What is Bullying? • Bullying is harming others repeatedly and over time.
A bully carries out negative actions on someone who has difficulty being able to defend himself/herself. The bully uses: • Physical Contact • Words • Indirect ways such as: - Spreading rumors - Intentionally excluding someone from a group
Bullying is: • Classified as proactive aggression • Done by one person or by a group • Is an unfair match since the bully is either physically, verbally, and/or socially stronger than the victim • Most bullies have weak to nonexistent father figures (Berdondini & Smith as cited by Curtner-Smith)
Facts about Bullies: Bullying has been implicated in many school shootings, including March 2001 slayings of two students in Santee, CA and 1999 Massacre of 13 at Columbine High School.
Factors in the Home Environment: • Family relationships of bullies tend to be troubled. • Parents of bullies are hostile, rejecting, and Indifferent. • The parents frequently use punishment that is some form of harsh power combined with violent emotional outbursts (Olweus as cited by Curtner. Smith, 2000 • Most bullies have weak to nonexistent father figures (Berdondini & Smith as cited by Curtner-Smith)
Bullying has changed in recent years to be more intense in frequency and seriousness (Beane, 1999) • Bullies are not generally popular; however • some bullies are popular and even leaders of aggressive groups like high impact sports or even gangs (Pellegrini et al. ). They may target hot tempered students who lose control.
More facts: • Other research shows that people who were bullied • • as children are prone to depression and low selfesteem as adults and that bullies are more likely to engage in criminal behavior. Bullying intervention programs in England Norway have shown that school based intervention programs can reduce bullying by 30 -50% (Olweus). Bullies are more likely to have poor grades, smoke, and drink alcohol.
Types of Bullying • Rejection - Young people fear rejection. They crave acceptance and will do just about anything to get it.
Terrorizing is the use of fear to torment and manipulate. - Perpetrators do this to: • Achieve dominance • Obtain payoffs like: - Money - Material items - Status with peers - Power
Isolating This involves cutting someone off from essential relationships. The irony is that isolating students can actually drive them to pair up in their estrangement from the larger group and become dangerous.
Corrupting Influencing a student to learn ways of thinking, speaking, and acting that make him or her increasingly unfit for normal healthy experiences. Examples include: - Students who speak, using angry and obscene language. - Students who are antisocial. - Students who mock those who work hard in school. - Students who endorse negative activities like cutting class. (Garbarino, 2003) - Gesture Abuse • Threatening or obscene gestures • Menacing stares • Deliberately turning away to ignore someone (Rigby, 2001)
Effects of Bully’s Behavior • • • Many students are frightened. A climate of fear exists in the classroom. Some students think it is funny when they see the immature behavior of a bully. School time is wasted. Students who are being bullied are threatened and become highly emotional and upset and afraid to come to school. Physically weak students may follow the bully for protection. The teacher may loose power in the classroom. A negative atmosphere is created. The teacher may become afraid of the bully.
Girls demonstrate their aggressiveness by: • Slander • Spreading of rumors • Intentional exclusion of the group • Manipulation of friendship relations • Malicious gossip • Backstabbing • Lying about others
It is believed that this is because the media is beginning to glamorize this. (Prothrow. Smith, 2002) An interesting fact about girl victims is that girls who mature early are commonly victims of bullying. (Viadero, 1997)
Five Mistakes Teachers Make with Bullies What You need to do Instead! Publicly put down the bully. This is often done with the intention of helping the victim feel better. It backfires because the bully feels like “he has lost face” in front of his peers.
Threaten the bully. Threats do not work with this child. It is better to tell the bully what to expect and then always follow through.
Treat the bully inconsistently. The bully, like other children, needs consistency and structure. Always treat the bully so that he/she knows what to expect.
Try and bribe the bully. This only adds fuel to the bully’s need to feel important in negative ways. Instead, work with the bully to have the bully come up with consequences for his/her own behavior.
Overlook the bully’s Behavior Correct Behavior immediately
Implementing an Anti-Bullying Program • The Basics - Awareness-raising of students, faculty, and parents - Consultation with parents, school psychologists, and outside sources - Development of draft policy and procedures including data based monitoring protocol - Finalize and disseminate policies and procedures with students, parents, teachers, and staff. - Training of teachers and staff. - Implementation of program. - Evaluation and adjustments as needed on a regular basis. (Carney and Merrell)
The How-To’s for handling bullies • Class Discussions - Who can tell me what bullying is? - What happens to people who are bullied? - How do you think bullies feel? - What’s it like to see someone get bullied? - Do you think that bullying is a problem in our classroom? - Who would like to have a bully-free classroom? - What do we do to make our classroom bully-free?
Discuss the NO-BULLY POLICY Have the children discuss what it means to have a “no-bully” policy. Students learn to refuse to join in or watch bullying. Students learn to say, “Don’t do or say that. It’s not right. ” (Beane, 1999)
OUR CLASSROOM • • • We treat each other with respect. We speak up if we see others being treated unfairly. We like it that people are different. We don’t have to all dress the same or act the same. We try to solve problems peacefully. We treat each other the way we want to be treated. We have the right to be ourselves. We have the right to be safe. We speak up if we think there is something that is not safe.
Empathy: The #1 Link to Changing Bully Behavior • It’s very important to teach bullies to have appropriate REMORSE.
EMPATHY • Empathy is the ability to identify with and understand how another person feels. It is the ability to put yourself into someone else’s place.
Empathy • It is important to have empathy in order to build positive relationships. • Children need to be taught to empathize not only for those people whom they know in their families, but for others as well.
Ask students questions. • “How do you feel, knowing you have hurt Nita? ” • “How does it feel when someone takes something of yours? ” • “What are you going to do so Nita feels better? ”
“How would you feel…” • If you were new in school? • If you were the shortest kid in school? • If you were the most popular student in school? • If you had a tough home life? • If you did not feel attractive? • If you could not hear well? • If you had to wear thick glasses?
3 Important Rules for Bullies • We will not bully other students. • We will help others who are being bullied by speaking out and by getting adult help. • We will use extra effort to include all students in activities at our school. -Viaadro, 1997
Relevant Take Back Strategies How to Reduce and Stop Bullying Educators need to make sure children know that they need adult help to deal with bullies because of the power imbalance that occurs.
Convey a “can do” attitude to the student. Model confidence that bullying can be changed and that victims can protect themselves. Adults need to have a nonpunitive, matter-of-fact attitude.
The classroom intervention shifts power away from bullies by setting explicit rules against bullying and expecting all students to stand up for the victims.
Caring and reinforcement by adults shifts power toward the caring majority of children.
• Discussion works better than lecture. • The more that children are involved in defining bullying and the strategies to use against it, the more effective the intervention will be. • The classroom teacher is a key component to the success of the program because the teacher can reinforce caring behavior and can remind the students of the bully-proof rules. • Teachers have been found to be more effective when they have a facilitator to help them teach the course. (Garrity, 1997)
My Statement of Responsibility I have a responsibility to tell someone if I am being bullied. I have a responsibility to not remain silent when someone else is bullied. I have a responsibility to speak up on behalf of all students who need help. I will honor that responsibility. _________Student’s name _________Date