ASSERTIVENESS SKILLS BUILDING SELF ESTEEM Achala Dahal Pratibha

ASSERTIVENESS SKILLS: BUILDING SELF ESTEEM Achala Dahal / Pratibha Dhungana

Am I confident ? Do I respect others ? Do I respect myself ? How is my relationship ? Am I happy?

Know yourself Defining me My favorite music An important person in my life… A dream for future. Something I am good at … I am ……… A boss A mother….

What is Self-Esteem? Self-esteem is the judgment or opinion we hold to the extend to which individuals believes on one selves to be capable, sufficient and worthy. It is the pictures of what we have of ourselves.

What is Self-Esteem? Believing that you can achieve what you set out to do Feeling valuable, important, + worthy of happiness Self-Esteem

Two Major Components Self-efficacy Belief you can achieve what you set out to do Developed though experience of mastery success builds confidence to succeed in other areas Self-respect What you think and feel about yourself Self-respect likely earns respect from others

SELF-EFFICACY + SELF-RESPECT SELF-ESTEEM

How Self-Esteem Develops ? Self-esteem develops over time as you form your SELF-CONCEPT The bundle of facts, opinions, beliefs, and perceptions about yourself that are present every moment of every day. Are you conscious of your self-concept?

Draw with affirmative Card e. g. I am beautiful…

Anuradha Koirala is a Nepalese social activist founder and director of Maiti Nepal – a nonprofit organization in Nepal, dedicated to helping victims of sex trafficking. Ms. Koirala loves spending time with children; they say that they get warmth of mother and a father from her. She is self-motivated person relishing new and dynamic challenges with a leadership role in a team environment or independently.

Sushila Karki The Honorable Sushila Karki is currently the first and only female Chief Justice in the Supreme Court of Nepal. known for her “zero-tolerance policy” against corruption, and helped convict sitting Minister for Information and Communications JP Gupta on the issue. She has been heavily involved with a number of social justice organizations, including the Human Rights Organisation, Amnesty International Nepal, and Nepal Red Cross Society. Karki is also the author of the 2011 paper, “Gender Equality and Justice in Nepal: A Bird’s Eye View”, for which she won an award.

Jhamak Ghimire is a Nepali writer and a columnist for the Nepali newspaper, Kantipur. Ghimire was born with cerebral palsy and as a young child could neither speak, use her hands, or even sit comfortably. Overcame this challenge, teaching herself to write with her left foot. To date, Ghimere has won nine awards for her work. Her autobiography, “Jeevan Kaada ki Phool” (“Is Life a Thorn or a Flower? ”) won her the Madan Puraskar in 2010, the most

Mira Rai is an internationally-renowned runner from rular village. she did train with the rebels which had helped her as she has gone on to become a star athlete. In her first year as a professional athlete, she has won 10 races, including the internationally competitive Asia Skyrunning 50 K Championship in Hong Kong and the international ultra-marathon in France. Today, Rai plans on using her fame to inspire more women and girls to follow their dreams.

Priya Adhikari At 31, Ms Adhikari is the first woman and only one in Nepal to qualify as a helicopter captain. She spends her days in a rescue chopper, carrying out search and rescue operations in the Himalayas. Rescued countless injured climbers from Mount Everest. "I don't want to do a single mistake, so I just want to get my confidence and gain more knowledge. " Safeskies, which is an Australian independent body encouraging discussion on aviation safety, recently invited Ms Adhikari to share her story at its biennial conference in Canberra.

How Self-Esteem Develops ? In Childhood Positive and negative experiences early in life have a significant impact on one’s life, potential, and self-esteem in later years Attention from parents is critical What defining experiences in childhood might occur that would form the foundation of one’s self-esteem?

How Self-Esteem Develops In Adolescence Develop and resolve questions about unique personal identity Describe selves in terms of social relationships and personality traits Role models are important When does adolescence begin and end? In whom do teens find role models?

How Self-Esteem Develops In Adulthood Reinforced self-concept is molded by past Adults tend to define themselves in terms of: Things they possess What they do for a living Their internal value system and emotional makeup

Building self esteem Throughout life, self-esteem can grow–or–deteriorate through a slow evolution The person you will be tomorrow has yet to be created

Individualist culture Independent Self-reliant Achievement oriented Competitive Assertive Pleasure seeking Self-assured Direct Self -interest Collectivist culture Socially interdependent Connected Traditional Cooperative Obedient Self- sacrificing Sensitivity Self-controlled Equalitarian

Self-Esteem Influences Behavior People with LOW self-esteem tend to: Maintain an external locus of control Engage in self-destructive behaviors Have poor human relations skills Not see themselves with great clarity Why are low self-esteem and an external locus of control paired in persons with low self-esteem?

