Bullying Defined Bullying is a conscious willful deliberate
Bullying Defined: Bullying is a conscious, willful, deliberate, hostile and repeated behaviour by one or more people, which is intended to harm others.
Types of Bullying Include…. • Physical aggression –kicking, hitting, taking or damaging belongings • Social alienation –excluding someone from social groups • Verbal aggression –name-calling, insulting, repeated teasing, racist remarks • Intimidation –spreading nasty rumours, threatening • Sexual or racial harassment –homophobic comments and stereotyping • Cyberbullying -The use of information and communication technologies that supports deliberate, repeated, and hostile behaviour by an individual or group, that is intended to harm others. Cyberbullying includes texting, IMing, Blogs, Social Networks, Youtube, Slamboards, Phone, etc.
Bullying is abuse. It affects the mental and physical health of innocent people.
WHY Do It? Bullies often suffer from social and emotional problems. Some people bully due to low self-esteem, in order to make others feel lower than they do. Others bully because they have not yet learned proper social skills. If you choose to bully, you’re saying more about yourself than you are about the person you are trying to hurt! What message do you the world to know about YOU?
The media glamourizes Bullying, sending a message that it is acceptable and funny – Behaviour is NORMALIZED
O T H E R M O T I V A T O R S
Negative behaviour is passed off as “It’s Just A Joke”…. . and teens are told that being treated this way is typical adolescent behaviour
It’s NOT a Joke And it’s NOT a right of passage
The Role of the Bystander Supporters: Do not take an active role, however support with body language and laughter Passive Supporters: Enjoy watching but do not show support Disengaged Onlookers: Watch but don’t care Possible Defenders: dislike what they see and think they should help, but don’t Defenders: dislike and try to help (ie. Tell an adult)
Bystander Effect You may think that as long as you're not the bully you're not hurting anyone, but that's not true--the bystander plays an important role in a bullying situation. W Most kids feel uncomfortable witnessing bullying, but very few intervene. Why Peers Do Not Intervene • Fear of being the next target • Lack of strategies and skills • Group dynamics – bully = friend; victim = not • Lack of understanding their role • Status management – better to be with the ‘in’ group than stick up I T N E S S
Bully In Sight What to do about it….
There Are No Innocent Bystander you are exactly the audience that the bully wants Why Peers NEED to Intervene Bullying shows that one has power over others. The reason that bullies do it repeatedly is that they are getting away with it. Nobody is calling them on their bad behavior. When they aren't called on it they think, 'Well, it must be O. K. '” The bully counts on bystanders becoming involved in or supporting the Bullying or at least doing nothing to stop it.
What Bystanders Can do… Peers have opportunities, as they see more than adults do. Bullying will end in 10 seconds if someone intervenes. • Recognize bullying -- It's not just physical. It can be social and verbal as well. Telling someone they're "ugly" is considered bullying. Words can break people. • Walk away -- By standing around and watching you encourage the bully. Walk away - get help. • Encourage other bystanders to get involved as a group -- Band together and walk away. • Body language provides instant feedback – negative body language shows disapproval • Keep track of places where bullying is taking place -- If you tell an adult, they will monitor these areas more closely. • Speak up -- Tell the bully that they're wrong and that you won't get involved in any bullying. • HELP the victim -- Put yourself in their shoes. Would you want someone to help you if you were being picked on? • DON'T JOIN IN. Don't call kids names or pick on them. Bullies try to get other kids to join in. • BE A FRIEND to the kid being bullied. Ask them to tell an adult. Go with them if they're scared. • BELIEVE THE KID BEING BULLIED and what they say. • FIND HELP from teachers, parents, friends, or other adults. TELL SOMEONE if you see a kid being bullied. Telling is not tattling! If you're scared of the bully, then don't let them know you told. • DON'T FIGHT THE BULLY. It's not safe. Go tell an adult instead.
Recognize. . Refuse. . . Report
Protect Yourself Against Cyberbullying – an interesting phenomenon. 1 of 4 eleven to nineteen year olds are affected. Adolescents gain a sense of anonymity, even if their name is attached. Teens take on an ‘alter-ego’ and do things they would never do in ‘real’ life.
Cyber Protection • Protect personal information (passwords, etc. ) in e-mail communication and other online activity – EVEN FROM FRIENDS! • Avoid the unknown with regard to electronic messages – e. g. , “learn to discriminate between the important and the potentially harmful” • Block messages using software for cell phones and e-mail • Avoid replying to bullying behaviour • Gather evidence and report incidents to school and other authorities • Never communicate when angry • Keep a buddy list of people you IM with and not ppl you met online • Keep your computer in public at home – you are less affected when others know what is going on • Trust your Spidey senses Don’t Reply – Tell Someone – Report Save! – Screenshot! – Print! – Police
How Can You Avoid Being Bullied? Remember! It’s not your fault and it’s critical to remember that bullies bully because of their own issues – NOT anything you have done! Tell Someone!!!! You are not alone.
It’s Not You, It’s Them! But Until They Can Get Past This Phase…. • JOIN GROUPS and find friends who like the same things you do. LOOK AROUND SCHOOL. You're probably not the only kid being bullied. Make friends with other kids who are alone. Maybe you can help other kids. • WALK TO SCHOOL WITH SOMEONE - brothers, sisters, neighbours or friends. • AVOID BULLIES. If you know a kid who doesn't like you, do what you can to stay away from them – including speaking to a teacher about seating and groups. • AVOID PLACES WHERE BULLIES ARE. Take different paths to school to avoid being a target. Don't be alone in the hallways, restrooms, empty classrooms. • STAY WITHIN SIGHT OF TEACHERS when at school. If they can see you, they can help • DON'T BRING EXPENSIVE ITEMS OR LOTS OF MONEY to school. Bullies pick on kids who bring things they can take. • CHECK OUT THE WAY YOU PRESENT YOURSELF. Slouching, looking at the ground or your feet, and fidgeting show that you're not sure of yourself. Look confident and the bully probably won't pick on you. • DON'T ACT SCARED - hold your head up, stand up straight, and don't look at the ground or your feet. Fake it ‘til you make it. Bullies don't pick on kids who look confident.
Everyone has the right to be respected and the responsibility to respect others. Everyone can have the power of empathy and tolerance. “No One Can Make You Feel Inferior Without Your Consent” –Eleanor Roosevelt
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