CHAPTER 2 Planning Business Messages Instructor Only Version

Basics of business writing § Business messages are different from college essays, term papers, and messages to friends. § Conciseness and clarity count. ISTOCKPHOTO. COM/ZSOLT NUYLASZI Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 2

The best business writing is § Purposeful § Persuasive § Economical § Audience oriented Following a process can make you a better writer or speaker. Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 3

The Writing Process Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 4

Approximately how much time should be spent at each stage? Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e 8 e Chapter 2, 1, Slide 5

Analyzing Your Purpose and Channel Identify your purpose. § Why are you writing? § What do you hope to achieve? JON FEINGERSH / ICONICA / GETTY IMAGES Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 6

Select the best channel. E-mail Fax Letter Memo Report Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Telephone Voice mail Meeting Conversation Web site Chapter 2, Slide 7

Select the best channel. § § § How important is the message? How fast do you need feedback? Is a permanent record essential? What is the cost of the channel? How much formality do you desire? How confidential or sensitive is the message? Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 8

Profiling the Audience Primary Audience § Who is the primary reader? § What are my personal and professional relationships with that person? § What does the person know about the subject? § What kind of response should I expect? Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 9

Profiling the Audience Secondary Audience § Who else might see or hear this message? § Are they different from the primary audience? § How must I reshape the message for the secondary audience? Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 10

Spotlight Audience Benefits Create a Message That Suits Your Audience Adapting to Task and Audience Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e 8 e Chapter 2, 1, Slide 11

Spotlight Audience Benefits Focus your statements on the audience, not the sender. Instead of this: Try this: We are promoting a new hospitalization plan that we believe has many outstanding benefits. You will enjoy total peace of mind with our affordable hospitalization plan that meets all your needs. Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 12

Adapting to Task and Audience Spotlight Audience Benefits Create a Message That Suits Your Audience Cultivate A “You” View Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e 8 e Chapter 2, 1, Slide 13

Develop a “You” View Emphasize second-person pronouns (you/your) instead of first-person pronouns (I/we, us, our) Instead of this: Try this: Before we can allow you to purchase items on this new account, we must wait two weeks to verify your credit. You may begin making purchases on your new account in two weeks. Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 14

Develop a “You” View Revise these sentences: These are better: Quick You can now purchase HP computers at Check discounted prices. We are now offering HP computers at discounted prices. We are pleased to announce that you have been approved to enroll in our leadership training program. Congratulations! You have been selected to enter our leadership training program! Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 15

Spotlight Audience Benefits Create a Message That Suits Your Audience Sound Conversational Cultivate A “You” View Adapting to Task and Audience Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e 8 e Chapter 2, 1, Slide 16

Conversational Language Instead of this: Try this: The undersigned takes pleasure in. . . I’m happy to. . . It may be of some concern to you to learn that your check has been received and your account has been credited for $250. We’ve credited your account for $250. Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 17

Spotlight Audience Benefits Employ Positive Language Create a Message That Suits Your Audience Cultivate A “You” View Sound Conversational Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e 8 e Chapter 2, 1, Slide 18

Positive Language Instead of this: Try this: Employees may not use Employees may use the First Street entrance Market Street entrance during remodeling. We cannot fill your order We can fill your order until we receive an exact once we receive an exact model number. Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 19

State Ideas Positively Revise these sentences: These are better: We must withhold payment until you complete the job satisfactorily. You will be paid Quick promptly once the job is Check completed satisfactorily. If you fail to follow each By following each requirement, you will not requirement, you will receive your $50 rebate. Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 20

Levels of Language Use Unprofessional Conversational Formal Business messages, novels, most newspapers, and most magazines Scientific writing, legal documents, scholarly books, formal essays, proclamations Found in Some comic strips and songs, some commercials, some conversations, some IM and e-mail messages Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 21

Levels of Language Use Unprofessional Conversational Formal Correct grammar and punctuation, conversational tone, simple sentence structure, familiar words Correct grammar, serious tone, complex sentence structure, polysyllabic words Characterized by Incorrect grammar, unpredictable sentence structure, inappropriate punctuation, slang, vulgarisms Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 22