Self-Esteem Influences Behavior People with HIGH self-esteem tend to: Maintain an internal locus of control Feel emotions without letting them affect behavior in a negative way Be less likely to take things personally Accept people as unique, talented individuals Have a productive personality

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Social media and self esteem In-depth interviews with men and women, ranging from ages 28 -73, that are active social media users and found that: 60% of people using social media reported that it has impacted their self-esteem in a negative way 50% reported social media having negative effects on their relationships 80% reported that is easier to be deceived by others through their sharing on social media

The facts: Low self-esteem is linked to violence, school dropout rates, teenage pregnancy, suicide, and low academic achievement (Misetich & Delis-Abrams, 2003). About 44% of girls and 15% of boys in high school are attempting to lose weight (Council on Alcoholism and Drug Abuse, n. d. ). Seven in 10 girls believe that they are not good enough or don’t measure up in some way (Dove Self-Esteem Fund, 2008). A girl’s self-esteem is more strongly related to how she views her own body shape and body weight than how much she actually weighs (Dove Self-Esteem Fund, 2008). Nearly all women (90%) want to change at least one aspect of their physical appearance (Confidence Coalition, n. d. ). The vast majority (81%) of 10 -year old girls are afraid of being fat (Confidence Coalition, n. d. ). Only 2% of women think they are beautiful (Confidence Coalition, n. d. ). Absent fathers, poverty, and a low-quality home environment have a negative impact on self-esteem (Orth, 2018).

These facts on low self-esteem are alarming and disheartening, but thankfully they don’t represent the whole story. The whole story shows that there are many people with a healthy sense of self-esteem, and they enjoy some great benefits and advantages

Builds Self esteem Practic e of living conscio usly Practice of self accepta nce Practic e of self respon sibility Six pillar of self-esteem Practic e of self- asserti veness Practice of living purpos efully Practic e of living with integrit y

How to Build Self-Esteem 1. Identify the source of low self-esteem: Careful examination of defining moments in life Make list of labels others use to describe you Determine which ones you’ve internalized 2. Identify and accept your limitations: Accept yourself for who you are now Don’t demand perfection Don’t dwell on the past

How to Build Self-Esteem 3. Take responsibility for your decisions: Making decisions helps you develop confidence in your own judgment Accept the consequences of your decisions Both successes and mistakes are yours. How might self-esteem influence your perception of healthy challenge and realistic limitation?

How to Build Self-Esteem 4. Engage in strength building: Maximize your strengths Strength building requires knowledge and skill Identify your dominant talents Talent: Any naturally recurring pattern of thought, feeling, or behavior that can be productively applied

How to Build Self-Esteem 5. Seek the support and guidance of mentors Broadening the definition of “mentor: Tips to building a mentoring relationship: Find a mentor who is a good coach Market yourself to a prospective mentor Use multiple mentors Who are mentors, and what do they do?

How to Build Self-Esteem 6. Set goals: People who set goals maintain high self-esteem Make your goals realistic Picture yourself reaching the goal GOALS 1) 2) 3)

Goal-setting Principles 1. Spend time reflecting on the things you want to change in your life. 2. Develop a goal-setting plan that includes the steps necessary to achieve the goal. 3. Modify your environment by changing the stimuli around you. 4. Monitor your behavior, and reward your progress.

How to Build Self-Esteem 7. Practice guided imagery: A creative and empowering method to harness the power of the mind: To visualize means to form a mental image of something—if you want to succeed, picture yourself succeeding over and over What is an example of guided imagery? Of visualization?

How to Build Self-Esteem ? 8. Create self-talk statements for your goals: 1. Be specific about the behavior you want to change 2. Begin each statement with “I” 3. Describe the results you want to achieve Create three positive self-talk statements

FIGURE 3. 1 The Self-Talk Endless Loop

Factors That Enhance the Self-Esteem of Employees

Take away… It is OK to be who you are, to be an individual, to not to be good at everything , It makes you UNIQUE; Self esteem is not fixed; can and does change; You can learn to buildup your self-esteem; Remind yourself, I am an OK person” I do have strengthen, it’s true.

Have a great day.