criticisms • • • Include an outline immediately after the title slide. On your outline slide, you have too many topics. Put the date on the title slide. Number your slides. You have a lot of grammatical errors in your slides … the CSU Writing Center can help you with that. Write using bullet points, not complete sentences. Inconsistent capitalization. The font in the graphics is too small or too fuzzy. You need a conclusion / future work slide. Acknowledge the source of your photos. 16

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