Levels of Language Use Unprofessional Conversational Formal ruined catch criticize money intoxicated, drunk I’m not enormous frugal annihilated apprehend disparage currency inebriated I am not prodigious penurious Examples wasted nab bad-mouth dough, bread stewed, plastered I ain’t humongous tight Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 23

Revise to create reader benefits. I have 15 different You have 15 financial plans to offer my plans from which to investors. choose. Quick As a newly hired We want all newly hired. Check employee, you won’t employees to use our carpooling program for at have to drive to work for the first three months least three months. because you can carpool. Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 24

Revise the following to sound conversational. The undersigned takes I’m happy to welcome great pleasure in you to our staff. welcoming you to our staff. Quick Check Per your request, we are sending under separate cover your May invoice. As you requested, we are sending your May invoice separately. Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 25

Hidden Messages Some words and phrases convey a negative and unpleasant tone. They may imply a hidden message that the writer does not intend. Think twice before using the following negative expressions. Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 26

Negative Language Hidden Meaning You overlooked You are careless You state that But I don’t believe you You failed to You are careless You claim that It’s probably untrue You are wrong I am right You do not understand You are not smart Your delay You are at fault You forgot to You are inefficient, stupid and careless Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e 8 e Chapter 2, 1, Slide 27

Spotlight Audience Benefits Use Inclusive Language Create a Message That Suits Your Audience Employ Positive Language Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e 8 e Cultivate A “You” View Sound Conversational Chapter 2, 1, Slide 28

Inclusive Language Instead of this: Try this: Have you called a salesman? Have you called a salesperson? Every executive has his own office. § All executives have their own offices. § Every executive has an office. § All executives have offices. § Every executive has his or her own office. This alternative is wordy and calls attention to itself Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 29

Positive and Inclusive Language Revise these sentences: These are better: No tenant may move in until May 1. Tenants may move in on May 1. Because you failed to include your credit information, we cannot ship your order. Quick Check As soon as we receive your credit information, we can ship your order. Marcello Luna is the new accountant. Mexican accountant. Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 30

Spotlight Audience Benefits Draw on Familiar Words Adopt Plain Language Cultivate A “You” View Create a Message That Suits Your Audience Use Inclusive Language Sound Conversational Use Positive Language Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e 8 e Chapter 2, 1, Slide 31

Plain Language Avoid federalese, bureaucratese, and inflated language. Federalese: Each person to whom the request is herein addressed is henceforth solicited to submit, or to have his or her department representative submit, to the Department of Labor official described above, a comment on whether the proposed plan, in his or her considered view, meets the requirements of the 2003 law. Simple Translation: You may wish to comment on whether the proposed plan meets the requirements of the 2003 law. Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 32

Familiar Words Avoid long, difficult, and unfamiliar words. Use short, simple, and common words whenever possible. Less familiar words Simple alternatives encounter extrapolate obligatory terminate Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e meet project required end Chapter 2, Slide 33

Choose Courteous Language Draw on Familiar Words Adopt Plain Language Spotlight Audience Benefits Create a Message That Suits Your Audience Use Inclusive Language Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e 8 e Cultivate A “You” View Sound Conversational Use Positive Language Chapter 2, 1, Slide 34

Courteous Language Avoid sounding demanding, preachy, or rude. Instead of this: Try this: You must complete this research by June 1. Will you please complete this research by June 1. I am sick and tired of being the only one who removes jammed paper from the copier! Let me show you how to remove jammed paper so that you can complete your copying. Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 35

Revise the following using simple language You may encounter You may have difficulty in terminating the ending the contract. OR: It may be difficult to end the contract. Quick Check As stipulated, we extrapolated the budget figures for two years. As required, we projected the budget figures for two years. Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 36

Revise the following using simple language Will you utilize workbooks Will you use workbooks during the obligatory during the required training period? We anticipate that a majority of the alternative will be sufficiently fundamental to meet our requirements. We expect that most of the choices will be sufficiently basic to meet our needs. Mary Ellen Guffey, Essentials of Business Communication, 8 e Chapter 2, Slide 37